UPBEAT PIANO MUSIC Captions by Glenna Casalme. www.able.co.nz Captions were made possible with funding from NZ On Air. Copyright Able 2015 MUSIC SWELLS MUSIC QUIETENS, ENDS HAUNTING MUSIC EERIE PIANO MUSIC BIRDSONG SOMBRE MUSIC We just finished church, Mum. Happy Mother's Day. When Mum was alive, whatever she said, she was the boss, you know? But when she died, I became the boss. I wanted to get cremated, get my ashes thrown on top of Mum, put a rose, and I'll come back as a rose each year. You look at your lifestyle and the food, like that, and you go from, um, three pig heads down to one pig head and like that, and` and the blood still reads the same, eh. Go away, fly. I'm not dead yet. Huh. JAUNTY MUSIC Boxer is in the late stages of type II diabetes. I went to the doctors nine times some years, 10 years before. 'Oh, you` you've a bit of diabetes, you know?' 'Oh, yeah?' And so I have to do these things even when I don't like it. But I do it in such a way that I don't take time off to do it. If you take time off to go and do it, that's dumb. You won't do it. But if you're` if you're sitting there and watching TV, stand up behind your seat and pump it up, and when you` when you get tired, pull the seat back and quickly sit down before you fall down. JAUNTY GUITAR AND WHISTLING MUSIC 10 years ago, Boxer was in a bad way. He was nearly blind. His kidneys were failing. His legs had turned black and were about to be amputated. He had to make a change. If somebody told me that I'll be like this now, I couldn't believe it. Uh, but you had to go walk that road first, and you got to end here. GENTLE GUITAR MUSIC Paul Hayter is lucky to be alive. He's had type II diabetes for 26 years. REFLECTIVE GUITAR MUSIC Come on. I was 165 kilos ` fat, lazy, didn't wanna walk anywhere. That said, I should've been dead. And even after that, I just didn't believe I had it. Yeah. I just thought, 'Oh, yeah, I'll get over this.' You know? This used to be as far as I could go, but today I think I can make it to the top. I've had my children on my back and telling me to do it properly for a little while now. I mean, hopefully I won't, you know, fall off and do the wrong things again. When Paul's wife died, he became depressed. He put on so much weight, he couldn't stand up on his own. No wonder I live here, eh? Look at the beautiful scene. # Looks like I made it. # It's great to get up here. I think about... (VOICE BREAKS) my wife. (SNIFFLES) I think about all my family... and how they all believe in me. (SOBS) You have to understand what he's trying to deal with in his mind. (CHUCKLES) I saw it, um, kick him in the shins a bit like he's failing. Mm-hm. Doubt and fear. His favourite word was, 'I can't.' His moods would be up and down a lot. You could see him suffering emotionally. You could see him frustrated at himself for doing it. VOICE BREAKS: But he just couldn't get out of that hole. UPBEAT UKULELE MUSIC HUBBUB, INDISTINCT SHOUTING, MEN EXCLAIM I was a band player. I played in bands. I worked during the day, all day, and I played from 7 o'clock at night till, uh, half past 1 in the morning, you know? And gone home, hopped into bed, slept for three hours and went back to work. There's no work in the country, and you've gotta send all your kids away. So six of my boys live in Australia and working there. And my one daughter, she stays in our house in Otara. PLAYERS TALK LOUDLY The only thing I have a problem with is the European dietician. I said, 'I don't eat your food. I just don't go near it,' you know? I said, 'You get my` all my Maori food, and that's it. Tell me how much kina I can eat, 'how much mussels, how much paua I can eat, how much crayfish. That's the food I eat.' You know? And... And she said` And she goes, 'Right. Oh, I haven't done a study like that,' and I said, 'Well, I'm a Maori.' You know, you can't just` like a Chinese ethnic ` you can't say, 'No more rice.' You don't know nothing about rice. And I said, 'And I agree, I have Maori, fried bread, rewena bread.' All the bread you can eat. OIL SIZZLES That's what I had for, uh, tea last night. Uh, but the whole frame, but with the head. Uh, it were a Pak'n Save head. Our national diet. Yeah. > Fried bread. You want? At all the maraes` and I think this is on the table all the time. You` You're` You're allowed to eat about three of those. But you can't go and eat 20 of them. You'll end up in a wheelchair ` minus a leg. Everything in moderation. Everything in moderation, eh? We'd like to be healthier, but it's more flavour, I think. < Yeah. Yeah. It's after-function, uh, kai, uh, for the people and for the players. Every hui up here is a cultural thing of having a kai at the same time, eh. UPBEAT UKULELE MUSIC CHILDREN SHOUT PEOPLE CHEER UKULELE MUSIC CONTINUES HUBBUB CHILD: Come on, Papa! BIRDSONG RAIN PATTERS We're, um, testing my bloods to find my level of sugar in my body. I do it three times a day. It just has to be done. CLICK! If I don't do that, well, it could affect my kidneys and have kidney damage and lose your limbs. 