THEY'RE THE HIGH POINT OF EVERY DECENT PLAYGROUND, BUT IT TURNS OUT SLIDES ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR A COUPLE OF THOUSAND INJURIES EVERY YEAR. AND THE LATEST STATS FROM ACC SHOW IT'S NOT JUST THE LITTLE ONES WHO ARE COMING A CROPPER. THEY'VE BEEN AROUND SINCE ADAM WAS IN KNICKERBOCKERS. ALLOWING US TO DEFY GRAVITY FROM DIZZYING HEIGHTS. ALLOWING US TO DEFY GRAVITY FROM DIZZYING HEIGHTS. EVEN THE SMALL BOYS ENJOYED THEM. SOME OF US CAN REMEMBER GETTING SPLINTERS IN UNMENTIONABLE PLACES OR SCORCHING OUR BUMS ON THE HOT METAL IN SUMMER. BUT ACC STATS SHOW THERE ARE OTHER OUCH POINTS. MOST CLAIMS ARE FOR FACIAL INJURIES, AND WHILE 1500 ARE FOR THOSE UNDER 15, THERE'S ARE FAIR FEW IN THE MID-30s TO 40s, AND EVEN A DECENT SMATTERING AMONGST OUR SENIORS. AH, THAT LOOKS MORE RELAXING. IS THIS A SLIPPERY SLOPE INDEED? AND ACC'S INJURY PREVENTION MANAGER JAMES WHITAKER IS HERE NOW. NICE TO SEE YOU, JAMES. I'M SURPRISED BY THE INJURIES IN OLDER PEOPLE. WHAT DO YOU THINK'S GOING ON THERE? IS THAT NANA HAVING A SNEAKY GO AT THE PARK? IT COULD BE. IT COULD BE MUM, DAD, NANA, WHOEVER THE CAREGIVER IS ACTUALLY HAVING FUN WITH THEIR KIDS AND SHOWING THEM HOW IT'S DONE, MAYBE? OR MAYBE SHOWING THEM HOW THEY SHOULDN'T DO IT IF THEY'RE GETTING INJURED. NOW, I'M SURE YOU DON'T WANT TO BE THE FUN POLICE BECAUSE KIDS DO NEED TO PLAY. HOW DO WE BALANCE THAT WITH SAFETY CONCERNS? YOU'RE RIGHT. WE WANT EVERYBODY IN NEW ZEALAND TO LIVE AMAZING LIVES RIGHT? WHERE THEY DO GIVE THINGS A GO, AND THAT INCLUDES KIDS. THE BEST THING TO DO IS JUST TO TEACH KIDS WHEN THEY'RE REALLY YOUNG, HOW TO IDENTIFY RISK AND HOW TO DEAL WITH THAT RISK, AND DON'T MAKE A MASSIVE THING OF IT, YOU KNOW, JUST ENCOURAGE THEM TO HAVE A 'HMM...' AND THEN LET THEM GO. ALSO, DO KEEP AN EYE ON THEM, BUT ACTUALLY LET THEM EXPERIMENT. ALSO, DO KEEP AN EYE ON THEM, BUT ACTUALLY LET THEM EXPERIMENT. LET THEM GET STUCK INTO THINGS AND THEN STEP IN IF IT LOOKS LIKE SOMETHING COULD ACTUALLY HAPPEN. AND ALSO, IF YOUR CHILD IS A BIT NERVOUS AND THEY'RE UP AT THE TOP OF THE SLIDE AND THEY'RE KIND OF GOING, 'OH, WHAT DO I DO?'. JUST ASK THEM, YOU KNOW, WHAT COULD STOP YOU FROM HAVING FUN? AND HOW CAN YOU MAKE SURE YOU DO HAVE FUN AND THEY'LL FIGURE IT OUT WITH YOU? SO WE KNOW THAT HELICOPTER PARENTING IS NOT A GREAT IDEA, BUT ARE THERE SOME NO-NO'S WHEN IT COMES TO SLIDES? YEAH, THERE'S SOME REAL BASIC TIPS. SO FIRST OF ALL, GO DOWN ONE-PERSON-AT-A-TIME, INSTEAD OF JAMMING IN TOGETHER, AND THAT CAN PREVENT A WHOLE LOT OF INJURIES FROM HAPPENING. ANOTHER THING THAT CAN HAPPEN IS IF PEOPLE