www.able.co.nz Captions were made possible with funding from NZ On Air. Able 2015 1 CHOIR: # God rest ye merry gentlemen # # Let nothing you dismay # Remember Christ our Saviour # Was born on Christmas Day, to save us all # -BOY: Shh! You're too loud. -# From Satan's power when # # We were gone astray, O # Tidings of comfort and joy # Comfort and joy, O # Tidings of comfort and joy # Fear not, then said the angel # # Let nothing you affright # This day is born a Saviour # Of a pure Virgin bright # To free all those who trust in Him # # From Satan's power and... Male. Nine years old. Possible ruptured eardrum. WOMAN: His name's Paul. -You're his parents? -Yes, yes, we are. -Yes. Right, I'll just need to get some -basic information from you. -He'll be all right. -He'll be all right. -So this is Paul. Last name, please. Potts. P-O-double-T-S. Paul Pott. What, like the Cambodian dictator? Not at all like the Cambodian dictator. DOCTOR: How long since it occurred? About an hour. He just collapsed during choir practice. Miracle he hasn't ruptured our eardrums with all this hooting and hollering. He's a passionate singer! Will he ever be able to sing again? Oh, yes, I don't see an issue there. Some fluid build-up in the middle ear, but not to worry. We'll have him right as rain in no time. So he'll be fine? I mean, it's not dangerous. Well, could be, but we can't tell until we fish around inside his noggin a bit. Cafe just down the corridor. (sighs) (doors close) He'll be right as rain, love. (sighs) Come on. PAUL (voice-over): As long as I can remember, I've wanted to sing. I mean, really sing. (door opens, closes) I was born with what our choir master called "a big voice." A voice that was born to sing opera, said my mum. And so I did. At home, in school, in church, on the bus. There he is! Get him! Get back, here, Pottsy! PAUL (voice-over): It turned out not everybody loved opera as much as I did, and not everybody loved the sound of my voice -as much as my mum did. -Get him! We're gonna get you, Pottsy! Get back here, you big, fat blob! (voice-over): And I got teased and bullied, mostly by my classmate, Matthew Spade, and his gang. If you can call a bunch of nine-year-olds a gang. (panting) The more they bullied me, the more I sang. The more I sang, the more they bullied me. (panting continues) -Come on, Pottsy! -Singing, bullying, -bullying and singing. -Oi, fatty! It was a seemingly endless drama full of music and violence and romance and comedy. Kind of like an opera. The opera of my life. (grunts) (Paul groaning) (sobbing) # Good tidings of comfort and joy # # Now to the Lord sing praises # All you within this place # And with true love and brotherhood # # Each other now embrace # This holy tide of Christmas # All others doth deface # Oh, tidings of comfort and joy # # Comfort and joy # Oh, tidings of comfort # And joy. (sighs) That's very nice indeed. (opera music playing over headphones) (dishes knocking) (music stops) (opera music playing over speakers) "Be gentle with me," said she. "Unicorns are not meant for human love." "But, lady," said I, "I am only half human." And I laid her down and took her there amidst the moss and leaves of the forest floor. And that was your weekend? In a nutshell. Yours? Sorry, did you just say you shagged a horse? It's a game, role-playing. Like Dungeons & Dragons, but for real. Oh, so she was girl, but dressed as a horse. A unicorn. Right, and you were...? A half-elf wizard from the Black Mages Guild of Quilanthium. Okay. And how's your girlfriend? Oh, she's brilliant. She really is. She's absolutely fantastic. And are you actually planning on meeting her at any point? -Well, she keeps asking me down there, but... -But what? You've been texting her for over a year now. What are you waiting for? Nothing, it's just... You're not a hundred percent sure she's actually a woman. Of course I am. I'm sure she is. I'm absolutely sure that she definitely must be. Let me show you this text. She sent me this the other night. Okay, this is, like, 11:00. She says... Oh, God. What's crawled up his ass? The signal on this phone is total crap! Right. The thing is, for the service to actually work, the phone itself should really be in no more than three or four pieces. -It's under warranty. -Of course. I'll tell you what. How's about this, Gandalf? You give me a phone that works, and I won't lodge this one up your arse. I doubt you'd get much of a signal up there. Oh, nearly forgot. Here. -Cheers. -I took the liberty while you were bravely cowering in the back. I wasn't bravely cowering in the back. You took the liberty to do what? Sunday morning, Port Talbot Railway Station, your boyfriend's on the 9:15 from Cardiff. You did what? It's not easy losing your virginity to someone 50 miles away. So you invited her here? You did, as far as she knows. (gasps) Jesus, Braddon, she looks like Cameron Diaz! Oh, how terrible. -Yeah, it is. -In what univer... Hold on. You told her you look like someone famous as well. A bit, yeah. Who? (sighs) (panting) (panting) Brad? Cameron? (chuckles) You're a woman. -What? -(laughs) That is fantastic. Thank you. (giggles) Well, you've obviously got a very low bar. That's a good thing. Welcome to Port Talbot. Thank you. (giggles) Sorry I'm late. I, uh... Yeah, I thought you stood me up. -My heart was in my mouth. -No, I wouldn't dare. No, I was, um... I wanted to get you something, but the florist was shut, so I, um... -Aw. -I got you this. -It's a good one. -Oh. You, uh... you don't need batteries. You-you, um... -you wind it up. -Oh, wow. -Thank you. -It's orange. -Do you like it? -Yeah. It's a torch. It's... ace. You hungry? (giggles) Always. Great. Should we? Yeah. Right. So, there's bad pub food or really bad pub food. -Oh! -Which do you prefer? -So many options, so little time. -(phone ringing) Oh, oh, it's just my mum making sure that I'm still alive -and you haven't murdered me. -(both laugh) As if I'd murder you in broad daylight. I'd wait till it was dark. I wouldn't do it on the high street. (chuckles): I... I'm not actually gonna murder you. I'm get... babbling. I'm nervous. Don't be. (chuckles) Really nice gloves. -Paul! -Thank you. Is that you, love? Oh, God. Well, bless my soul. Hiya. Well, hello. -I'm Paul's mum. -It's my mum. Lovely to meet you. -I'm Julz. -This is Julz. It's... -Paul, why didn't you t... -I didn't know -you were gonna be here, Mum. -Well, you must come to lunch. -No, absolutely not, no. -My husband would love -to meet you. -That's... no. Well, you need to be getting back to the station, don't you? No, it's all right. I'd love to come. Come. Come here. Let me help you with that. Oh, thank