9.8. Must be nearly lunchtime. (INHALES) Before, I... You know, I was always high, and I had no real control when... Didn't know how much insulin I was taking` supposed to take and, yeah, until I moved home and then... I decided to change my life. AMUSING MUSIC When I was in Auckland, I just wanted to come home to be with the wairua up here, in the peace, in the quiet and serenity. Yeah, it's magic up here. And it did a lot for my mind. It means that, um,... I'm at peace. I hate lettuce. But I have to eat it. AMUSING MUSIC CONTINUES In an effort to turn Paul's life around, his daughter Letitia and her husband moved up north with him. Are you making lunch, Dad? Yup. Um, what are you having? Just this. Um, where's the cucumber? When we first moved home, I would make all the sandwiches to make sure that he got all his nutrition in. Um, so now, four months into it, he has to make his own. (CHUCKLES) I'm eating healthier now, and it's not really a burden. When we go into town, I still see Dad wanting to sneak stuff ` some pies and deep-fried stuff. Just sometimes can't control the urge. I used to get really worked up about it because we sacrificed so much to come home and to help him every day. And just trying to encourage him. Rather than getting on his back about making the wrong choice, encourage him to make a better choice. It was a big decision with my husband and I to move back to the wop wops. In Auckland, I couldn't give everything I could to him, because I was always working. Everything that I've seen since being home has reassured me that it was the best decision we've made. Please hear me, Father. Lord, we are truly grateful for this wonderful day, and we're especially grateful for this food. I was a hopeless diabetic. I didn't really know the... the outcomes of my habits, and it was pretty sad, cos I could've just killed myself by not doing it. He needs to live. We've already buried our mum. I don't want to bury our dad. You know, he cho` He was choosing to f... to not do anything at that time. And to me, that wasn't a good enough reason. CURIOUS MUSIC Christina Morunga is the only diabetes nurse for miles. 90% of people with diabetes don't have any symptoms. And so, 'Well, I feel fine. So why would I be worrying about me 'when all these other things need attention?' With diabetes, you can feel really well. So trying to explain to people that, 'You've got a condition that's causing problems to your organs.' 'But I feel fine. How does that relate?' We have a free medical area in Hokianga, and so we're able to see more people because people will come before there's a problem rather than waiting for the complications of diabetes before they seek help. Boxer was diagnosed with diabetes some years ago when he had complications. So he's had to really work at getting his health right. So I said to him, 'Well, Boxer, if you don't do something about your diabetes, 'you're gonna be dead within a few years. And you've got your mokopuna here. 'You need to be, you know, around for them.' He was really upset at that thought, so Boxer started doing stuff, and he shows a way that it can be done so that he can still be healthy with his disability. Kia ora. Kia ora! (SPEAKS MAORI) Kaore i te pai. This is 121` Oh, double` 122.2 So it's 148 down to 122. Yeah. Yeah. That's a huge change. For somebody who is at end-stage re` kidney failure, you actually are very healthy. You guys have cracked it. You've really got on top of the diabetes. Yep. You're organised with the dialysis. Yes. And I'm just so impressed with how you have actually pulled through those really hard times. < We had our bad times. There was times I used to scream and yell at him and throw things at him. But you hung in there` < Yes, I did. ...and that's just so awesome. To hear that, 'You're not long on the life support` oh, on the dialysing machine; 'that only keeps you alive temporary,' and it sort of really got to me. Mm-hm. It, um, got that bad where I was going to see someone < that I could talk to about what I was going through. I wanted her to get my gun and shoot that one first and shoot that one second. Now you feel better. (CHUCKLES) Yeah, and that's how he used to talk all the time. Yeah. > You know, 'Get the gun and shoot me in the legs and... shoot me in the head and all that.' Yeah, I wasn't suicidal, but the` the pain` It was just the pain. The pain was so, uh, much to take. Yeah, we've` we've come a long way. We have. (PATS CHRISTINE'S BACK) Mm. Mm! BOXER: Yeah, ka kite. Paul has his bad days, and he has his good days. If he can keep his sugars where they are, there's not much likelihood of him needing dialysis. Kia ora, Paul. Good to see you. How've you been? Good, thank you. All right? Yeah. So, show me your book. How's your blood sugar's been doing? Oh, up and down. Well, mostly down. Mostly down? Mostly the right way. OK. So here we