HAVE LOOSE ITEMS OF CLOTHING THAT CAN GET CAUGHT AND CAUSE PEOPLE TO TWIST AND MAYBE EVEN FALL OFF. SO, YOU KNOW, YOU DON'T WANT TO DO THAT EITHER. I SEE THE WEST COAST IS AH, VERY LOW IN THE DATA. ARE THEY MORE COORDINATED OR DO THEY BOUNCE? THEY MIGHT BE WAY MORE COORDINATED. THERE MIGHT BE SOMETHING IN THEIR DNA OR SOMETHING, OR MAYBE THEY'RE INTO OTHER THINGS AND SLIDES JUST DON'T DO IT FOR THEM. NOW, JAMES, WE'VE GOT A SMALL SLIDE IN THE STUDIO. WHILE WE'VE GOT YOU, - IF HILLARY WERE TO USE IT, - NICE! WOULD SHE BE COVERED BY ACC IF THERE, HYPOTHETICALLY, JUST HAPPENED TO BE A MISHAP? SHE WOULD, SHE WOULD, YEAH. LOOK, WE COVER PEOPLE WHEN THEY NEED IT, BUT IT'S WAY BETTER FOR EVERYONE, INCLUDING HILLARY AND HER WHANAU IF SHE DOESN'T GET INJURED. SO HILLARY, DO HAVE A 'HMM...', THINK THINGS THROUGH AND DO IT THE SMART WAY. JEREMY, DON'T GO DOWN WITH HER. GO ONE-BY-ONE, OK? LIKE THERE IS NO WAY HE'S COMING DOWN WITH ME! (WHISPERS) I'D LOVE TO DO THAT! THANK YOU SO MUCH, JAMES. LOVELY TO SEE YOU. NO WORRIES, THANK YOU. THIS IS GOOD THE SLIDE, WATCH THIS. OH LORDY YOUR STUCK OH NO IT REALLY IS COLLAPSING IT'S AN OLD CLICHE TO SAY 'LIFE'S A DRAG' BUT FOR NICK HALL, IT'S A REALITY. HE'S FOUND FAME AS HIS BEDAZZLED, HIGH HEELED ALTER EGO, ANITA WIGLIT. CAMERA OPERATOR TORY EVANS CAPTURED A DAY IN THE LIFE... OF A DRAG QUEEN. FOR ME, THE ESSENCE OF DRAG IS THAT PURPOSE IN LIFE IS TO ADD COLOUR AND JOY TO AN ENVIRONMENT. IT'S CALLED, WELL, THE NECESSARILY EASIEST FOR A PERSON LIKE ME, AS YOU CAN IMAGINE, BEING GAY. I WAS REALLY INTO THE CREATIVE SIDE OF THINGS ACTING, MUSIC, AND MY SCHOOL WAS A RUGBY SCHOOL, AND SO I WAS BULLIED A LOT FOR BEING DIFFERENT, AND I THINK THAT THAT'S WHERE I DEVELOPED A SENSE OF HUMOUR. MY NAME IS NICK HALL, BETTER KNOWN AS THE DRAG QUEEN PERSONALITY, ANITA WIGLIT. ANITA WIGLIT IS THIS CHARACTER I CREATED, WHICH WAS KIND OF LIKE THE, UM, LIKE THE FUN AUNT. BASICALLY SOMEBODY WHO DIDN'T REALLY FIT IN, WHO WAS A BIT KOOKY, A BIT WILD, AND JUST A GOOD TIME. AND I FEEL LIKE IT'S ALMOST AN EXTENSION OF MYSELF. NEVER REALLY FIT IN, SO TO SPEAK. BUT, UM, WAS A VEHICLE TO MAKE OTHER PEOPLE LAUGH AND FOR OTHER PEOPLE TO ENJOY THEMSELVES. I FIRST DISCOVERED DRAG IN 2008, WHEN I WAS AN USHER AT THE CIVIC THEATRE. THE FIRST MUSICAL WE HAD WAS PRISCILLA, QUEEN OF THE DESERT, AND I WAS SO INSPIRED THAT I THOUGHT, I KIND OF WANNA GIVE DRAG A GO. SO I DID DRAG. MY 21ST BIRTHDAY, I HAD A DRAG PRISCILLA-THEMED 21ST BIRTHDAY PARTY, AND THE REST IS HISTORY. LET US PULL UP A CHAIR AS A COMMUNITY PROUDLY PRESENTS YOUR DRAG QUEENS. # BE MY