1 Tonight on 20/20 ` She has to be behind a barrier to talk to you. The world of women behind bars. When you pulled the trigger, what were you thinking? When you pulled the trigger, what were you thinking? I wasn't. Locked up for gruesome crimes. We call it 'life row'. We call it 'life row'. It's life row. Life row? Mm-hm. Mm-hm. < Why? Mm-hm. < Why? We're not dying. We're living. Those on notorious death row... Do you ever think, 'I might be executed?' Do you ever think, 'I might be executed?' No. You can't have that mentality. ...and preparing for life on the outside. Wave. I practise, like, every day. Even in my cell. Can they stay straight after decades locked up? Real air. (CHUCKLES) Real air. Copyright Able 2015 Kia ora. I'm Sonya Wilson. In America, women are the fastest-growing part of the prison population. Tonight 20/20 takes you on a journey into their world, living behind bars. We begin with an inside look at the issue of mental health in state prisons. Now, get this for a statistic ` America's jails house 10 times the amount of mentally ill as America's hospitals. Inmates like 26-year-old Lindsey. Jailed for killing her newborn twins, she won't even be eligible for parole until she's 85. Two little girls who raise hard questions about crime, mental illness and women in prison. Lindsey sang in the choir at church, a college graduate who worked at a dentist's office while living at home with her parents. She helped nurse her mother through a brain tumour ` an ideal daughter in a very Christian family. On visiting day, her younger sister Lacey, then Mom and Dad, come. Mom is a travel agent. He's the manager of an automotive dealership. Every Sunday, this has become their church. Father in Heaven, we're thankful for this day. You know, as a parent, you can imagine a lot of things that might happen to your child that you don't wanna happen. Daddy loves you. Daddy loves you. I love you. But you don't ever think about this. This ` the life that began one day at home, when Lindsey's mother walked toward her laundry basket. She did the unthinkable. Lindsey Lowe... Local coverage descended on the story of the newborn twins found there no longer alive. The parents didn't even know their daughter was pregnant. This is a police tape of Lindsey Lowe. My family's very conservative Christian people. I didn't wanna disappoint anybody. I was just trying to, like, keep the babies quiet. She says to keep them quiet, she put her hands over the babies' mouths. Lindsey's parents and lawyers say it's clear she had a psychotic break. She wasn't hiding the crime. She left the babies at home. Disassociative symptoms, confusion, delirium and stupor. She was on suicide watch after her arrest. Then, after the verdict,... We, the jury, find the defendant guilty of first-degree felony murder. ...she turns toward her stricken family and mouths, 'I'm OK.' The 26-year-old woman will not even be able to see a parole officer until she is 85. Today at the Tennessee prison, she's on medication, joining the 63% of inmates here who line up for pills as many as three times a day. That's three hours. It's` It's hell. That's what happens when mental help breaks down. There's one of the biggest differences between male and female prisons. Nearly 60% of women come in after physical or sexual abuse. For men, it's just 16%. Primarily, for those who are mentally ill and in crisis, a suicide watch. These patients are placed in a kind of isolation ` bare cells ` for their protection. No sheets, pillows allowed ` only smocks. If you have long sleeves, there's a possibility of you strangling yourself. But the question ` should this be the role of America's prisons? Housing an estimated 10 times the number of mentally ill as America's hospitals. Here there are some medical personnel, but inmates stand watch day and night. In the last five years, despite attempts,... How are you feeling today? ...there have been no deaths by suicide. Heavenly Father, we just want to pray the Lord. Amen. WOMAN SHOUTS INDISTINCTLY And across the country, more bare cells for those with anger and impulse control problems... (GRUNTS) ...who threaten violence against officers and other inmates. Here in Washington state, prisoners chained to chairs and desk ` Angry. ...attending a class on using words instead of fists. Worried and anxious. Here, too, stone walls, stone beds, stone desk. WOMAN: Mommy! A constant din of haunting howls on the quarter. I love you, Mommy! In one cell ` Anna Castellano ` alcoholic mother, foster care, sexual abuse. I get angry. I get angry fast. Before prison, she attempted suicide. She wonders about other lives. Like, just normal people out there, you know? Like, what am I doing wrong? I think that they come home from a good job and see their wife or whatever, and just have a home; a bed ` place to sleep. Happy. Ice cream. Pizza. (CHUCKLES) You know? In the two decades I've been covering prisons, there has been a growing