are today. Pretty good. Look at this ` right down to 6.7 Yeah. Yeah, the time there, it was a bit more high. But this was great up here. So what happened in this time, Paul? I was in Auckland. Oh, yeah? OK. So... And I was eating the wrong food. Uh-huh. And I knew I was doing it, but I couldn't stop, cos I was in Auckland, in town. That's why I like it up here. Yeah. Cos you don't go to the shop, you know? Yes. So you're not tempted. Not tempted. So if you carry on with your weight reduction, like you're doing, cos you've lost 12kg this year already,... Yeah. ...you are... going to need less insulin. And the less insulin you have, the less hungry you'll be. And therefore the more weight you'll be able to lose. You won't get right off insulin, but, hey, you're gonna be able to reduce it right down. One of my goals is to get my insulin levels down,... you know? So I can... be more active and... look after my mokopuna when they all arrive. I wanna be around for them` Definitely. ...you know? Cos... You know,... they lost their grandmother, so... the best thing I can do is stay around for them. Yes. Yeah. So that was` That's the biggest motivation for me ` is to get on track. EERIE DRONING MUSIC SOMBRE PIANO MUSIC MACHINE HISSES This is what I do every other night ` set his machine up and, um, get him ready to go on. SOMBRE PIANO MUSIC CONTINUES It` It... Basically, it's an artificial kidney. But the difference ` your goes 24-7; this goes only six hours. And so if I dialyse every second day, that means I can carry on a normal life. And so I do it at night-time so I can get my daytimes all to myself. I've been dialysing now for, um, uh, six years. I'm on a waiting list for a kidney. I wasn't on a waiting list for the first three years of dialysis, cos I was too fat, too heavy, and I had complications. And then after that, I` I developed and learned how to live with it. The weight came down. I came within the parameters of` of having a kidney. I've been on it for the last, um, three years, waiting for a kidney now. The machine is just, um, keeping me alive and keeping me fit. I eat the right stuff and look after myself ` keep my exercises up so I can be strong. So when I do get a kidney, I can stand the operation. Yeah. If you're not fit, they're not gonna operate. That's really a waste of time. You drop dead. Yeah. Just happy to be alive and fit. There's a lot of guys that... they're struggling, yeah. GENTLE, UPLIFTING MUSIC This is my newest garden I've planted. Getting ready for the winter. I've always been big. They would always say it was cos I had my dad's genes. But I can't use it as an excuse any more. Am I on a healthier path? Have I made conscious decisions today for my health tomorrow? I planted six, and I've got six growing, so I'm pretty proud of myself. (CHUCKLES) So here's our tamarillos. Mum planted these trees. And we've got red ones and orange ones. And this is rerihu. It's a... It's a delicacy in our culture. It's a beautiful green. It's nice in boil-ups. Boil-ups aren't that good, apparently, but if you have lean meat and lots of greens, it's really good for you. When you're in the city, there's so many takeaways; there's so many fast-food outlets that, um, just make it easier to not cook good food, or... there's no time to do the shopping. Things like that. So... I just love being home and being able to go to my supermarket outside and get what I need from the garden that I've grown and I actually had to dig. So there's some free cardio. (GIGGLES) (BABBLES, SQUEALS) We're doing it ` me and my husband ` cos we wanna be able to have children. I don't wanna not have children because I didn't overcome a weakness. Yay! Ano. Ano. PLAYFUL MUSIC These gardens, I just planted this one last week. And they're just like this. And I just... I use my paua shell for, uh... for weeding. You don't have to bend down in this garden. You feed the plants, and they feed you. And it's good` good therapy. Now, this is pua here. And growing in amongst the, uh` my lettuce seeds that I just threw in. That's a good feed. That's a good feed. And it's not nicked pua either. (CHUCKLES) FUN MUSIC This is the home` home orchard here. Uh, it's got two trees of 20 varieties of different plums, four lots of different pears, uh, six lots of feijoas, guavas. It` It feeds all my kids and anybody else that think they can eat a lot of plums. It feeds them, feeds our community and our kids, and at times it feeds the football players. The orange now... Like in the wintertime, when they come up here, they stop here, fill about two bags of, um, oranges; they go off to football. All right, Dad. Defend your title, boy. Yeah, boy. (LAUGHS) You know, it's ridiculous ` you can go into a supermarket and pay $3 for a lettuce, but you pay $1 for a packet of chips. That's something that needs to change for our country. We're struggling on a normal household budget to accommodate the nutritious needs of our children. PLAYFUL MUSIC (PANTS) Yeah, this is` this is the barn house, we call it. Um, made it like this, where all my kids come home, there's plenty of room. Teach all of my mokopunas to eat the whole range of kai. The ones that won't eat, they sit beside me. Yeah, and then you tempt them with a big ice cream in one plate, 'And if you eat all of that, you get this. 