GUEST. BE MY GUEST. PUT OUR SERVICE TO THE TEST. # TIE YOUR NAPKIN AROUND YOUR NECK, DARLING. # WE'LL PROVIDE THE REST. I WAS THINKING THAT BEING A DRAG QUEEN IS ACTUALLY QUITE SIMILAR TO I WAS THINKING THAT BEING A DRAG QUEEN IS ACTUALLY QUITE SIMILAR TO BEING A GEISHA, BUT THEY HAD TO ENTERTAIN PEOPLE. WE GO INTO ROOMS, AND OUR JOB IS TO TALK WITH PEOPLE AND, AND KIND OF MAKE THEM ENJOY A PARTY MORE. WE ALSO SOMETIMES DO PERFORMANCES LIKE A GEISHA WOULD MAYBE PLAY AN INSTRUMENT, WHEREAS WE WOULD DO A LIP-SYNC SHOW. AND TO BE HONEST, AT THE END OF A BIRTHDAY PARTY OR SOMETHING, PEOPLE WILL FORGET EVERYTHING ABOUT THE PARTY, BUT THEY WILL REMEMBER THAT THERE WAS A DRAG QUEEN THERE. WAS THAT THE FIRST TIME YOU'VE HAD BALLS ON YOUR FACE? NO! (LAUGHTER) THE PEOPLE COME TO KLUTZY AND THEY GO, 'OH, WE HAD THE BEST TIME!'. PART OF THAT, I THINK, IS BECAUSE PEOPLE HAVE BEEN DRINKING AND YOU ALWAYS HAVE THE BEST TIME WHEN YOU'RE DRINKING, BUT, UM, IT'S JUST THAT THING. IT'S JUST SO MEMORABLE, JUST TO SEE A DRAG QUEEN. IT'S JUST SO, UH, ALMOST BIZARRE THAT YOU JUST KIND OF YOU COMMIT IT TO YOUR MEMORY. # BE MY GUEST # WE'RE KIND OF THE MOST NOTICEABLE IN THE RAINBOW COMMUNITY. WE KIND OF HAVE THE LOUDEST VOICE BECAUSE OF THAT. UH, DO I WANT TO BE AN ACTIVIST? TO BE HONEST, NOT REALLY. I MEAN, I'LL ALWAYS STAND UP WITH SOMEONE WITH A CAUSE, OR IF I BELIEVE IN SOMETHING, OF COURSE I WANT TO PROTECT THOSE AS I WAS BULLIED. I WANT TO PROTECT THOSE WHO ARE BEING BULLIED. AND IT'S IN MY NATURE TO BE CARING ABOUT PEOPLE. BUT HONESTLY, I WANT TO BE AN ENTERTAINER. THAT'S WHAT I WANT TO DO. I WANT TO BE A COMEDIAN. I WANT TO MAKE PEOPLE LAUGH. I WANT TO GIVE JOY. I WANT TO MAKE TV SHOWS AND GO ON THE STAGE, GO ON TOURS, TRAVEL THE WORLD WITH SHOWING THE WORLD THAT NEW ZEALAND'S OWN UNIQUE BRAND OF DRAG, BUT UNFORTUNATELY, THAT'S NOT WHERE MY CARDS LAY AT THE MOMENT, AND PART OF MY JOB IS TO PROTECT OTHERS, UH, AS A HUMAN. ARE YOU EXCITED FOR SOME RAINBOW STORIES TODAY? WHAT? YOU'RE SO RICH. WHAT ARE YOU GONNA BUY? HI, KEDAR, AND MY NAME'S ANITA. - HI! - YAY! FIRST OF ALL, WE ARE SO EXCITED TO BE BACK AT AUCKLAND MUSEUM, SO CAN WE GIVE IT A BIG ROUND OF APPLAUSE FOR AUCKLAND MUSEUM FOR HAVING US? YAY! RAINBOW STORY-TIME IS SO IMPORTANT, AND WE'RE GONNA SHARE SOME AMAZING STORIES ABOUT THINGS LIKE BEING KIND TO EACH OTHER. OH... WHY DO WE ONLY COME ONCE A YEAR? WHY DO WE ONLY COME ONCE A YEAR? WELL, LIKE, FATHER CHRISTMAS? (LAUGHS) ALTHOUGH I SHAVED MY BEARD TODAY. THIS ONE'S CALLED PRINCE AND KNIGHT. OOH! OOH! OH, BEAUTIFUL RESPONSE. THANK YOU EVERYBODY. # I WOULDN'T