controversy about the use of solitary, which prisons call 'segregation'. There is also a change in access. Oh, it was a long night. I won't say it wasn't. Someone's praying down the hall. Today, more secrecy concerned about security. We can't go inside. But in the windows, I can see the faces of women trying to hold on to something on the outside. DOOR BUZZES Two teachers come with lessons in grammar, math. OK. I'm back. Today's lesson has to do with the commas. He even leaves a homework assignment. And you can try and have that done tomorrow. OK? All righty. Bye. Can you read about rectangles right there? Can you read about rectangles right there? READS: Rectangles are everywhere. > You would think they would say, 'Why bother? Why bother? I'm here.' Back in Maryland, we go to meet that other little girl in the photo you saw earlier. Her name ` Sirlilar Stokes. She spent four years on and off the unit called segregation. I ended up busting my head open coming out of my cuffs. She's been diagnosed depressive bipolar. Says she grew up in poverty and joined a gang because she wanted to have the fancy things other kids did. She was convicted of three attempted murders, and in a moment of rage, aimed a gun at a girl, who survived. How close were you? How close were you? Couple of feet. When you pulled the trigger, what were you thinking? When you pulled the trigger, what were you thinking? (SCOFFS) I wasn't thinking. Did you think you'd killed her? Did you think you'd killed her? I don't know. I don't know. I just` It's` Have you ever had an out-of-body experience? Where you see yourself, but you're not actually there? You don't hear anything or smell anything. It's just, like, tunnel vision. That's how it was. At the end of her sentence, Sirlilar Stokes will be 69 years old. But there's something else you should know about the little girl in that picture. She was so bright she was singled out for scholarship money and said to a reporter she was excited at a better chance of college. What would you have been? What would you have studied? What would you have been? What would you have studied? Oh man, anaesthesiology. Why that? I just think I like meticulous things, so it would be something that would challenge my mind. She's on medicine and therapy now. A room full of books. And I wanna prove myself ` prove that I can be, that I've changed. And when she offers up her dream of freedom, it was not what we expected. The sweetest thing of freedom is to actually be able to be yourself. That's the sweetest thing of freedom. See, freedom is up here. To be in control of yourself. To be in control of yourself. Exactly. In Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison, he says, 'I am only but myself.' And when we reached out to the woman Sirlilar Stokes attempted to kill with that gun, she told us she believes in forgiveness. And warden Margaret Chippendale in Maryland says she thinks only a handful of prisoners are beyond change. Good morning, all. Good morning. 'I believe that the vast majority of the women in this institution 'are good people that could be returned to the community someday.' Good job. And if I don't believe that, I'm in the wrong profession. And if I don't believe that, I'm in the wrong profession. If it's punishment... First of all, I'm going to take the position that it's not my job to punish. The courts did that. ALL SING: # Let me see redemption win. And back in Tennessee, a volunteer choir director named Tina Hutchison says if you can't understand the prisoner, try to understand the struggle. They teach me more than I could ever teach them about what it is to survive, to endure. # I wanna know a song can rise # from the ashes of a broken life. # And all that's dead inside can be reborn. # I'm worn. # After the break ` death row. Two young women who had never spent a night in prison before now facing the reality they may never see the outside world again. It's life row. It's life row. Life row? Mm-hm. Mm-hm. Why? Cos we're not dying. We're living. Do you ever think, 'I might be executed'? Do you ever think, 'I might be executed'? No. You can't have that mentality. That means you've accepted this. That means you've accepted this. You've already` You've already died. That means you've accepted this. You've already` You've already died. Yeah. Welcome back. You are about to meet Tiffany and Emelia ` two young women who are neighbours on a notorious corridor ` death row. Both convicted of murder, they face paying the ultimate price ` a life for a life. So how did two girls who had never spent a night in prison before end up here? Ocala, Florida, at the Lowell Correctional Institution ` two young women come down the hall, waving, smiling together like girlfriends. Hi, Diane. How are you? They are Tiffany Cole, now 33; Emelia Carr, now 30. Two separate crimes; two separate lives, until they became neighbours on the notorious corridor. Do you call it death row? Do you