'You don't eat that, I'll give this one to the pig.' All of them tend to wanna eat rathers` They all wanna eat, um, uh, Rashuns and potato chips, eh. Up here, they eat what I eat. Yeah. There's no K Fries up here, my boy. We` We have three deep freezers. There's two out there. And there's about a whole cow in, out there and about a half a cow in here. But it's got roast beef, roast things. It's got prawns. We've got the wife's ice cream in here. Everything. What's that I hear about ice cream? Oh, she's got ice cream in here. I don't. She eats those. He goes to the marae, and his nurse rings him out and says, 'Christine, his blood sugar, 'it's over-something. It's way over above.' And I said, 'Linda, he eats at the marae.' She goes, 'Well, next time he goes to the marae, Christine, slap him out on his forehead and say, 'Don't feed this monkey` monkey pudding. So that's what I do.' (LAUGHS SOUNDLESSLY) How many are you gonna do? 20? He's wanting to be happier. He's in control of his diabetes; he's looking after himself; he's talking a lot more to people. It's been small steps. He didn't just go from being super depressed to being magically awakened. It's... It's been learning and growing every day. Even though it's in the chair, it's still good work, because before, he never even used to be able to get out of low chairs. Like, he would struggle like he's an 80-old... 80-year-old man. It's... paying off. You're doing all right, Dad. For Dad, he kind of didn't see what his purpose was any more, what was his role in the family. His kids take care of him. They sort everything out, and Dad just gets to do... have nothing to do, really. So... helping him see that, uh, 'Hello! (CHUCKLES) You can still be our dad.' (LAUGHS) (PLAYS LIVELY BEAT) I've become a pin-up person. You go to Whangarei Hospital, and you can see it on the lift ` 'Keep fit the Boxer way.' You know, I just get my seat while I'm watching TV, and this is all I do. I just sit up, and I just go like this. Just go like that. You start off with little squats like that, hanging on to the seat for balance, and you just bend them around till you can go right down a little bit, and up. And that's life. (PANTS SOFTLY) And just keep doing it. And as you progress down, you start` you can go down without touching anything. Then one day, you` you find you can reach the ground. You can reach the ground. They're only little things, but they're enough. Start standing on your toes. And when you get tired, you hurry back to your seat and you lift your legs off the ground. That's the one. And you can do that anywhere. In church. I do it in church. At the marae, do it. Pull my legs and push off the ground. Push them down, pull the heels together, squeeze tight, relax. (PLAYS EASY-GOING TUNE) (CONTINUES PLAYING) And Maori don't` before never looked after themselves; they just... Life's too good to worry about looking after yourself. 'A te wa, ka mate we.' They just` 'In time, we're all gonna die.' I'm gonna get run over by a train. That's what I see. That's how I'm gonna die. So I live in Panguru, and there's no trains here, so I'm gonna live a long time. PLAYFUL MUSIC Thank you. He didn't really have any goals at first, so I just told him to think of his grandchild ` picture what she's doing in two years' time, and is he there with her? Is he playing with her? He cried. He... Because the person he saw, I believe, wasn't the man he wanted to be. But... a weakness has to be mastered. You have to master your weaknesses, and it means work and dedication and constant commitment, and it's great. (CHUCKLES) But, yeah, it is hard. I'm feeling great cos I'm way ahead of what I was. Don't have sugary foods; don't have drinks with sugar. Yeah, just keep off the sugar, mainly. Doing heaps better now. I didn't come home to be his personal maid. He has to do it. Well, he's not just gonna lie in bed all day. (CHUCKLES) He has to get up and do everything that he can. And as soon as I hear him say the word 'I can't,' I try and understand why he thinks he can't and try and help him. Cos when you show them the more that they can, then they just get more and more confident. It makes every sacrifice worthwhile when you just see him smiling and doing. I love it. (CHUCKLES) It's the greatest feeling inside that you can feel. It's good to have a look back. You can see how much you've actually done. Nominations for the 8th Annual Attitude Awards are now open. For information and entry forms, go to attitudelive.com/awards. It's great to be in an audience where people are talking about ability and not disability. Copyright Able 2015