WANT TO BE ANYBODY ELSE, HEY # THERE'S A LITTLE NOTE AND IT SAYS 'TO THOSE WHO ARE FACING SCARIER FOES AND DRAGONS... IN THE FIGHT FOR LOVE'. OOH, THAT'S QUITE TOPICAL. I WOULD MOST LOVE TO SIT DOWN FOR TEA WITH BARBRA STREISAND, BUT... (LAUGHS) IF I HAD TO DO SOMEONE MORE LOCALLY AND MORE TOPICAL, IT WOULD BE BRIAN TAMAKI. WHICH IS, GRANTED, A WEIRD CHOICE, BUT, UM, I FEEL THAT BRIAN TAMAKI HAS SO MANY OPINIONS ABOUT ME AND WHAT I DO, AND YET ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA OF WHAT I DO, SO I'D LOVE TO MEET WITH HIM FOR A CUP OF TEA, UH, TO TALK ABOUT WHAT IT IS THAT I DO IN MY LIFE, ABOUT, ABOUT ME BEING A CHRISTIAN AND ABOUT MY IDEAS ABOUT CHRISTIANITY VERSUS HIS ONES, AND TO SHOW REALLY, MY LIFE. YOU DON'T HAVE TO FIT IN, BUT WHAT MAKES YOU NOT FIT IN IS YOUR SUPERPOWER. # YOU WANNA BE ANYBODY ELSE # AT THE END OF THE DAY, I THINK IT'S ALWAYS IMPORTANT TO REMEMBER THAT YOU CAN BE THE RAINBOW IN SOMEONE ELSE'S CLOUD. # I KNOW, BEAUTY QUEEN, I'M JUST BEAUTIFUL # # NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH # NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH # IF YOU WERE WATCHING AT THE START OF THE WEEK WE GAVE AWAY OUR FIRST FORD RANGER TO LANDSAR SOUTHLAND, A VERY DESERVING GROUP, AND WE'VE ACTUALLY OPENED OUR COMPETITION TO WIN A SECOND FORD RANGER TONIGHT! WE ARE LOOKING FOR AN OUTSTANDING NEW ZEALAND GROUP OR AN INDIVIDUAL WHO YOU THINK, DESERVES A SHINY NEW FORD RANGER. SIMPLY HEAD TO www.winwithsevensharp.co.nz TO ENTER. THIS IS ALL THANKS TO FORD. E WHAI AKE NEI ` COMING UP AFTER THE BREAK ` IT'S THE FRIDAY COUNTDOWN. PLUS ` YOU JUST LOOK INTO HIS EYES, AND IT'S LIKE HE'S READING WHAT'S GOING ON IN YOUR` IN YOUR WORLD. WE'RE THERE FOR A VERY BIG DAY FOR THIS GENTLE GIANT, WHO'S SPENT HIS LIFE HELPING THOSE BATTLING SERIOUS ILLNESS. NAU MAI, HOKI MAI, WELCOME BACK. LOVELY TO HAVE YOU WITH US. WE KNOW DOGS CAN HELP DETECT CANCER, WITH THEIR INCREDIBLE SENSE OF SMELL. BUT THEY CAN ALSO EASE THE LOAD FOR THOSE WHO ARE FIGHTING IT. RACHEL PARKIN WENT ALONG FOR A VERY SPECIAL DAY ON CHRISTCHURCH HOSPITAL'S ONCOLOGY WARD. (GENTLE MUSIC) WEIGHING IN AT 55KG, HE'S AS BIG AS HE IS SWEET. HE'S A VERY GENTLE SOUL. HE'S THE SORT OF DOG THAT YOU LOOK INTO HIS EYES, AND IT'S LIKE HE'S READING WHAT'S GOING ON IN YOUR WORLD. BUT MOVEMENT IS GETTING HARDER FOR BLAKE. HE'S GOT A FEW NIGGLES? YEP, OLD AGE (CHUCKLES) AT 8 YEARS OLD, THE LOVELY LEONBERGER'S GETTING ON FOR HIS BREED, HE IS. HE IS A SENIOR DOG, NOW. SORT OF 8 TO 10 LIFE EXPECTANCY. AND AS A DOG BUILT FOR SNOW - HE RUNS HOT. BASICALLY ANYTHING