FROM THE 6 O'CLOCK TEAM, GOODNIGHT. IT'S GOT AVOCADO AND A SALSA ON TOP OF IT. IT'S MKR BEHIND BARS. SOME OF THEM HAVE DONE SOME BAD THINGS, BUT THEY'RE NOT ALL BAD. PLUS... OH, THAT'S A BIG TICK IN MY BOOK. < YEAH? YEAH, THAT'S A BIG TICK. YEAH. BUT COULD YOU PUT YOUR MONEY ON THIS GUY? I'M MORE THAN HAPPY TO WORK WITHIN THE RACING INDUSTRY. AND SHE MIGHT'VE COME IN LIKE... # ...A WRECKING BALL. # YES. WELL, NOW MILEY'S GETTING A CRASH COURSE IN BEING KIWI. GIVE ME YOUR BEST CRACK AT THAT. WHAT DO YOU MEAN? WAIT. SO YOU SAY IT FIRST. ONE NEWS CAPTIONS BY IMOGEN STAINES AND VIRGINIA PHILP. WWW.ABLE.CO.NZ CAPTIONS WERE MADE POSSIBLE WITH FUNDING FROM NZ ON AIR. COPYRIGHT ABLE 2014 DUE TO THE LIVE NATURE OF SEVEN SHARP, WE APOLOGISE FOR THE LACK OF CAPTIONS FOR SOME ITEMS. Good evening. Welcome to Seven Sharp. The Miley interview will run tonight. I am very like the Prime Minister this evening. I have a report. I read this morning that we have offended a small town. Unfortunately, I wasn't in the country for it. I look at the report, and who do you offend? Thames. Thames is upset. They have a big sign, and they want apologies. I knew nothing of it. I wasn't even here. I'll explain it a bit later. HERE'S WHAT CAUGHT OUR EYE TODAY ` AND THE DIRTY POLITICS SCANDAL IS TURNING INTO A REAL 'HE SAID, HE SAID'. TWO LETTERS WERE RELEASED TODAY. THE OPPOSITION SAYS IT HAS A SMOKING GUN TO PROVE THE PM LIED ABOUT A LEAK OF SIS INFORMATION TO CAMERON SLATER. JOHN KEY'S HIT BACK WITH A HIGH-LEVEL LETTER HE SAYS BACKS HIS VERSION OF EVENTS. IF YOU'RE A FAN OF AN E-READER OVER AND OLD FASHIONED PAPERBACK, WELL, NEW RESEARCH SAYS YOU'RE GETTING LESS OUT OF READING BECAUSE YOU DON'T REMEMBER AS MUCH ABOUT A STORY FROM AN ELECTRONIC DEVICE. AND ANOTHER DOOZY FROM THE 'WE LOVE RUSSIAN DASH CAMS' FILE. THIS MOTORCYCLIST CRASHES INTO THE BACK OF A CAR, LANDING ON HIS FEET ON ITS ROOF. AMAZING. BUT IT LOOKS PRETTY STAGED TO US. IF YOU THINK REALITY TV COOKING SHOWS ARE TOUGH, THINK AGAIN. WE'VE FOUND SOME AMATEUR CHEFS CREATING MASTERPIECES IN VERY TOUGH CONDITIONS. THEY'RE NOT ALLOWED TO GO TO THE SUPERMARKET. THEY CAN'T USE THE INTERNET. IN FACT, THEY'RE JUST LUCKY TO HAVE ACCESS TO KNIVES. THEY'RE INMATES AT RIMUTAKA PRISON. JEHAN CASINADER MET SOME CONVICTED KILLERS WHO ARE CARVING IT UP IN THE KITCHEN. IT'S KAI TIME IN THE BIG HOUSE. THEY'RE READY FOR IT, YEAH. THEY ALWAYS ARE. THEY'RE HUNGRY. YEAH. BEHIND THE WIRE, 900 MEN ARE WAITING. IT'S 3.30 IN THE AFTERNOON, AND THE PRISONERS ARE ABOUT TO BE FED. THEY GET THREE SQUARE MEALS A DAY, AND THEY'RE FED FOR JUST $4.60. YEAH, I WAS TOTALLY APPREHENSIVE ABOUT COMING OUT HERE. A SENSE OF DREAD AND FOREBODING AND A FEAR OF THE UNKNOWN. TODAY THERE'S A GUEST ON THE DINNER RUN ` MY VIEW OR PERCEPTION OF PRISON WAS BASED ON WHAT I'D SEEN ON TELLY. CELEBRITY CHEF MARTIN BOSLEY. THE CAMERA'S HERE. THEY KNOW WE'RE GOING TO A BREAK. I FIND IT REALLY INTIMIDATING. I FIND IT QUITE CONFRONTING. THEY'RE LOCKED UP IN THEIR CELLS, AND THEY EAT ALONE IN THEIR CELLS. I FEEL DESPONDENT. IT'S JUST LIKE, 'SHIT, THIS IS IT.' THIS IS WHAT THEIR LIFE IS LIKE? THIS IS IT. AND MOST NZERS WOULDN'T LAST FIVE MINUTES IN HERE. IT'S JUST OVERWHELMINGLY OPPRESSIVE. EACH PRISONER COSTS US 100 GRAND A YEAR. WHAT WE'VE GOT HERE IS A TYPICAL BREAKFAST. THEIR MEALS ARE ANYTHING BUT FINE DINING. MARMITE OR VEGEMITE AND BAKED BEANS. SO, SIX SLICES OF BREAD WITH FILLINGS AND A PIECE OF FRUIT. PRISONERS ALREADY COOK EACH OTHER'S MEALS. WE TREAT THE PRISONERS THE SAME WAY AS WE EXPECT THEM TO TREAT US, WITH THE SAME RESPECT SOME OF THEM HAVE DONE SOME BAD THINGS, BUT THEY'RE NOT ALL BAD. I THINK THEY'RE RARE. MARTIN WANTED TO TURN SOME OF OUR WORST OFFENDERS INTO TOP CHEFS. THEY DIDN'T SPEAK VERY MUCH, AND I THOUGHT 'THIS IS GOING TO BE TOUGH. 'THIS IS GOING TO BE REALLY TOUGH.' BUT OVER THAT PERIOD OF TIME, THEY REALLY OPENED UP. YOU COULD SAY HE HAD A CAPTIVE AUDIENCE. THAT'S THE REASON THESE MEN ARE IN JAIL, BUT I CAN'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT THAT. SOME OF THESE GUYS ARE ON LIFE SENTENCES. I'VE BEEN IN JAIL 14 YEARS. I SPENT 10 OR 11 OF THOSE JUST STUMBLING ALONG, DOING NOTHING. YOU LOOK BACK, AND IT'S YEARS LATER. AND IT'S, LIKE, 'WOW.' PRISON IS 95% BOREDOM. NOTHING HAPPENS. AND WE ONLY EVER HEAR ABOUT THE BAD STUFF THAT HAPPENS. SO I'VE BEEN STANDING AROUND IN THE KITCHEN WITH A BUNCH OF MURDERERS, SOME OF THEM, GUYS WHO ARE IN HERE FOR 10 YEARS, 15 YEARS, GUYS WHO ARE NOW STANDING AROUND, CHOPPING UP SALMON AND BRAISING BEEF CHEEKS. WE OFTEN WORRY ABOUT PRISONERS BEING RELEASED INTO OUR STREETS, BUT MANY OF THESE GUYS SAY THEY WORRY ABOUT WHAT LIFE WILL BE LIKE ON THE OUTSIDE. HOW TERRIFIED THEY ARE. THEY KNOW THAT SOCIETY ACTUALLY ISN'T REALLY GEARED UP TO ACCEPT THEM BACK. IT'S LIKE A WAVE OF ALMOST ANXIETY SOMETIMES WHEN I REALLY THINK ABOUT IT BECAUSE IT'S A SCARY THING, THE THOUGHT OF GETTING OUT SOMETIME. AND THEN WE'LL ROAST THAT OFF TO MEDIUM RARE. MAYBE 180. THE ULTIMATE GOAL IS TO GIVE THEM SOMETHING SO WHEN THEY GET OUT THAT THEY ACTUALLY HAVE SOME SORT OF QUALIFICATION OR SOME WORK SKILLS THAT THEY CAN OFFER THE COMMUNITY. WHILE SERVING TIME, THEY'RE