you, love. Aren't you lovely? Now, you must tell me all about yourself. That's a lovely torch. Oh, thank you very much. (both laugh) And then I thought to myself, "I haven't got the slightest interest in die-cast aluminium figurines." So, um, I just got a job at the pharmacy in Boots. Oh, honest job, Boots. Mm-hmm. As is Carphone Warehouse. Now, have some more potatoes, love. Oh, thank you. Oh, gosh. That's loads. Thank you. ROLAND: And your parents, what do they do? -Dad. -No, it's all right. -Um, my mother works down... -Her mum's a seamstress, and her dad's on disability from the chemical plant in Bristol. Oh. Did Paul tell you? I met his mother in Bristol. -No. -Yeah. I spent ten years in the metalworks over there in, uh, Redfield near that pub. -Yeah, the Black Horse. -Right. -That's where Paul was conceived. -Really? -Backseat of Roland's car. -That's what we're gonna -talk about, is it? My conception? -(Julz laughs) Why not? It was wonderful. Um, Paul tells me that you were quite the rugby player in your time. Oh. I did once fracture Gareth Edwards' clavicle. Oh, here we go. Yeah, he was running on the wing... ALL: About to cut inside. (laughter) I made the front page of the "South Wales Argus," I did. That was a proud day. (chuckles) You're not the only celebrity in the family, then. ROLAND: You know, Paul could get a job at the steelworks, hmm? Get a flat of his own. Hard to come by, union benefits these days. I'd sooner sleep under a bridge. That can be arranged. No, Paul's gonna be a wonderful singer. Oh, God. (chuckles) You know, I thought you two only met this morning. Nonsense. How could I be his girlfriend if we've only just met? YVONNE: No, it turns out that all the time we thought he was up there on his computer looking at pornography, he was actually e-mailing this lovely thing. -(chuckling) -Look at him blushing now. Couldn't you just eat him up? You'd need a couple of sittings. (opera music playing over speakers) Wow. I knew you were mad for opera, but I didn't know you were completely psycho for it. (chuckles) (giggles) What's this? This is "Che Galinda Manina." From "La Boheme" by Puccini. Pavarotti sung this aria in 1961 in a singing competition that changed his whole life. What, like made him a superstar? (thumping on floor) Oh, leave them be, Roland. -Hey! -Do you want to scare her off? On the contrary, I'm trying to rescue her from the bloody violins. -(thumping continues) -Do you want to go for a walk? Yeah. Yeah, all right. And opera just...? I always loved it, since I was a kid. You know, from the first time I heard Pavarotti sing "Nessun Dorma," that was... Oh, you must have been a very strange little boy. (laughs) I was. I still am. No, I-I always loved it. It... It's like a dream world to me where people speak their feelings and say exactly what they mean. In French or Italian. That's the beauty of it. Like, if you just shut your eyes and listen to it, suddenly you're somewhere else. Like, somewhere beautiful or exciting and dramatic and real, like, more real than real life could ever be. I got... I think I am only truly happy when I'm listening to or singing opera. -Will you sing for me? -(groans) -Oh, go on. Just a little bit. -I... -It's not that I don't... -Come on, why not? I get nervous. Okay. Someday, then? Someday. One foot and then the other. Yeah. Have you ever seen him live? Pavarotti? No, but he's on the board of the opera school that I'm saving up for to go to in Venice. So it's all about meeting him? Oh, there's no chance he'll be there, but the school's got a great track record of placing singers in other companies, and I don't know, an opera career is too much to hope for, but... it's all I ever hope for. Until today. How much money do you need? I'm still short about 500 quid. And when is it? Three weeks. I'm thinking of selling my body. How will you get the other 498 pounds? (laughs) Oh, thanks a lot. -Yeah, two pounds. Is that it? -(Julz laughing) That's all I'm worth? Two pounds. Oh, he was just mean, really. He shagged my best friend and then told me it was because I was getting too f... It doesn't matter. Sounds like a tosser. Yeah, enormous tosser. The capital of Uruguay? PAUL: Montevideo. Hey, not just a pretty face. Look, I'm way over it. I don't need that much love. I don't expect it, anyway, not coming from where I do, but... nothing ventured, nothing gained and all that. You got to take chances sometimes, don't you? Just be brilliant to take a chance on something actually worthwhile for a change. The Cuban Missile Crisis. If you could be anyone in the world, who would you be? Um... Well, seeing as I'm a dead ringer for Cameron Diaz... (both laugh) Well, she's got her own career, famous boyfriends and an ass I'd sell my mum for. (chuckles) You? Martina Navratilova. -Serious? -18 Grand Slams. -It's Martina Navratilova. -Oh, right. (laughs) No, I wouldn't be anybody else. I just want to be myself. No, you got to be someone. I don't want to. That confident, are we? No, on the contrary. Well, if I were someone else, I wouldn't be here with you. Hello, Paul. What are you doing here? (gasps) Is this... This is. You are. -I am. -She is. You're a girl. Why do people keep saying that? This is Julz. And you are? Hydrangea. -Hiya. -Is that a unicorn? -Uh, uh, uh... -Oh, you must be the... (coughs) Have you signed up for the contest? BOTH: What contest? Probably no point; I got it all sewn up. What is it? Biggest twat in the world? Most perfunctory love-maker? Actually, the Annual Talent contest. Worst athlete's foot? -Spottiest back? -Laugh at me now. You won't be laughing when I do my comedy routine. 300 pound for the winner. -Is it? -Come on, Seinfeld. You can wash my motor scooter. Is that code? Don't be a prick, Braddon. All right. See you tomorrow, Pottsy. -See you. -(chuckles) That's Braddon; he's my boss. No way. The less you think about him, the better. What time is your train? Ten to. What time is it now? Oh. Quarter to. Right, come on. Oh, God. We got to go. We got to get a move on here. (exhales) Come on! (train horn blows) -I've had a lovely day. -I've had the best time. So, uh, I'll see you when you get back? From where? From Venice, of course. -Well, that could be years. -(bell ringing) Nonsense. You're gonna win that talent competition. Listen, if the next time we speak, you're not ringing me from a gondola in Venice, then... Well, you'll never have another one of these. (sighs) See you, Brad. Bye, Cameron. (chuckles) -(laughs) -(whistle blows) (sighs) Belly button fluff, eh? Why is it always blue? -Get off! -It's always blue! -Rubbish! Yeah, well, that's not gonna get you anywhere, is it? -Fire at