OVER 16 DEGREES WE FIND HE STRUGGLES WITH NOW, JUST WITH HIS AGE AND HIS INSANE COAT. INSANE, ALL RIGHT. BLAKE'S DAY IS BUSY ENOUGH WHAT WITH WALKIES... ...APPOINTMENTS... WE DO HYDRO THERAPY, AND LASER, AND PHYSIO AND MASSAGE. NOT TO MENTION KEEPING LITTLE SISTER PIPPA IN LINE... AND FOR THE PAST TWO YEARS WITH ANOTHER SPECIAL JOB... WE ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT HE NEEDED A PURPOSE IN LIFE. (JAZZ MUSIC) ONCE A WEEK, BLAKE AND SARAH HEADING INTO CHRISTCHURCH HOSPITAL'S ONCOLOGY WARD. SO THIS IS BLAKE. SO HE'S 8, WHICH IS 68 IN HUMAN YEARS, WE'VE WORKED OUT. YOU'VE GOT THE FEET TODAY... EH, ALL 55 KILOS OF IT. ROUND HERE LIFE CAN FEEL HEAVY TOO. BUT ALL YOU SEE WHEN BLAKE'S ON DECK ARE SMILES. FROM WAITING ROOM TO WAITING ROOM... BLAKE IS 8 AND A LEONBERGER. (CHUCKLES) AND HE'S TIRED... (CHUCKLES) ...AND ALL THE SPOTS IN BETWEEN, BLAKE SLOWLY BUT SURELY DOING HIS THING. OH, BLAKE IS JUST A LOVELY SPECIAL BOY. FOR OUR PATIENTS, I THINK... IT'S JUST A GOOD DISTRACTION FOR THEM AS WELL. IT CAN HELP EASE THEIR ANXIETY. I THINK IT CHANGES THE ENVIRONMENT, TENDS TO TAKE SOME OF THE 'CLINICAL-NESS' AWAY. A DISTRACTION NOT JUST FOR PATIENTS, BUT STAFF IN EQUAL MEASURES. AREN'T YOU GORGEOUS? BLAKE'S CALMING CUDDLES TRULY CATHARTIC. WE WORK IN A JOB THAT CAN BE QUITE EMOTIONALLY DRAINING SOMETIMES. EVERYBODY TRIES TO GET A LITTLE 5 MINUTE BREAK IN THE DAY, AND COME OUT AND GET SOME PATS. OH, YOU ARE SO CUTE, AREN'T YOU? THESE DAYS, WHEN BLAKE CAN HELP IT, ARE CHEESE DAYS. HE GETS PAID WITH CHEESE. (CHUCKLES) WITH EXTRA TREATS THIS MORNING BECAUSE TODAY IS EXTRA SPECIAL. BLAKE'S LAST ROUND BEFORE RETIREMENT... WE HAD THESE MADE FOR YOU ON YOUR LAST VISIT. AND DON'T WORRY, PIPPA (3) BACK AT HOME IS MORE THAN READY TO TAKE THE REINS. THE PAIR'S SUPER-SIZED, SUPER-FLUFFY, SUPER NOVEL KIND OF THERAPY ` UNPAID BUT INVALUABLE. YOU GOT TO SEE HIM ON YOUR LAST DAY? AND IT'S HIS LAST DAY, EH. THAT'S SPECIAL. WE'RE GOING TO MISS YOU. EH. ARE YOU GOING TO MISS US TOO? DURING THAT POINT ` THE INTERACTION WITH BLAKE, THE INTERACTION WITH SARAH, THEY'RE NOT THINKING WHY THEY'RE HERE; THEY'RE JUST GETTING THIS LOVELY TACTILE EXPERIENCE. AH YEP, 16 MICRON, APPARENTLY. WE NEVER QUITE KNOW WHAT PEOPLE ARE GOING THROUGH, WHAT THE FAMILIES ARE GOING THROUGH, SO IT'S JUST NICE THAT PEOPLE SEEM TO RELAX WHEN HE'S THERE. SIGHS: OHH. SHOULD BE MORE OF IT. SHOULD BE MORE OF IT, ACTUALLY, IN MY OPINION. BLAKE'S FINAL HOORAH ENDING FITTINGLY WITH EXHAUSTION, BEFORE ONE LAST PUSH FOR HIS FAVOURITE OFF-DUTY TREAT. HE ALWAYS GETS FRIES AFTER WE'VE BEEN VISITING. HE