ALSO SERVING PAYING DINERS FROM THE PUBLIC OVER THREE NIGHTS AS PART OF THE 'WELLINGTON ON A PLATE' FESTIVAL. WE'RE DOING MONKFISH THAT'S BEEN WRAPPED WITH PANCETTA, A RABBIT RAGOUT, SO A WILD RABBIT RAGOUT. SAVOURY ECLAIR PUFF THINGS WITH` IT'S GOT AVOCADO AND A SALSA ON TOP OF IT, YEAH. I'LL GET YOU ON THE LINE FOR THE ENTREE, PLEASE. THEY'VE SPENT HUNDREDS OF HOURS SHARPENING THEIR SKILLS. IT'S BASICALLY TRYING TO CHANGE YOUR LIFESTYLE. THAT'S GIVING YOU SOMETHING TO LOOK FORWARD TO, RATHER THAN THE SAME CRAP THAT YOU'VE DONE ALL YOUR LIFE. THE FOUR COURSE MEAL IS A HIT. DISHES LIKE THIS WERE DESIGNED BY THE INMATES, AND THEY'D RIVAL ANYTHING MADE ON A FOOD SHOW. MAYBE THAT'S THE NEXT STEP WE HAVE TO LOOK AT ` ENTERING A COUPLE` PRISON MASTERCHEF? PRISON MASTERCHEF. ARE YOU WILLING TO FUND THAT? MARTIN RECKONS THE RECIPE IS A SIMPLE ONE. A MAN THAT CAN GET A JOB AND EARN MONEY CAN FEED HIS FAMILY AND TENDS TO NOT REOFFEND. TOP EFFORT. WELL DONE. THAT WAS AWESOME. FIRST ONE OUT OF THE WAY. THE INMATES SAY THEY FEEL A SENSE OF PRIDE. GIVES US SOMETHING POSITIVE TO DO, AND WE CAN DO IT, AND IT'S NOT JUST IN COOKING. AND AS FOR MARTIN,... THE CHANGE THAT HAPPENED. I THINK, PROBABLY THE MORE DRAMATIC CHANGE HAPPENED TO ME THAN HAPPENED TO THEM. THEY GAVE ME EMPATHY. Glad he said that, because I talk to Martin about that. He got really revolutionised by that. His restaurant in Wellington was fabulous. I wonder whether it will have results at the other end. I would like to see where they are at in a couple of years We had the carving that Michael did. Up at Ngawhai. Do you think you'll be something we listening to night, saying 'why do they get to do the cooking?' What's the alternative? Go and break some rocks. COMING UP ON SEVEN SHARP ` ALWAYS THINK FOUR MOVES AHEAD. THAT GOES FOR POLITICS AS WELL, I SUPPOSE. ANOTHER POLITICAL BAD, BAD BOY ON HIS LINE OF WORK. IT CONTRIBUTES JUST AS MUCH TO THE ECONOMY AS THE FISHING INDUSTRY AND IS A HUGE EMPLOYER IN PROVINCIAL NZ. UH-UH. I GOT NO TRICKS. I CAN'T EVEN DO THE TONGUE-TO-THE-NOSE THING. I'VE TRIED. I STICK TO THAT. MILEY MEETS HER MATCH. With a St John Medical Alarm, you have the confidence to enjoy living at home. If there's an emergency, you can press the button and it connects directly with St John, who'll know exactly what's needed, from reassuring advice... to dispatching the right help for your situation. It feels like having St John right here in your own home. Call 0800 50 23 23 and find out about a free trial. TODD BARCLAY. REMEMBER, YOU MET HIM LAST NIGHT ON THE SHOW. HE'S NATIONAL'S