will, boys! -Even if I've been wearing a red top or... All right. No matter what, -it's always blue. -(crowd jeering) Hilarious, isn't it? (forced laugh) Thanks very much. I'm Braddon Evans. Peace out. -(crowd jeering) -Piss off! Go home! EMCEE: Bet Billy Connolly is shaking in his boots right now, ladies and gentlemen. Port Talbot's answer to Norman Wisdom. Went well, I think. What are you wearing? I'm Pavarotti as Canio in "Pagliacci." I don't understand what that means. You just made noises at me. It's a character, the... Oh, it doesn't matter. EMCEE: And next, singing... Blimey. "Vesti la Goober"... (crowd murmuring) We have the vocal stylings of Paul Potts. -That's you. -Christ. Next thing you'll tell me, we got Robert Mugabe -doing the juggling. -(laughter) That is so obvious. I could've come up with that like that, but I chose not to, and that's the difference. -Paul Potts. -I think I'm gonna be sick. -(applause) -Well, is he coming or what? -Come on! -He can't get through the door. -He's stuck! Go on, Tubsy! -(laughter) Seriously, bud. -You've got to get on. -I can't do it, I... -Get on now! -Oh, my God. (applause) (crowd cheering) -(laughter) -Oh, my God, what are you wearing?! MATTHEW: Hey, somebody call the zoo! -There's a panda on the loose! -Great buns! Just like Michelin Man! MATTHEW: Somebody chuck him a biscuit! (laughter) Get off the stage, man! Your pies are ready! What are you gonna sing? "Tears of a Clown"? (laughter continues) I think he's gonna eat the microphone! (Village People's "YMCA" playing) That's not... that's not my song. That's not my song. That's not... That's not me. That's not my music. -Hey, quiet, man! -(music stops) -Let the pregnant lady sing! -(laughter) -(opera music playing) -Oh, my God! He swallowed Pavarotti! (laughter) (singing opera music in Italian) (continues singing opera music in Italian) (continues singing opera music in Italian) (music ends) -(crowd cheering) -Come on! That's my boy! Pottsy! (cheering continues) Oh, thank you. Cheers. -Well done, Paul. -Thanks so much. -Thank you. Cheers. -Great job, man. Aw, thanks very much. Cheers. Well done, I suppose. Thanks, mate. They're not ready for you; you're ahead of your time. Yeah, they'll only learn to appreciate me when I'm dead and gone. It'll be easier for me then, too. Can't you be kind? I'm feeling depressed and hopeless. My self-esteem's at its lowest ebb. You're basically describing the symptoms of being your girlfriend. -Girlfriend, you say? -Look who it is there, the big star of the night. Hello, Pottsy. Who are you supposed to be then? Casper the obese ghost, is it? Get off me! (groans) (groaning loudly) Looks like I'm the winner of this contest, huh, Pottsy? -Give it back! -Sorry, mate, didn't quite catch that. You gonna have to sing a little louder. I said give it back! (grunts) My turn now, is it? You're gonna pay for that. BRADDON: May the Flame of Averon sustain me! (grunting) PAUL: Get off me. Remember this? No! -(grunts) -(guitar clangs) (groans) Where the hell did you get that from? From me, mate. That was brilliant, love. Would've made Pete Townshend proud. DRUMMER: Now you want to keep smashing it, then set it on fire. (groaning) You all right? Yeah, let's just get out of here. Truce? I'll have you for this. HYDRANGEA: Can I have another go? That was surprisingly exhilarating. PAUL: No. Leave him. Cheers, then. Damn, woman, that was incredible. -You saved us. -That's got me all hot and bothered; I'm all revved up. My car's around the corner. We can be at my place in four minutes. Oh. You were stupendous tonight, Pottsy. You're my hero! Mine, too! See you. (panda sneezing) (laughing) (phone ringing) Hello? PAUL: Hey, Cameron. Who is this? It's me, Paul. I knew a Paul once, but... Oh, come on. You can't be mad at me. Three weeks goes way past playing hard to get. It's been 19 days, and you said not to call until I was settled. -Where? -In Venice. You're really there? I can hardly believe it myself, but I'm actually here. You serious? Y-You're not having me on? No, it's true. I'm calling you now from the middle of the Grand Canal! JULZ (voice-over): Well, tell me everything. Where are you staying? Have you got a nice place? PAUL (voice-over): Well, it's not big, but it's got a real Venetian balcony on a quiet little Venetian street. The school is brilliant. It's an old 16th-century palazzo right in the heart of the city. Scusi, excuse me. (instruments tuning) Every morning starts off with four hours of intensive Italian... (teacher speaks Italian) (man laughs, mutters) ...which I find comes quite easily. -(holding note) -No, no, no, Paulo. (voice-over): In the afternoons, we study opera with Signora Fiorentino, who has almost nothing but praise for my technique. (continues holding note) (man speaking Italian) Once in a while, we practice stage combat. Ow! This is acting class, not stabbing class! That really hurt. Jesus! And the food, it must be incredible. PAUL (voice-over): Oh, it's bellisimo. So fresh and authentic. There's nothing else quite like it. JULZ: Not to mention the art and the architecture. PAUL: Which is amazing. I visited a museum yesterday, had over 50 paintings by Tintoretto. JULZ: I think Mum's got one of them in the downstairs loo. (both laugh) (slurping) And the-the people? Have you made loads of friends? PAUL: Oh, yeah, loads. There's parties every night; it's non-stop. (people chattering in Italian) (laughter) JULZ: So... do you miss me? Terribly. Good. Buananotte. Buananotte. (sighs) 5 Allora. Here is some very exciting news. In two weeks, Il Maestro, Pavarotti, will visit the school to teach a master class. -(students murmur) -Unfortunately, he has not the time to hear everyone sing, so we will choose for him the best students from our recital of duets. The most outstanding will sing solo for the maestro. Claro? Bueno. (speaking Italian) Julia e... Daniel. (speaking Italian) Alessandra e... ...Paulo. Grazie. (speaking Italian) -ALESSANDRA: I want to win. -Right. Yeah, that would be lovely. No, you don't understand. I want to win. I'm not so sure it's important -for you to sing for Pavarotti. -Wha...? No, it is. It's... important. It's the most important thing in the world to me. To sing well for Pavarotti can make your whole career. Do you understand? Right. Yeah. So if you screw it up, I'll get my brothers to hurt you. Badly. (Paul singing opera music in Italian) No, no, no, Paulo, no. Look at Alessandra, not at your shoes. You are Rodolfo. She is Mimi. This is-- how you say? Uh, the spark. The moment of love creation. "O soave fanciulla, o dolce visio." "O lovely girl, O sweet face." "In te vivo ravviso il sogno. Ch'io vorrei sempre