call it death row? No, call it life row. Do you call it death row? No, call it life row. It's life row. Life row? Life row? Mm-hm. Why? Why? Cos we're not dying. We're living. Do you ever think, 'I might be executed'? Do you ever think, 'I might be executed'? No. You can't have that mentality. That means you've accepted it. That means you've accepted it. You've already` You've already died. That means you've accepted it. You've already` You've already died. You cannot have that mentality. Two women, neither of whom had ever spent a night in jail before, living a life so familiar. Tiffany played the flute in high school, cheerleading, girl scouts. Emelia ` book smart and says she modelled and was in the school marines. Both say they were sexually abused as children and both met the wrong guy. Tiffany says she barely knew her boyfriend. Three weeks. Three weeks. Three weeks? And had you ever been in trouble? And had you ever been in trouble? Mm-mm. It is hard to connect the face in these photos to the horrible crime committed with her boyfriend and his friends. Neighbours of her family first robbed, then buried alive in a grave. I didn't know what was coming, and that's all I'm gonna say about that. Her lawyer told the court Tiffany Cole thought the grave was for items they were stealing. He also talked about that sexual abuse by her father and her drugs, her mental and psychological problems. The jury saw a damning photo after the crime. They convicted her. I am not the same person any more. I have peace, I have joy, I have a sound mind. And Emelia, the youngest woman on death row, convicted of another horrifying murder ` helping her boyfriend suffocate his wife with duct tape and plastic bag. There is a police tape of Emelia after her boyfriend confessed. She's eight months pregnant with his child. He asked me to try helping him, but I was shaking so bad. She admits she was there, but says not when the wife was actually killed. Her lawyer argued there was no physical evidence that she'd even touched the duct tape. But when the judge gave her her sentence, he called her 'cold' and said, 'May God have mercy on your soul.' The duct tape, the asphyxiation. What do you feel? Nope? In what aspect? Like reflecting? Like reflecting? Yes. They say they are reluctant to talk details of the crimes because they're both appealing their sentences. It's hard to answer, because, like, I wasn't where all that happened. But looking back and thinking about what she had to go through, and, you know, what her family's enduring, is terrible. And they ask some questions of us about the justice system. A study estimates one in 25 people on death row is innocent of the crime, and 75% have no money for private lawyers. Emelia says she had no money, but her boyfriend hired a high-powered attorney. He got life, she got death. How many rich people are in prison? Seriously. Seriously. Seriously. Seriously. On death row, life sentences. We're all people who either are minorities or didn't have any` any money. Unfortunately, equality is an illusion. And before we leave, she has another question, this one about TV. I have a question. Why do you think there's such a desire to make women look so bad in the media? You know? They watch endless crime stories about women who kill. Like Jodi Arias. You know, that thing went huge. I don't understand. Why does America want so bad to feed off of this negativity? The young women get up to go back to their cells ` 24 hours a day except for the three times a week they're outside on concrete for two hours. In a different building, the chamber where Florida executes death row inmates. Across America, there have been five executions of women in the last decade. Another one scheduled for Monday. And when we contacted the victims' families in both these crimes, they told us they believe the death penalty is right. The women said they will go back to their books and their prayers. And praising God in the process, you know, and just showing people we're people. It's not over. There is forgiveness and there is hope. After the break ` freedom. How do those who have been locked up cope with life on the outside? It was nice knowing you. It was nice knowing you. Thank you very much. Just a few more steps. Gotta make it. I made it this far. Oh! Real air. (CHUCKLES) Real air. A lot of options, and I'm scared to make the bad ones. I'm scared to make the wrong ones. Welcome back. How do you prepare inmates who have been locked up for decades for a life on the outside? Well, one prison has a very unique philosophy, including their own version of Dancing With the Stars. 