CANDIDATE FOR THE CLUTHA-SOUTHLAND ELECTORATE. HE USED TO WORK FOR ONE OF THE WORLD'S BIGGEST TOBACCO COMPANIES. HE ALSO TOLD US ABOUT A LABOUR CANDIDATE WHO WORKS IN THE RACING INDUSTRY. YEP, THE SMOKING MAN AND THE GAMBLING MAN. HEATHER DU PLESSIS-ALLAN WENT TO MEET THE BAD BOY OF POLITICS FROM THE LEFT. GIDDAY. HOW ARE YA? HE SAYS HE'S ONLY DOING WHAT AN MP SHOULD BE DOING ` HEY. POPPING IN TO SEE WHAT THE LOCALS ARE UP TO. ALWAYS THINK FOUR MOVES AHEAD. THAT GOES FOR POLITICS AS WELL, I SUPPOSE. THIS ISN'T ABOUT COLLECTING VOTES. WELL, OBVIOUSLY THERE'S NOT MANY VOTES HERE. IT'S ABOUT GETTING TO KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON IN THE DISTRICT. EVEN IF YOU'RE ONLY THERE FOR HALF AN HOUR, THEY APPRECIATE YOU POPPING IN AND SAYING GIDDAY AND SEEING HOW THINGS ARE GOING. KIERAN KNOWS PLENTY OF THE PEOPLE WE THAT WE MEET. HE'S A LOCAL BOY, YOU SEE, AND APPARENTLY THAT MATTERS TO LOCALS. OH, THAT'S A BIG TICK IN MY BOOK. < YEAH? YEAH, THAT'S A BIG TICK. YEAH, DEFINITELY. YEAH, IT'S BEEN NEARLY 15 YEARS SINCE THE WAIRARAPA HAD A BORN AND BRED LOCAL AS THE MP. TO PROVE HIS CREDENTIALS, KIERAN TAKES US TO MEET NANA BETTY. HELLO. HELLO. THIS IS NANA. BETTY'S NOT SO SURE ABOUT KIERAN BECOMING AN MP. OH, DO YOU THINK THAT'LL HAPPEN? IF SOMEBODY WRITES A LETTER INTO THE PAPER AND THEY MIGHT BE A LITTLE BIT CRITICAL, I TEND TO GET A TEXT FROM NANA SAYING 'HAVE YOU READ THE PAPER?' NOT THE USUAL GRANDMOTHERLY DUTIES YOU'D EXPECT. BUT TRUTH IS, BETTY'S USED TO HAVING STRONG POLITICAL OPINIONS ABOUT THE HOUSE. WHEN I GOT MARRIED, THE MCANULTY FAMILY WERE... STAUNCH LABOUR SUPPORTERS. THAT'S DAVID SHEARER WITH BETTY AND HER LATE HUSBAND, BARRY. GRANDAD'S FATHER WOULD WALK DOWN THE STREET, AND PEOPLE WOULD DIVE FOR COVER, BECAUSE 'HERE COMES THE LABOUR MAN IN TOWN'. GIVE US ANOTHER LECTURE. (LAUGHS) KIERAN IS SO KEEN ON GETTING THE JOB HE'S MOVED HIMSELF AND HIS WIFE INTO HIS FOLKS' HOME. MUM AND DAD AREN'T HERE. IT'D BE A DIFFERENT STORY IF THEY WERE LIVING HERE. WE PROBABLY WOULDN'T DO IT. THEY'VE SOLD THEIR PLACE SO HE DOESN'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT A MORTGAGE. WHICH BRINGS US TO KIERAN'S DAY JOB. YEP, HE IS STILL A BOOKIE. I SUGGEST YOU EITHER PICK A HORSE BECAUSE OF ITS NAME OR HAVE AN EASY BET AND HOPE FOR THE BEST. YEAH, WE'LL SEE IF KIERAN'S 'ADVICE' WORKS. COME ON, JUST IDEAL. BUT MEANWHILE, WE SHOULD PROBABLY TALK ABOUT THIS BOOKIE BUSINESS. I'M MORE THAN HAPPY TO WORK WITHIN THE RACING INDUSTRY. IT CONTRIBUTES JUST AS MUCH TO THE ECONOMY AS THE FISHING INDUSTRY AND IS A HUGE EMPLOYER IN PROVINCIAL