sognar." "I see you in a dream. I will dream forever." You have been in love, yes? Yeah. And how did you show your girl this? I bought her a torch. -(students chuckling) -The florist was shut. It was a rechargeable one. Alessandra is a beautiful girl, no? Yep. Look. With your eyes. Mm, yeah, no, she's very pretty. -Is okay. -(speaks Italian) You have two weeks before the recital. Two weeks to make us believe that you are more in love than any two people have ever been in love. Dream only of each other. Think of nothing and nobody else. Allora. Again. Paulo? Will you travel for the fine settimana? Uh, uh, the weekend? Um, no, I-I was gonna stay here and practice. Da solo? Don't you want to practice together with me? Together? No, well, yeah, that would be great. We can get to know each other a little and I can take you home, so you can meet my family. Does your family include your brothers? Well, don't worry, my brothers will love you. I thought you said they were gonna kill me. Oh, please, no one is going to kill you. -I was only joking. -No, you weren't. -(man speaking Italian) -(bell tolling in distance) I am her dad! (laughter) (laughter continues) -(speaks Italian) -Mama. Shut up! -No. -Scusi? She only means to say you should be true to yourself. It's what she always taught me, and what I've taught my children. Alessandra, for example, she is a great singer. We believe in her so she can believe in herself. That's what families do. (laughter) (speaking Italian) -To Paul! -(others toast in Italian) (Paul singing in Italian) (continues singing in Italian) (both singing in Italian) (both holding last note) MAN: Bravi! (crowd cheering, shouting in Italian) -Bravo! -(shouting in Italian continues) (both laughing) You were amazing tonight! I can't. What's wrong? (panting): Nothing. It's... You don't like to kiss me? No, I do. I like... I-I really like it. It's just... I... You have a girlfriend at home. Yeah. A girlfriend-- or at least I think I do. Signora Fiorentino was right. You have a wonderful heart, Paulo. Sod off. -It's true. -You're not taking the piss? I swear I'm not. I'm gonna sing for him tomorrow. Oh, my... Paul, you must be so nervous. (chuckles) I'm petrified. Well, you know what, you're gonna be fine. You just need to breathe onstage... Julz... can I tell you something? Yeah. Go on. Say it. I wish you were here. So do I. I'll bring you back one day. Mm. Promise. (bell tolling) (Alessandra singing in Italian accompanied by piano) (holding high note) (sings closing phrase) Brava! Brava! Fantastico! (Pavarotti speaking Italian) -Grazie. -(Pavarotti chuckles) (whispering): I wouldn't want to have to follow that. No. Me, neither. Paulo. (panting) I see you've gone for the Nokia 6020. It's a... brilliant phone. Not cheap, mind you, but I doubt you worry about that. (laughs) How are you finding the battery life on it? Is it...? We can... Should we...? Yeah? Okay. (piano playing softly) (singing in Italian) (voice cracks) Can I... Sorry. Sorry. Can I... (mumbles) (cups clacking) (gulping) (whispers): Sorry. (piano playing softly) (singing in Italian) (voice cracks) (voice falters) Basta, basta. Stop, please. No more. You are very nervous, no? (whispers): Very. See, I can hear it in your voice. You lack too much the confidence. Rodolfo could never run out of breath like this on "che giova." To sing opera, you need to steal the heart of the audience, and you cannot steal unless you have the nerves of the thief. For me, you are not yet an opera singer. Not yet, for sure. And maybe never. -Finito? -Finito. 4 (machinery rumbling) MAN: Now we add the iron ore, limestone and coke. Bake up to about 2,000 degrees, and Bob's your uncle. Come on, boys, let's show you how we make the gingerbread. MAN: George, George, hang on a minute. These ovens are only about a thousand degrees, so consider yourself lucky if you end up here. Come on, boys, straight through. (vehicle rumbling nearby) (engine stops, door closes) Cary Morris tells me you walked off the job. Can't do it, Dad. I can't work here. Oh, too physical, is it? Huh? Don't get to wear enough makeup or hear enough applause? There's nobody screaming "encore"? You have had your great adventure, which is more than I ever had. But this is your life now. Work hard, get a few quid in your pocket, grab a few pints before you go home, and... -once or twice a week... -Hey! -(horn honking) Coming for a pint or what, Roland? Bring Paul along. He can sing us one of his Italian songs. (laughs) I-I'll catch up with you. All right, nice one. Now, you listen. There's a waiting list as long as a donkey's knob for your job. I was able to square things with Cary this once, but you screw up again, and you will be out in the street in more ways than one. Do I make myself clear? -Do I?! -Yes. WOMAN (voice-over): Right. Now, how far away from the house will the telephone actually work? As far as you like. Oh, rubbish. The last telephone we had, the cord wouldn't even reach as far as the back door. This doesn't have a cord. What do you call this, then? Now, look here, we don't take kindly to bullshitters. -No. -That's because you're insane. -Oh! -You can't say that to us! -How very rude! -Come on, we're going somewhere else. -Oh, never coming here again. -Some people have no manners. Customer service skills are improving by the day, I see. Hello, Pottsy. When did you get back? Couple of weeks. How was it? I... didn't really... Oh, dear. Come on, let's get out of here. Blast furnace slag removal-- Christ. Could anything sound more glamorous than that? Maybe I'll get used to it. Maybe I'll grow a third hand so that I can surf online and wank at the same time. -I thought you already had. -No. You've got to be born with it. Same as you were born to sing. You're the lucky one, Paul-- you know what you were put on this earth to do. You have an actual talent for singing. Not according to Pavarotti. Screw Pavarotti-- he's nothing but a binge eater with a comb-over. And my absolute hero. So you choked. Everybody chokes sometimes. It's not the end of the world. No, the end of the world's right there. Slag removal. Don't go back in there if you can help it. At least not while you still have your voice and a girlfriend who believes in you. I'm not sure I've even got that anymore. Don't tell me you screwed it up with Julz, too. All right, now you're a bloody loser. (sighs) (line ringing) (ringtone playing) (ringtone stops) JULZ (recorded): Hiya. It's Julz. Leave a message after the tone. You finding everything you need, sir? Mm-hmm. Yes. No, I-I'm good, thank you very much. You're intending to buy something, yeah? Yeah. No, I am. That's... No, I