20/20 follows inmates as they make the transition. Will they be able to stay on the right side of the law? A 53-year-old woman, Betty Brown, is leaving prison after 29 years. The wardens say women age faster in prison. Am I scared? Am I afraid? Absolutely. Because I've been locked up such a long time. But I'm gonna be all right. America has an unprecedented number of older women serving long sentences in prison. Betty's blood pressure is high. She's on seizure medications. In for second-degree murder, she was a mentor over the years for Sirlilar Stokes. Oh, you're always crying! It's gonna be all right. Let me tell you something. The same way that I made it, you're gonna make it. This one prisoner has cost taxpayers more than a million dollars during her incarceration. And after all these years, Betty is taking with her $50, five boxes of books and a thank you for the warden. Ms Chippendale. Mister, I come to say it was nice knowing you. Thank you very much. Just a few more steps. I gotta make it. I made it this far. Oh! Real air. (CHUCKLES) Real air. Warden Chippendale has nearly 90 programmes in Maryland. Makes a difference when they leave? Makes a difference when they leave? I think it makes a huge difference. Experts say education reduces recidivism by 43%. Goucher College offers college in Maryland, but there's a waiting list. In addition to the programmes, Warden Chippendale says something else is important ` keeping a woman connected to humanity. Number one right here! Their big night ` the prison version of Dancing with the Stars. It's just like the TV show. You know, the wave. Prisoners with good behaviour can apply to compete. I practised, like, every day. Even in my cell. This inmate is really nervous. She's a older lady than me, so I was, like, 'Oh no! I cannot drop this lady!' So the officers bring the clothes, and look at the transformation. Before,... after. Before,... after. Inmates facing decades in prison as rock stars. I look at technique. I look at synchronisation and choreography. They dance, and the judges, who include the assistant warden and officers, vote. The prize ` some small things we might take for granted. Toothbrush, soap. The winner is the oldest contestant. She's 48. It makes me feel happy instead of being negative all the time. And so what is the recidivism rate in Maryland? 40.5% in 2012. The latest national rate is 68%. And I think it's because we've invested time, we've invested money and talent into providing resources for offenders. Hold up right there. But as we said, every state has a different philosophy. Tennessee believes prisoners should be rigidly controlled in how they walk and dress. The female offenders walk in a straight line. Hands out of pockets, and that's for a safety reason. They also have programmes in Tennessee, about 27 of them. And their recidivism rate here? The latest published data is from 2007. It's 46%. And while I'm there at Tennessee, I start talking to a prisoner who's about to be released. And then, um` And then, um` Excuse me. She has to be behind the barrier when she talks at the door. She'll have to be sitting with her feet there. Do you have a favourite book? Uh, I think Augusten Burroughs' Possible Side Effects. He wrote Running with Scissors. Yes. Yes. I love him. Mornin'. Later at breakfast, Jessie Thomas tells me about her medications ` Pamelor, Prozac, Tegretol ` for mental-health problems. One's for depression, one's for bipolar, and one's for, um,... anxiety and ADHD. She's in prison for theft and says she started using drugs as a teenager. Jessie also tells me she found a soulmate in prison, but her soulmate is in for 25 years. I love you. I love you. I love you. It's just a really healthy relationship. READS: To live is to suffer. To survive is to find meaning in the suffering. So on the day she walks out, she has $68, three T-shirts, a few notes from her girlfriend. And even though she's supposed to be given 14 days' of medication, she says she has nothing. A younger sister picks her up. Their first stop ` Taco Bell. Can I have a... cheesy gordita crunch... But the sister can only keep her one night. Jessie says she wrote to halfway houses, shelters, job centres, but two rejected her and the others didn't answer. In the car, a favourite song. # ...feel, feel like you still have a choice. # If we all light up, we can scare away the dark. # Starting fresh, starting over. I see it really overwhelming. On her first night free, she records a video diary. A lot of options, and I'm scared to make the bad ones. I'm scared to make the wrong ones, so I don't wanna make any. I don't know what to do to distract myself. The only thing I've ever really done is really just get high. Maybe I'll get some sleep. Maybe I'll just lay here and think about sleeping. PENSIVE MUSIC Experts say the first month out of prison is the most important. Jessie says it was nine days after she walked out that she finally got her medication, and she's already missed 20 doses. She got a job washing dishes, but 34 days after her release, police charged Jessie with robbing two pharmacies to get money for street drugs. Tonight Jessie is back in jail. Heartbreaking, eh? Next week ` the movie scene that turned into a real-life horror. How did it turn so bad on set?