NZ, AND AS A PROVINCIAL CANDIDATE, THAT'S IMPORTANT TO ME. NOT EVERYONE LIKES THAT HE'S A BOOKIE. THE NATIONAL PARTY TOBACCO LAD IN CLUTHA SOUTHLAND LOVES TO MENTION IT. WELL, NOT LONG AFTER MY SELECTION DOWN HERE, THE LABOUR PARTY SELECTED A TAB BOOKIE WHO IS RUNNING IN WAIRARAPA. I COULDN'T CARE LESS WHAT HE'S DONE. IT'S WHAT HE DOES AS AN MP THAT MATTERS. NOW, AS YOU MAY HAVE PREDICTED... WHERE'S MY MAN? GO, JUST IDEAL! SECOND. YEAH, HE GOT A PLACE. NOT BAD, BUT KIERAN KNOWS IN HIS RACE, SECOND PLACE WON'T PAY OUT. HE'S BETTING ON HIMSELF FOR A WIN. AND IF HE DOES WIN, BUSY AS HE MAY BECOME, HE RECKONS HE'LL KEEP DOING THIS. YEAH. OH NO, I'LL BE BACK. DON'T WORRY. I would say the tobacco industry is worse than gambling. In saying that, he has done a great job. He is open and honest about it. I wouldn't be an MP, though. Who would be an MP? You get a good salary, though. What about Todd last night? He had to split from this girl. It's a hard life. NEXT ON SEVEN SHARP ` # I WILL ALWAYS WANT YOU. HEY, NZ, I'M MILEY CYRUS. # I CAME IN LIKE A WRECKING BALL. WE KNOW MILEY WANTS TO BUY A FARM HERE, AND IT LOOKS LIKE SHE'S GOT A HEADSTART ON THE LIVESTOCK. AND I'M GONNA INTRODUCE BOBBA SUE TO MY PITBULL THAT I HAVE AT HOME. IT'S VERY LA. IT'S REALLY LA AND HIPSTER. THEY'RE ALL GLUTEN-FREE. AND, DEAR THAMES, WE KNOW WHAT WE DID, AND WE'RE SORRY, BUT IT'S NOT ALL OUR FAULT. SOFT GUITAR MUSIC Sam felt fine spending $45 on perfectly good wine. And why wouldn't he, after they enjoyed the entire show together, right from the start, because he got to the station two minutes early, all thanks to saving valuable time paying Doug the lawn guy with his phone. Time really is money. To keep both running smoothly, talk to ANZ about switching banks today. Reading through this report on the small town this programme defamed, there is a lot of positive things in this report. I can see why the story went right. I didn't do the story. I was commenting on it. SO, SHE HOPPED OFF THE PLANE AT LAX WITH HER DREAM AND HER CARDIGAN, THEN SHE STARTED POKING OUT HER TONGUE, TWERKING AND POSTING VIDEOS OF HERSELF SMOKING POT. YEP, AS WE TOLD YOU LAST NIGHT, MILEY CYRUS WILL PERFORM ONE SHOW IN OCTOBER. SHE'E BEEN FAMOUS FOR YEARS. REMEMBER HANNAH MONTANA? BUT MORE RECENTLY IT'S BEEN FOR CONTROVERSIES AS MUCH AS HER MUSIC. JACK TAME SAT DOWN WITH MILEY IN CHICAGO FOR HER ONLY NZ TV INTERVIEW. # I CAME IN LIKE A WRECKING BALL. # OK, BEFORE THIS START, LET'S CLEAN THE SLATE. I MAKE FUN OF MYSELF AS MUCH AS EVERYONE ELSE MAKES FUN OF ME. BE HONEST ` WHEN YOU THINK OF MILEY CYRUS, YOU'VE