wouldn't... I need to get these, actually. This is what I'm... These are the good ones, right? These are the-- yup, ones and... ones and twos. So... that's me. I'm all done now, thanks very much. FEMALE AUTOMATED VOICE: Cashier number five, please. Oh, still no joy, Mrs. Cosgrove? No. Still can't shift a thing down there. It's like pushing a pineapple down a hosepipe. FEMALE AUTOMATED VOICE: Cashier number one, please. JULZ: Right, well, a couple more of these, now, and you'll be right as rain. -All right. -Cashier number one, please. FEMALE AUTOMATED VOICE: Cashier number five, please. Julz, I'm so sorry. Is that all today, sir? I'm an idiot, all right? It's 9.99, please. Listen, I just wanted to be able to speak to you about... -If you'll just let me explain... -9.99. ...exactly why I've been doing this, all right, Julz? FEMALE AUTOMATED VOICE: Cashier number five, please. JULZ: Hi. Do you want a bag? FEMALE AUTOMATED VOICE: Cashier number three, please. Thank you. FEMALE AUTOMATED VOICE: Cashier number four, please. There's your change. All right? Thank you. FEMALE AUTOMATED VOICE: Cashier number one, please. Cashier number five, please. (panting) Look, I know you're mad, right, but if you'll listen to me... -50 pence. -Will you listen to me -just for one... -(scanner beeps) -It's a pound. There is a very legitimate reason -why I didn't... -(beep) Will you please just give me a cha... -Julz, stop. -No! I trusted you. I thought what we had meant something. Look... I never want to see you again. Do you have a Boots Advantage Card? (softly): No. FEMALE AUTOMATED VOICE: Cashier number five, please. Are you serious? If there's no problem, sir, I'm gonna have to ask you to move it along. (softly): I'm sorry. Hi. -JULZ: Thank you. -Ta-ta. -Ta-ta. See you tomorrow. -Ta-ta. I-I messed up. All right? Pavarotti tore me to shreds. I choked, and I couldn't call you, 'cause I couldn't bear to hear your voice knowing how badly I'd let you down. Oh, you think that's what let me down? Don't know, I just felt so... Oh, did you ever think how I felt, wondering what had happened to you? I was falling in love with you, and when you got back from Venice, I was gonna come down, knock on your door and say, "You know what, let's give it a go. Let's move in together." I had all my bags packed, and I was just waiting for you to call, and nothing. -Nothing. -I'm sorry. No. I'm done with you. Julz. -Julz, please. Please, Jules! -Leave me alone! (panting) Wait! Julz! # Thou art # My thought, my present # And my future # Thou art my heart supreme # Its only joy # I love thee more # Than any earthly creature # I love thee dear, I love thee dear # # I love thee now # And for eternity # I love thee now # And for eternity. So you can sing, then? Yeah, I can. I can for you. 4 1 1 # For to whatever fate # God's will may do me # I love thee dear, I love thee dear # # I love thee now # And for eternity # I love thee now # And for eternity. (laughs) -(crowd cheering) -(Julz laughing) -(pop music playing) -(laughter) # And hurt you! Fancy a drink? Uh, champagne, please. Back in a flash, Mrs. Potts. Why, thank you very much, Mr. Potts. (laughter) Hello there. -How are you? -Did you know I once fractured Gareth Edwards' clavicle? No, the Gareth Edwards? Aye, when I was your age. BOTH: I was running down the wing, about to cut inside... -Oh, you bastard! -(laughter) Having me on. Champagne and a lager, please. Paul, Paul, you remember Bill and Matthew, don't you? MATTHEW: Paul and me went to school together. Felicitations and all that. Thanks. Surprised to see you getting married. Wasn't even sure they'd dropped yet. (laughter) He's joking. We're all three or four sheets to the wind. How could you even invite him here? How could I not? He married your mother's niece, Julie, last April. And besides, he's a good lad. He plays rugby. He's not afraid of hard work. What's all the bad blood between you two, anyway? What's all the bad blood between you two, anyway? Not today, Dad. Wait, love. Go on, tell him. I say, young man, I don't know where you found it, but your vocal control has improved by light-years. Oh, thanks very much. I spent some time in Italy, but I don't really sing anymore. Tell him. I am commissioned to conduct a production of "Aida" in Bath. And you, sir, would make a wonderful Radames. Are you serious? There's no pay, I'm afraid. Well, now, hold on. -He'll take it. -I'd love to. -Oh, Jesus. What? -Oh, do be quiet. They're playing our song, so why don't you stop moaning and start thrusting your pelvis in my general direction. -(laughs) -Congratulations. Thank you so much. That is the best news. I can't quite believe that. Thank you! (Paul and Julz laughing) I mean, the lead in "Aida." -(door closes) -I can't believe it. I don't know how this day can get any better. Well, um... I could think of something. Oh, hang on. I got you a surprise. What? What is it? Oh, my God! I know. Where did you find this? That's not even the best bit. What is it? A bike. Just open it. Puccini. It's an original recording from... Oh. From... from... from La Scala, Milan, -on April 25, 192... -1926. Conducted by Toscanini. Oh, my God. I can't believe this. And this was recorded before Pavarotti was even born. It's a really difficult aria, especially at the end. (opera music playing) Thank you. Thank you so much. Oh, what's he saying? (both laugh) He's saying, "Nessun dorma." "None shall sleep." Calaf has been rejected by the woman that he loves. -She's a princess. -(groans) Why does it always have to be about a princess? Why can't checkout girls have great love stories written about them? Yeah, I don't think they had checkout girls in the 1700s, babe. (chuckles) Help me with this, will you? If she can guess his name by dawn, she gets to cancel the wedding... Hmm. ...and she can chop his head off. Sounds a bit more exciting than calling for a clean-up on aisle seven. (both laugh) There you go. -That's it. -Okay. You're done. Right, turn away, then. (opera music continues) "My secret is hidden within me. "None shall know my name. "On your mouth, I will say it when the light shines." "And my kiss "will dissolve the silence that makes you mine." So kiss me. I've never done this before. That's okay. I've had thousands. (chuckles): I'm joking. So what happens to them? (sighs) Well, she tortures all his friends who refuse to reveal his name. And then at dawn... ...he kisses her, and she falls madly in love with him. 4 Right, so that's... And that's the bit where I come up, and I come up to about, what, about here, yeah? -A step downstage perhaps. -Uh-huh. And then... Right, and that's where I take her in my arms and start to seduce