GETS SPOILT AT THE CAFE. COS IF YOU CAN'T HAVE HOT CHIPS IN RETIREMENT, WHEN CAN YOU? (BUOYANT MUSIC) WE HAVE SOME VERY GOOD NEWS TO SHARE WITH YOU. TOMORROW IS SATURDAY. WHICH MEANS THAT RIGHT, RIGHT NOW, IT'S TIME FOR THE FRIDAY COUNTDOWN. # IT'S THE FRIDAY COUNTDOWN. # (CAT MEOWS) (GUNSHOT!) A GOOD LOG LIKE THIS CAN SOMETIMES HAVE 50 GRUBS IN IT. IN 'ANIMALS WHERE THEY SHOULDN'T BE' NEWS ` SHOULD WRIGGLING, DISGUSTING HUHU GRUBS BE INSIDE THE MOUTHS OF SEVEN SHARP REPORTERS? SURELY NOT. BUT THAT'S THE FATE THAT BEFELL OUR INTREPID SOUTH ISLAND COLLEAGUE JENDY HARPER, WHO TOOK ONE FOR THE TEAM AHEAD OF THIS WEEKEND'S WILD FOOD FESTIVAL IN HOKITIKA. OH, YOU DIDN'T DO IT? (ALL CHUCKLE) IT'S NOT GONNA GO DOWN. AND IT'S $5, THANK YOU. (ALL LAUGH) A WOOLLY MOUSE? WHATEVER NEXT? WELL, YOU MIGHT BE SURPRISED. SO WE ACTUALLY ENGINEERED A MOUSE EQUIVALENT OF MAMMOTH GENES THAT WE'VE IDENTIFIED ON OUR QUEST TO BRING BACK THE MAMMOTH INTO MICE IN A HEALTHY WAY AND PRODUCE WHAT WE BELIEVE IS... UH, COLD-TOLERANT, WOOLLY, PHENOTYPE-DRIVEN MICE. THE BOFFINS AT COLOSSAL BIOSCIENCES ARE ALSO HOPING TO BRING BACK THE DODO AND THE TASMANIAN TIGER. WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG? KEEP ABSOLUTELY STILL. HIS VISION'S BASED ON MOVEMENT. (PURRS) A BETTER PLAN MIGHT BE TO STOP ANIMALS FROM GOING EXTINCT IN THE FIRST PLACE, WHICH IS WHAT CONSERVATIONISTS IN NEW MEXICO ARE DOING AS THEY KEEP TRACK OF THE REMAINING 286 GREY WOLVES NATIVE TO THE AREA. AND THINGS ARE LOOKING UP ` THIS BEING THE NINTH YEAR IN A ROW THAT THE POPULATION HAS GROWN. 'GOOD AFTERBLE, CONSTERNOON.' JUST JOKES, HE'S NOT DRUNK. IT'S JUST MEDS TALKING, WHICH WILL SOON WEAR OFF. PUB QUIZ KIDS ` WHAT IS THIS? IF YOU GUESSED THAT IT'S THE WORLD'S OLDEST ALPACA, YOU'D BE HALF-RIGHT. BECAUSE IT IS, IN FACT, A VERY OLD LLAMA. THE BUCK-TOOTHED BEAST CALLED 'WHITE TOP' IS NEARLY 28 YEARS OLD AND LIVES AT THE VICTORY JUNCTION CAMP FOR SICK KIDS IN SOUTH CAROLINA. WHEN I STARTED, STARTED STROKING HIM MORE AND MORE AND MORE, I GOT MORE RELAXED. FUN FACT ` LLAMAS, APART FROM THE DELI, TEND TO LIVE FOR ABOUT 15 YEARS. IN 'SPORTS/RELIGIOUS NEWS', GET A LOAD OF THE ANNUAL SHROVETIDE FOOTBALL BRAWL THAT TAKES PLACE EACH YEAR IN THE ENGLISH TOWN OF ASHBOURNE, DERBYSHIRE. IT'S THE WORLD'S LARGEST, LONGEST AND OLDEST STREET SOCCER GAME GOING BACK TO 1667. THE BALL IS USUALLY HELD RUGBY-LIKE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HORDE, LIKE A GIANT MALL, AND ONLY OCCASIONALLY BREAKS FREE. THE WINNER IS ALLOWED TO KEEP THE BALL AND DRINK AS MUCH ALE AS HE OR SHE CAN CONSUME