PROBABLY GOT A FEW PRECONCEPTIONS, RIGHT? DO YOU THINK OF YOURSELF AS A BIT RAUNCHY? THE DIFFERENCE OF JUST DOING A SHOW AND JUST BEING LIKE, BASICALLY, A STRIPPER AND DOING THE SHOW AND, LIKE, PUTTING SOME HEART INTO A PERFORMANCE. THE SHOW IS ALSO FUNNY. THERE'S NOTHING SERIOUS ABOUT THIS SHOW. # I'MMA DO MY THANG, SO DON'T YOU WORRY 'BOUT... # FOR SOME, MILEY IS NOTHING MORE THAN A SWEARING POT-SMOKING TWERKING 21-YEAR-OLD IN NEXT TO NO CLOTHING AND NEXT TO NO BOUNDARIES. YOU SEE SOME OF THE DADS HATE IT, AND THEN THE DADS LOVE IT. # I CAME IN LIKE A WRECKING BALL. # I NEVER HIT SO HARD IN LOVE. # I'VE DESIGNED A BIT OF A POP QUIZ. YOU'RE OGING TO HAVE TO EXCUSE ME COS MY CRAFTING SKILLS ARE PRETTY LAME. BUT WHICH OF THESE IS A KIWI? WELL, THAT, BUT IS THAT GONNA BE CALLED A KIWI TOO? IS THAT A TRICK QUESTION? YEAH, THAT'S A BIRD. YEAH, WELL, THAT'S A KIWI. YEAH. AND THEN THAT IS ALSO A KIWI. IS THAT A TRICK QUESTION? THAT'S RIGHT. YOU SEE, IT'S SMALL, IT'S BROWN, IT'S FLIGHTLESS, IT'S FURRY; IT'S LIKELY TO BE A KIWI. DO YOU GUYS HAVE EMUS? NO, THAT'S AUSTRALIA. FOR HER MILLIONS OF FANS, MILEY CYRUS IS NOTHING SHORT OF A GENIUS. HARDCORE ROCKER DUDES COME. OTHER GIRLS IN THE INDUSTRY COME. PEOPLE ASK ME WHAT'S THE CORE GROUP OF PEOPLE THAT COME TO THE SHOW, AND THERE IS NONE. AND ONE THING'S FOR SURE. 10 YEARS SINCE SHE FIRST TOURED, 10 YEARS SINCE DISNEY MADE THE DAUGHTER OF BILLY RAY THE WORLD'S BIGGEST CHILD STAR,... MILEY. WHAT? JUST GO ASK JOSH OUT. I CAN'T. I'M FROM TENNESSEE. WE JUST DON'T DO THAT. ...HANNAH MONTANA IS ALL GROWN UP. I'VE GOT A BETTER BUDGET, THAT'S FOR SURE. WE WERE JUST TALKING ABOUT MY FIRST TOUR THAT I WENT ON WHICH A LOT OF MY CREW WORKED ON. I WAS 12. AND, LITERALLY, MY INTRO WAS A SHEET, AND IT WASN'T BIG ENOUGH, SO MY MOM SEWED TWO BEDSHEETS TOGETHER. # AND WE CAN'T STOP. # AND WE WON'T STOP. # THIS IS HOW WE SAY HELLO DOWN SOUTH. NOW, CAN YOU GIVE ME YOUR BEST CRACK AT THAT? WHAT DO YOU MEAN? WAIT, SO YOU SAY IT FIRST. IT'S PRONOUNCED 'KYA-OWRA'. KIA ORA. 'KEY ORA.' KIA ORA. THAT'S PRETTY GOOD. KIA ORA. OK, THAT'S INTERESTING. YEAH, SO YOU SAY, 'KIA ORA, BRO.' KIA ORA, BRO. EH, BRO. COOL. MILEY CYRUS HAS NOTCHED UP FIVE CONSECUTIVE BILLBOARD NUMBER-ONE ALBUMS. HER BANGERZ TOUR IS ONLY ADDING TO AN ESTIMATED FORTUNE OF MORE THAN $150M. OH YEAH, AND LAST WEEK SHE BOUGHT A PIG. BOBBA SUE IS IN THE DRESSING ROOM RIGHT NOW. SHE'S READY TO GO BACK TO LA, AND I'M GONNA INTRODUCE BOBBA SUE TO MY PITBULL THAT I HAVE AT HOME. I HAVE A CHIHUAHUA, WHICH, ACTUALLY, THE PREY INSTINCTS OF CHIHUAHUA ARE HIGHER THAN PITBULLS, SO