her. While singing brilliantly, of course. (chuckles) Well, of course, yeah. (singing) (horn honks) Drink with me, Paul. What? Drink with me. Come on, drink with me. No, it's 10:00 in the morning. What are you doing? Drowning my sorrows. -Why? -She left me. -Who? -Hydrangea. She left me this morning. She leaves you every morning; she has to be at work at 7:00. What did you do? I got down on one knee and asked her to marry me. Oh, wow. I know. Wish I could take it all back, but I can't. Get out! -Braddon! -Get out! I'm so sorry, Mrs. Petersham. She was coming back for an upgrade! Are you serious? That's why she left? I rushed her. She was always saying she didn't want to be rushed, but maybe she didn't want to be loved. Or maybe she didn't know how to be loved. Maybe none of us do. Drink with me, Paul, please? I can't. I've got the show tomorrow. Rejected again. -No, it's... -Cast adrift. A lone sailor looking for love on the open seas. All right, maybe I'll just have a sip then. Oh, that's... Ow! (winces) Oh, what is that? Creme de menth. Why are you drinking it? It reminds me of my childhood. (burps) -(laughter over TV) -Hello? Radames? Wherefore art thou? Oh, my God. What's wrong? -God. -What's happened? (heart monitor beeping steadily) Right. Well, the good news is... it has got nothing to do with the creme de menth. And the not good news? The appendix hasn't ruptured yet. Oh, thank God. It is gonna have to come out, I'm afraid. W-When? -About an hour or so. -Well, no, I... I can't. No, his opera opens tomorrow night. Oh, fantastic. Which one? ALL: "Aida." Oh, now, is that the one with Madonna, the sort of... It's got that lovely Latin flavour to it? Hmm? Well, singing is quite out of the question, I'm afraid. Well, I-I'm the lead. I can't let everybody down. An appendectomy is invasive surgery. If we leave it in, it's sure to rupture, and, I mean, that could be fatal. If we take it out, any great effort like singing, for instance, and you're liable to burst the stitches, and that could cause irreparable damage to the kidneys and diaphragm. Well, how irreparable? Well, it is possible that singing won't be possible. Oh, that's that, then. ROLAND (voice-over): To sing so soon after surgery, well, it's... it's idiotic, if you ask me. Yes, well, we didn't. We never have and we're not going to. The least we can do is support him. No matter how much of a pinhead he's being. (sighs) Right, I'll thank you both not to talk about my husband in that way. Yes, you're right, love, but it's just so... (groans) I mean, why can't he just put himself first for a change? 'Cause then he'd just be like everyone else, wouldn't he? And he's not. You are a very lovely girl. (chuckles) I'd trade both my ears for a pint right about now. -(chorus singing) -(indistinct chatter) (groaning softly) STAGEHAND: All right, Paul, you okay? Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. The first act sounded bloody marvellous. Thanks. (chuckles) Ready for the big duet? Mm-hmm. (Paul and Aida singing opera music) (snoring) # The gods will pardon us # And grant us # Their peace # We'll be # At peace # The heavens open # Our troubled souls... (gasps) Paul! Paul! Excuse me. Excuse me. (monitor beeping steadily) Thank you, Doctor. -I don't believe it. -What? What is it? Well, they've stopped the bleeding. It's gonna be fine, but, um... they found a tumour in his thyroid. His what? In his throat. Look, I know you're frightened, and the fact that you might never sing again might be too much for you to bear, but... I just... I want you to know that even if you never even speak again, I will do everything in my power to fill our lives with as much music and love and happiness as I can possibly manage. JULZ: Thank you. Oh, come on. Just one drink. I swear we'll be home in a half hour, right? Thank you. -ALL: Surprise! -(laughter) # For he's a jolly good fellow # For he's a jolly good fellow # # For he's a jolly good fellow # Which nobody can deny. (coughing) For bravery and the rather thick-headed willingness to sacrifice himself for his fellow man, Bath Opera is proud to present you with the first Golden Appendix Award, in hopes for a speedy return to the stage. (crowd cheers) Yay. (laughs): Oh, my God. (hoarsely): Thank you so much. I can't talk. My voice... Speak up. Can't hear you. JULZ: How about you write it down, and I'll read it out, yeah? "My whole life, "I've struggled to make friends. "Now I have an entire company. "From the bottom of my heart, thank you." Next drink's on the company. -(cheering) -Good to have you back. -Hip-hip! Hip-hip! -Hooray! Hooray! Get me half a lager, will you, babe? I'm just going to the loo. So, how's he doing? Well, he's heartbroken, but we'll see. Here's the recording of "Aida" at least. The one he made before the performance. So he can have his voice back whenever he likes. Oh, thank you. Thanks. He'll love that. PAUL (over speakers): # Aida # # Magic in beauty # Glowing with light # Like some fair planet # You shine above me # You are the ruler of my whole life. # 5 (horns honking, doorbells jingle) BRADDON: No, it's not about the individual. It's about the whole Carphone Warehouse family, and I, for one, am thrilled to be a part of that family, so thank you. No, thank you. -Who was that? -Who was what? Who was that? That? Oh, that was just my boss up at HQ in Croyden, very wise man, who's seen fit to give me a raise. A raise? What? Why? What do you mean, why? I'm a stupendous manager. I feel a sudden urge to sing. Oh, God, please don't. Now, look, don't take this the wrong way, right? And I mean this in no way personally towards you, but you know that you're a crap manager. You know that and I know that, but if you must know, over the last two quarters, our little shop has had the highest sales in all of Wales. # The highest sales in all of Wales. # That's amazing. What, you mean in the six months -since I got back from my surgery? -Yeah, well... In which time I've kept the shop open -from 10:00 till 6:00... -Yes. ...sometimes later, and I put the ad in the local paper and the one online. All right, blimey! I'm trying to tell you you're getting a raise as well. Am I? Couple of quid an hour. Are you serious? BOTH: # The highest sales in all of Wales. # (holding note) What? (gasps) Oh, my God. Oh, my God, I can... I can sing. (chuckles) I can sing. You can sing? I can sing. I can... # The highest sales in all of Wales... # Little pitchy. Up a half. BOTH: # The highest sales in all of Wales... # -(laughter) -He's back! I can sing! Mrs. Evans! -I can sing! -Jolly good. Hey, tell your mum I'll see her at bingo. Will do! # In all of Wales! Julz! Julz, I can