AT THE LOCAL PUB. IN BALLOON NEWS, NOT SINCE THE GIANT BABY TRUMP THAT EMERGED IN THE UK, A FEW YEARS BACK, HAS A BLOWN-UP CELEBRITY MADE SUCH A SPLASH, AND IF THIS VOLUPTUOUS INFLATABLE, WHICH APPEARED IN TIMES SQUARE THIS WEEK, REMINDS YOU OF KIM KARDASHIAN, THAT'S BECAUSE IT IS. ALL IN THE AID OF FLOGGING HER OWN LINE OF SKIMPY SWIMWEAR. I DON'T LIKE IT. I THINK IT'S VERY FUNNY. THE CELEBRATION OF FILM AND FASHION, KNOWN AS THE OSCARS, ONCE AGAIN, PROVIDED A PAMPERED THESPIAN A PLATFORM TO DELIVER, WHAT SOME ARE ALREADY CALLING, THE WORST ACCEPTANCE SPEECH IN HISTORY. ADRIEN BRODY. (CHEERING) THEY'RE ALREADY COUNTING ME DOWN. OK. THANK YOU, GOD. BUT AS TERRIBLE AS ADRIEN BRODY WAS, AND HE REALLY WAS... (INTERLUDE MUSIC PLAYS) I WILL WRAP UP. PLEASE, TURN THE MUSIC OFF. I'VE DONE THIS BEFORE. ...IT WAS ALSO GREAT NEWS FOR FANS OF 'NUMBER 8 WIRE', LITTLE GUY ENERGY. THE OSCAR FOR ANIMATED FILM DIDN'T GO TO A DISNEY OR PIXAR FILM THIS YEAR, BUT TO A BIG-HEARTED, LOW BUDGET FILM ABOUT A CAT AND HIS MATES CALLED FLOW, MADE BY SOME MATES FROM LATVIA, USING OPEN SOURCE SOFTWARE AND ALL RENDERED ON A PERSONAL LAPTOP. AND AT NUMBER ONE... THE MOMENT WAS BEST SUMMED UP BY THE BODY LANGUAGE OF THE UKRAINIAN AMBASSADOR IN THE OVAL OFFICE, AS TRUMP TURNED ON ZELENSKY IN THE DIPLOMATIC CLUSTER FUDGE THAT SMACKED THE WORLD RIGHT IN THE GOB. PEOPLE ARE DYING. YOU'RE RUNNING LOW ON SOLDIERS. LISTEN. AND JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT THINGS COULDN'T GET ANY WORSE, THIS GUY OPENED HIS MOUTH. WHY DON'T YOU WEAR A SUIT? DO YOU OWN A SUIT? WHILE THE QUESTION HUNG IN THE AIR LIKE AN OLD MAN'S NAPPY, IT ALSO INSPIRED THIS GEM FROM SINGER RON GALLO, WHICH WAS EASILY THE ANTHEM OF THE WEEK. (GENTLE GUITAR MUSIC PLAYS) # HOW DARE YOU TALK OVER ME, # YELLING OVER YOU? # IF ONLY ZELENSKY HAD A NICE SUIT. # MAYBE THERE'D BE SOMETHING THAT WE COULD DO. # IF ONLY ZELENSKY HAD A NICE SUIT. # A 10K BRIONI IN NAVY BLUE. # A WHITE SHIRT AND A RED TIE. # NO ONE ELSE WOULD HAVE TO DIE. # IF ONLY ZELENSKY HAD A NICE SUIT, # AND DIDN'T WEAR ALL BLACK TO MATCH WITH HIS TROOPS. # WE'LL BE BACK IN JUST A MOMENT WITH TOMORROW'S PLACE TO BE. THE PLACE TO BE TOMORROW IS PALMERSTON NORTH. IT MIGHT BE A BIT DRIZZLY, BUT THE RURAL GAMES WILL BE ON IN THE SQUARE, SO THERE'LL BE A BIT OF FUN FOR EVERYONE. THOSE WERE OUR PEOPLE TODAY. THAT WAS SEVEN SHARP TONIGHT. THE REPAIR SHOP IS UP NEXT. WE'LL SEE YOU MONDAY. PO MARIE, CHEERIO. CAPTIONS BY TUI TIPENE, STEFFI DRYDEN AND LELE SIMEON. CAPTIONS WERE MADE WITH THE SUPPORT OF NZ ON AIR. WWW.ABLE.CO.NZ COPYRIGHT ABLE 2025