WE'LL SEE. I GOTTA SLOWLY INTRODUCE BOBBA SUE INTO THE FAMILY. IT'S VERY LA AND HIPSTER. THEY'RE ALL GLUTEN-FREE. AND MILEY CYRUS WILL TELL YOU THAT WITH THE CRITICISM AND THE SCANDALS AND THE BREAK-UP WITH THE MOVIE-STAR FIANCE, SHE ACTUALLY HATES THAT HOLLYWOOD STUFF. MY PROBLEM WITH DOING, LIKE, RED CARPETS ` THESE PAPARAZZI DUDES, THEY STAND AT THE OTHER END OF THE RED CARPET, AND THEY YELL, LIKE, 'BLOW ME A KISS.' AND IT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA VOMIT COS IT'S JUST SO DEGRADING AND I FEEL LIKE SUCH A PAGEANT GIRL. AND THAT, PERHAPS, IS WHAT LEADS TO THIS. # MUST WANNA GET NASTY. # YOU SEE, JUST LIKE HER GODMOTHER, DOLLY PARTON, AND JUST LIKE THAT OTHER BIG M WHOM SHE COLLABORATED WITH EARLIER THIS YEAR, MILEY CYRUS IS A YOUNG WOMAN DETERMINED TO BE IN CHARGE OF HER OWN IMAGE. # I KNOW YOU WANT IT, BABY. # I KNOW YOU WANT IT. # TELL ME ABOUT THE TONGUE. IS IT FAIR TO SAY THAT YOU ARE INTO TONGUE STUFF? I DON'T HAVE MANY TRICKS. THAT'S ALL I'VE GOT. OK, WHAT ABOUT THE SPINNY THING? CAN YOU GO...? UH-UH. I GOT NO TRICKS. I CAN'T EVEN DO THE TONGUE-TO-THE-NOSE THING. I'VE TRIED. I STICK TO THAT. You like Dolly Parton. Does that make you like Miley more now? She's made a big transition. We did have a big discussion today. Our kid is not registered. The other kids with parents who would go. She has potential trouble. Parents might send their kids to Taylor Swift. YOU JUST SAW A BIT OF MILEY'S CONTROVERSIAL PERFORMANCE AT THE VMAS LAST YEAR. WELL, IT'S JUST BEEN CONFIRMED SHE'LL BE BACK AT THE SCENE OF THE CRIME AT THIS YEAR'S AWARDS ON SUNDAY IN LA. NOW, WE SHOULD PROBABLY TALK ABOUT THAMES, BECAUSE IT SEEMS THE TOWN'S NOT VERY HAPPY WITH US. YOU MIGHT REMEMBER GILL HIGGINS' STORY FROM EARLY JULY ABOUT HOW THE TOWN SHOULD BE RED-ZONED. I DON'T LIKE DOING THIS, BUT SOMEONE HAS TO WARN THEM. THIS IS A TOWN UNDER THREAT. FUNKY MUSIC WELL, NOW THIS HAS HAPPENED. YES, THAT IS A BILLBOARD JOKING ABOUT WATCHING THIS SHOW BECAUSE OF GILL'S STORY. THAMES, WE ARE SORRY IF WE OFFENDED YOU. THE LAST THING WE WANT IS ANOTHER MINGIUNI INCIDENT. ALSO, WE HAVE TO POINT OUT THE BASIS OF OUR STORY WAS THIS REPORT, WHICH IS BASED ON CENSUS DATA FROM LAST YEAR. WE DIDN'T JUST DECIDE TO PICK ON YOU FOR NO REASON. I wasn't here. IN FACT, GILL ALSO FOCUSED ON A FEW POSITIVES ABOUT THAMES. I LOVE THE LIFESTYLE. IT'S THE BEST PLACE TO LIVE. THE HUNTING, THE FISHING. THERE'S A $2 SHOP. DO YOU THINK IT'S ON ITS LAST LEGS? FAR FROM IT. IT'S NO DYING TOWN. FUNKY MUSIC Can I point out that I focused on the positives toO? Mitre 10 Thames is one