sing! What? # I can sing... (tyres screeching) Oh, my God. (indistinct announcements over P.A.) So, you've shattered your collarbone, broken four ribs and dislocated your pelvis. But he'll be able... He won't be running a marathon anytime soon. Hard to tell when he'll even be back on his feet. Cameron? Oh, you have got to stop doing this to me. (Bocelli singing over TV) (door opens) JULZ: Hello? Hiya. (groans) Tired I am. Today's been hectic. You all right? Good day? Same as yesterday, really. Oh, Paul, what's with all the washing up? It's the one thing that... Sorry. Right, any idea what you want for tea? Well, I just had a sandwich, so... Oh, babe. -What? -It'd just be nice to eat together for a change, wouldn't it? Now you're not gonna see me all weekend, so... -Why? -Because Sean's asked me to do overtime, and we can't afford for me not to. -(doorbell rings) -Oh. (TV switches off) -Oh, babe, this is ridiculous. -Shut up. -Shut... Shh. -We can't be doing this every time -the blinking door goes. -Yeah, but if the bailiffs come, they'll come and take the TV, won't they? So shh. -(doorbell continues) -Well, you know what? If they do, they do. I'm gonna answer it. -No, don't you dare. Don't you... -Shut up. -Shut up. -Come back, Julz, no. -(doorbell continues) -You're my wife. (groans) It's just Braddon. (sighs) Tell him I'm not here. What? Tell him I've gone to Spain. BRADDON: I can actually hear you. (sighs) Ta-da! Feast your eyes upon the south-western district sub-manager for Carphone Warehouse. -You are not. -I am. Jesus, your failure-to-success ratio is miraculous. Carphone Warehouse recognizes talent when they see it. Plus, the old district manager died of a heart attack. High five. All of which means that I am looking for someone to fill these rather spectacular, genuine leather, convenient, Velcro-fastening boots. I'm not sure I'm up to it. -Bollocks. -No. You're on disability for over a year, they've cut up most of your credit cards, and poor Julz. (horn honking) Anytime this year? You two back together? Been about a week now. I told her about the company Ford Mandeo, and she was putty in my hands, weren't you, love? Don't be a prick, Braddon. Sorry. So you're leaving today? I don't know if I can, honestly. You-you don't know how many pills -I'm having to take every day. -Paul, Paul, Paul, Paulie Wally Wally, I've created a legacy. I've established a truly magical workplace. I just can't hand that on to anyone. Plus, we've signed up for an Elf and Hobbit weekend in the Valleys. I'll miss you, bud. You're my best mate. There, I said it. (chuckles) Rubbish. Sub-uber under-district managers don't have time for such emotions. It's district sub-manager, and I'll be popping around every now and again to check up on you. Make sure there's no funny business going on. Remember, with great power comes great responsibility. You laid around too long, Pottsy. Time to get on with it. Mad love. (ignition sputtering) May the... Little bit more throttle, maybe. I know. -May the... -(engine starts) -(horn honks) -Now rev it. -May... -(engine stops) Oh, for God's... I'm missing "Deal or No Deal" for this. -(engine starts) -There we are, then. May the Flame of Avedon sustain you. JULZ: How was your first day, then? Yeah, brilliant. Any luck with the hiring? No. But it'll be better when we get an ad in the paper. (water running) (Paul singing in Italian) Pressure caused the number five furnace to literally split down the side. -Oh, my Lord. -Molten steel running everywhere. 1,800 degrees. Damn near burned half the machinery before we got the fire out. Gosh. Was anyone hurt? Billy Watkins was almost incinerated, but lucky for him, Paul's friend, Matthew, was able to hoist him out of the pit before the soup got him. Not my friend. -He's a bloody hero. -Good for him. Anything exciting down at the shop, love? Hang on, love. Whatever disagreements you had when you were at school, -don't you think... Yes. -Disagreements? Disa... Do you see that, Dad? -Paul! -That's from a bicycle chain wrapped around his fist while two of his droogs held me down. I was 12. I don't remember that happening. And what was it you said to me at the time? Maybe if I lost a couple of stone, I wouldn't provoke him. Maybe nothing's changed. (sighs) Life doesn't owe you any favours, son. Don't you think it's time you stopped feeling sorry for yourself? We've all got on with life. -What makes you different? -"We've all got on"? You've got on with your life, have you, Dad? How many times do we have to hear about Gareth Edwards' bloody clavicle? You're telling me you don't wake up every day and regret not pushing yourself further? You watch yourself. I had a wife and child to support. Yeah, and I've been paying for it ever since, 'cause you didn't have the courage to go out -and take a chance. -Oh, yeah? And what chance are you taking? Eh? How brave are you being? Moping at home while your wife works two jobs to pay your bloody rent. What's your dream? Employee of the month at Carphone Warehouse? Oh, that's some dream. You are afraid to sing and you're afraid to get past it. So don't you lecture me about giving up! Come on, Yvonne. I'm not sitting here listening to this. I'm sorry. Right, so if we consolidate it all into one monthly payment, it's 149 pound a month for four and a half years. And we've got Council Tax. (sighs) I don't know how we're gonna do this. We'll be fine. Maybe Dad was right. Oh, sod your dad. (computer beeps) Oh, my God, these bloody pop-ups. Yeah, what is that? Some talent competition where the best performer in Britain gets 100,000 pound. Well, Robbie Williams is gonna win that, isn't he? Yeah. I think it's for amateurs, babe. Shame you stopped singing, then. Could've won that laughing. (water running) Well, it's cheaper than a lottery ticket. You serious? I don't know, am I? Am I being stupid? No! No, no, do it. No, forget it. You've got a wonderful voice. I had a wonderful voice. I heard you the other day in the shower. You still sound beautiful to me. It would be good to sing in front of an audience again. I mean, I could probably move on after that. Right, so do it. I just can't bear to be humiliated. Not again. You won't. You won't be humiliated. Toss a coin? What? Toss a coin. Heads, I press send. Tails, we forget all about it. Right. (laughs) Oh, my...! I can't believe you just did that! What are you gonna sing? (singing scales) (matching note to piano) How long has it been? (sighs) Nearly two years. Hmm. I'd have guessed longer. (singing in Italian) (dog squeaks) (whimpering) -(singing in Italian) -(typing) (groaning vocal exercises) Thank you. Yes, please. (squeaking) (singing scales) (singing scales) (phone ringing) Hiya. They said yes! What? Well, "Britain's Got Talent," they said yes! They want you to audition this Saturday. Babe, they want you to sing! Bugger. 