of the best. JUST BEFORE WE GO, WE WANT YOU TO GET INVOLVED IN THE SHOW. SOMETIMES FUNNY STUFF HAPPENS, AND WE WANT YOUR TAKE ON IT VIA OUR NEW 'MEME MACHINE'. GET ONLINE. UPLOAD A MEME. ALL THE INSTRUCTIONS ARE THERE, ALONG WITH SOME EXAMPLES. AND THE BEST ONES WILL WIN AN IPAD MINI. WE'RE GIVING AWAY ONE A WEEK FOR THE NEXT FOUR WEEKS. It is a limited edition. It's part of my grand pLan to monetise the show. YOU CAN FIND THE LINK TO THE MEME MACHINE ON OUR FACEBOOK PAGE OR JUST VISIT 'WE SHOULD PROBABLY TALK ABOUT THIS'.CO.NZ 'RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS' DAY IS JUST OVER A WEEK AWAY, SO TONIGHT I THOUGHT I'D HELP OUT WITH A BIT OF INSPIRATION. SEE, I WAS INSPIRED TO BY OUR TARANAKI REPORTER HAYDN JONES. YOU MIGHT HAVE SEEN HIS STORY ON ONE NEWS ABOUT PETER VAN'T WOUT, WHO MADE IT HIS MISSION TO DO ONE RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS A WEEK ALL YEAR. HE DID THINGS LIKE PAINT HOUSES. HE GAVE A STRANGER A GROCERY VOUCHER AT THE SUPERMARKET. THEN I STUMBLED ON THIS PIC, OLDER MAN STRUGGLING TO BEND DOWN TO TIE HIS SHOE, AND A RANDOM SHOPPER STEPS IN TO SORT THE PROBLEM. NOW, EVERYONE HAS A DIFFERENT DEFINITION OF WHAT ACTUALLY IS A RANDOM ACT. FOR EXAMPLE, MIKE HERE RECKONS SAYING HI TO HIS SEVEN SHARP COLLEAGUES EQUATES TO A RANDOM ACT, BUT I THINK WE CAN DO A WHOLE LOT BETTER THAN THAT. SO IF YOU'VE GOT ANY SUGGESTIONS ON WHAT WE CAN BOTH DO ON SEPTEMBER 1ST, LET US KNOW AND WE'LL GET AMONGST IT. UNDER NORMAL CIRCUMSTANCES, I'D BE AGHAST AT TODAY'S VOTE FROM THE NZEI ON THE GOVERNMENT'S PLAN FOR TEACHERS AND PRINCIPALS, BUT THEN THIS IS THE NZEI, AND IF ANYTHING IS HOLDING EDUCATIONAL EXCELLENCE BACK IN THIS COUNTRY, IT'S UNIONS LIKE THE NZEI. IF YOU REMEMBER, THE GOVERNMENT WANTS LEAD TEACHERS AND PRINCIPALS. THEY'LL BE PAID MORE AND SPREAD THEIR TALENTS AROUND OTHER TEACHERS AND OTHER SCHOOLS. IT WAS ALMOST UNIVERSALLY WELCOMED AT THE TIME BY UNIONS, TEACHERS AND PARENTS ALIKE, SOMETHING THAT IN EDUCATION IS VIRTUALLY UNHEARD OF. EVEN TODAY THE MINISTER ANNOUNCED A MEMORANDUM OF UNDERSTANDING WITH PRINCIPALS FROM OTHER ORGANISATIONS. I HAVE SEEN THE WORK OF BRILLIANT PRINCIPALS. THEY TURN SCHOOLS AROUND. GREAT TEACHERS CHANGE LIVES. EVERY PARENT KNOWS THIS. WE DESPERATELY NEED THESE PEOPLE REWARDED AND ENCOURAGED, AND SCHOOLS THAT STRUGGLE NEED THEIR HELP. THE NZEI AND THEIR 93% REJECTION OF THIS TODAY IS DANGEROUS. GREAT ADVANCE WAS NEVER MADE BY CONSTANTLY AND CONSISTENTLY SAYING NO. CAPTIONS BY FINN SCOTT-KELLY AND PIPPA JEFFERIES. CAPTIONS WERE MADE POSSIBLE WITH FUNDING FROM NZ ON AIR.