4 (alarm beeping) (alarm stops) How are you feeling, then? Like I shouldn't be doing this. Oh, come on. You'll be great. Something bad's gonna happen; it always does to me. (sighs) Hello and welcome to "Britain's Got Talent," the show that sets out to find Britain's brightest new acts and change their life forever. Heading up the judging panel is Mr. Simon Cowell. ANT: Actress Amanda Holden is one of the country's most loved actresses. WOMAN: Complete cock-up, I'm afraid. Simon's tossed out three of the acts, so everything's been bumped up. As long as I've got time to properly warm up. -How long do you need? -Ten minutes should be fine. Well, take away five from that and you're perfect. What, I'm on in five minutes? Four and a half, actually. These should take you through to your reserved seats. Follow us down the hall and up the stairs. -Come on, hurry. -No, this was a mistake. -Hey, you can warm up in five. -No, I can't. -I haven't got enough time. -Of course you can! I think we may have a problem. We don't have a problem. He can warm up in four minutes; he can warm up in two minutes. I mean, my God, he was born screaming at the top of his lungs and he shattered half the windows in Wales with his gorgeous voice. I hardly think that now, when he's finally been asked to perform again, is the time to go silent. -No, I think we're gonna be okay. -It's been proved I'm not good enough. Let's just go home, all right? Hang on. Proved by who? -Pavarotti? -Well, yeah. That was ages ago, Paul. This is it. This is your chance. Four minutes. Yes or no? -Yes! -Yes! PAUL: I'm really not ready. I honestly need more time than this. (applause) PIERS: Hello, what's your name? I'm Michelle and these are my children. Just get your puckered old bum to a telly. Do you hear me? (scoffs) Honestly, if he wasn't such an exquisite lover, I'd have to leave the man. (audience laughing) Begin with # Do, re, mi # Doe, a deer # A female deer # Ray # A drop of golden sun -(buzzers blaring) -# Me, a name # # I call myself. SIMON: You look happy, Mrs. Bunkle. They look completely miserable. The singing was terrible, by the way. Can we make it their last ever performance? I can't do this. He didn't have to be that cruel, but he was right. SIMON: I surrender. You couldn't smile just once? Wouldn't want to follow that. Thanks. I think Paul's next. Oh, dear. DEC: For the next contestant, the world of show biz seems a million miles away. It's Paul, a mobile phone salesman from South Wales. PAUL (over speakers): By day I sell mobile phones, but my dream is to spend my life doing what I feel I was born to do. -Juggling pies. -(laughter) You've got to see this. Holy crap, Pottsy. ...I struggle with. Um, confidence is... has always been a difficult thing for me. I always find it a little difficult to be completely confident in myself. I get nervous... -Oh, gosh. -...every time I have to sing in front of anyone. It's... Nerves have got the best of me in the past. I wish I didn't have them, if I'm honest. -(phone vibrating) -But the truth is, I've never felt more nervous than I do today. Right, you're on. (applause) You're on. One foot and then the other. AMANDA: Don't hold much hope for this. (light laughter) Good afternoon, I'm Paul. Paul, what are you here for today, Paul? To sing opera. (crowd laughing, groaning) Okay, ready when you are. ("Nessun Dorma" playing) (sighs) (singing in Italian) (crowd cheering) (singing continues) (cheering continues) (music swells) -(holding note) -(crowd cheering) (cheering continues) (music ends) So you work at Carphone Warehouse. (laughter) And you did that. -I wasn't expecting that. -No, neither was I. This was a complete breath of fresh air. I thought you were absolutely fantastic. (crowd cheering) PIERS: You have an incredible voice. I think if you keep singing like that, you are gonna be one of the favourites to win this whole competition. (crowd cheering) AMANDA: I think that we've got a case of a little lump of coal here that's gonna turn into a diamond. (crowd cheering) Okay. Moment of truth, young man. Piers? Absolutely yes. (crowd cheering) Amanda? Yes. Paul, you are through to the next round. Congratulations. Thank you. (crowd cheering) That was really good. -(laughs) -Well done. Well done, son. (laughs) Bloody wonderful. (crying) You're all right. (sniffles) (both laughing) What kind of poof sings opera, anyway? Not exactly a chip off the old block, is he? A bicycle chain? Aye, well, it was only kid stuff. (others gasp) Get him out of my sight. Ah, Matt, not laughing anymore, eh? Come on, boys. The drinks are on me. PAUL (voice-over): As it turns out, I made it to the semi-final and the final. And the judges were right. I did go on to win "Britain's Got Talent." And in the hectic weeks and months that followed, I recorded my first album, went on my first record tour, and was even invited to sing for the queen, which allowed us to pay off all our debts and still have enough left over to buy a nice little house back in Port Talbot where Julz and I still live. -(door opens) -ROLAND: Here you go. Freshly pressed. Thanks. There's, uh... there's something I want to tell you. I know I haven't always been the best of fathers. Dad, you don't have to say anything... Oh, shut up and let me do the singing for once. The only... real measure of a father's success is by how far his children end up surpassing him in life. And you... You can be very, very proud of yourself. Come on, you two! We'll keep the queen waiting? (sighs) ANNOUNCER: And now, from the Royal Albert Hall, the winner of "Britain's Got Talent," in his first performance for Her Majesty the Queen, an extraordinary singer whose first album has already sold over two million copies -(exhales) -and reached number one... You nervous? Always. Hey, one foot then the other. -Go on. -Ladies and gentlemen, please give a warm welcome to Mr. Paul Potts. (applause) PAUL (voice-over): The truth is I'm still just that little boy from Wales who always wanted to sing. Though I was persuaded to get a new haircut, buy some new clothes, and, oh, yeah, make one other small change. In the years since then, Julz and I have travelled together all over the world. But there's one special place I always wanted her to see. You've got to feed the birds for good luck. Can we get any luckier? PAUL (voice-over): So there it is. The whole story. The opera of my life. Not a bad one, is it? www.able.co.nz Captions were made possible with funding from NZ On Air. Able 2015