d The sperm's coming down. We take up a little bit of the cytoplasm. Yeah, I-I've always wanted kids, but I didn't want them when I was young. You know, I knew I'd have them one day. The dream of having a child seems the most natural thing in the world. But infertility affects nearly one in four couples at some stage in their lives. I wasn't looking forward to the stress of her saying, 'No egg, no egg, no egg.' (LAUGHS) I don't care whether you feel like it or not. You just gotta do what you need to do. One more follicle to go, OK? It's the last one. > (GROANS) It's all looking fine now. For many, the realisation that there is a problem is the beginning of a journey filled with hope. Currently a donor at the fertility clinic. Yep. But it's a journey with no guarantee of success. Mm, so there's a chance. Yeah, we've got a chance after four years. But eight couples dealing with infertility have allowed us to follow their stories over the last two years. And this week, the McCabes, the Hills, the Porters and the Rudges are joined by the Bennetts, five-year veterans of the struggle they all hope will lead to the ultimate success ` a healthy child. I can't imagine my life without a kid. I still see children however... it comes about. LILTING TECHNO MUSIC Copyright Able 2016 Introducing Alan and my wife, Hansi. And welcome to our fertility journey. We came from similar backgrounds. Yeah, our families` Yeah we both come from Christian homes. I started going to the church in Raglan and... ...her uncle actually said there's a good dairy farmer in church for her. (LAUGHS) He did, actually. It just kind of went from there. We started going out and then got engaged and got married. Yeah. I'd always wanted to be a mum. I went to teacher's college but only because that was, like, the buffer between meeting someone and having a family. I'd been on the pill for a while anyway, just to manage my` my endometriosis. And so I came off the pill and I kind of thought it would just happen. And about six months, nothing had happened, and my periods were getting quite bad. I went to the doctor, and the doctor straight away referred us to Fertility Associates. And they said it was just covered` You know, everything was just covered in endo, and then they said that the most` the best course of action would be IVF. Cos I was a farmer, I just thought it was like artificial insemination and I just thought, 'Oh I've seen thousands of that in cows,' and I thought, 'I know about breeding.' I know if a cow's not cycling, she's dirty,... (CHUCKLES) ...so you give her some drugs, and that cleans her up, and then you just do AI` Oh, you synchronise her. You give her an injection She comes on heat that day, then you do the AI, and she's in calf. And I thought, 'Oh, it must be the same sort of thing with a person.' (LAUGHS) Through the process of IVF, Hansi and Alan produced four viable embryos, but when they were transferred to Hansi's womb, all four lead to the same result ` a failed pregnancy. Genetic testing revealed the cause. So there's nothing wrong with my genetic make-up, but when I produce the eggs, it reverses the arm on chromosome 18, which is likely to cause miscarriages. So they never had a chance, the embryos. I know our place will be a great place for kids to grow up with all the paddocks and the stream and trees and country lifestyle. Hansi and Alan were told they needed to find an egg donor. But all the clinic could do to help find one was to keep Hansi and Alan's profile on their system. most people don't just go and say randomly that they wanna be a donor and pick you from your profile, and there's other people waiting. So she said most people advertise and get a friend or a friend of a friend or a family member to do it. That's how it likely` most likely happens. And I was like, 'oh, dammit.' We don't really wanna advertise. They said, 'Oh make a Facebook thing.' It's, like, nah we don't really want to do that. It doesn't really sit right with us. It just feels weird, like, asking people, 'Can I have your eggs?' (CHUCKLES WEAKLY) So we just let it go, like... Just totally forgot about it. A year later, Hansi and Alan's profile was chosen by a prospective egg donor. So, this person who decided to donate eggs, she'd finished her family and felt she wanted to gift something to someone that couldn't have a family. It will still be` it will be our baby because it's my sperm and the donor egg, but Hansi is carrying it. It's got Hansi's blood supply; its going to be inside her; it's going to be picking up on her personality. So it's gonna be her baby. We've just had a little help getting there. I can't imagine my life without a kid in it. It's not an option yet. It's not something I wanna` I'm considering. I still see children, however it comes about. LIGHT-HEARTED STRING MUSIC It's been three years since we found out that we, um, you know, needed IVF. Four years since we started trying, and, like, here we are, actually doing it. You almost feel like you're in Breaking Bad, eh? David has a genetic condition that means that the only way his sperm and Teresa's eggs can get together is through in vitro fertilisation. His sperm have already been extracted and frozen, and Teresa has been injecting herself with drugs to maximise her egg production. So, the other one we take at night-time, it's obviously promoting the` the follicles and getting it all happening, Um, and this is the one that's stopping her releasing her eggs until she gets the trigger shot Shit, that was a big drop. OK, I might just s-sit here for a second. (LAUGHS) That` So it can't get out. When Teresa and David got together, she already had a son, Kingston, from a previous relationship. But another child would complete their family. Yummy. Careful; it's hot. He's very keen for a little brother. It's funny. He used to give us, um, pretty much every week, a new, like name ` what to name the baby. We are lucky enough to be able to get publicly funded for, um, our first two rounds. We'll do three rounds, including the two, and then that will be us. Just cause of the financial cost, the emotional cost ` we wouldn't want to just put ourselves through it for years and years, would we? 7 times 5? 35. There are just some many things that you can't control and` you know, what if they unfreeze the sperm and it's not moving? I'm nervous about egg collection cos it's a lot more, uh, invasive I suppose. You're really exposed and vulnerable. You know, you're lying in a bed drugged up with your legs on stirrups. Like, it's a bit nerve-racking. GENTLE GUITAR MUSIC Morning, guys. Hey. Morning. Good to see you. Good to see you again. Come on through. The first thing we check is the lining of your womb. So, that's where the embryo will eventually go. So that's 12mm. That's looking good. Now we are going to head across to the right ovary. You can see here all these black circular structures. They're the follicles that you've been working on growing. So, we're going to measure the larger ones of these now. So we've got 17. > Is that big? That's, uh, close to the size we want, actually. > Followed by a 16. What I'm really pleased about is this is looking neither too much or too few. It's, you know, just the right amount, really. > My thinking is that we're gonna give them a couple more days to grow, because the aim is to get mature eggs here, so it's a bit like the bunches of grapes on a vine. we want to ripen them just a little bit further. Two more days. Mm-hm. But the plan is going to be that we'll give you the trigger injection on Saturday, and your egg collection'll be on Monday. OK. All right. Cool. One of the key things about IVF is knowing when to go ahead and collect the eggs. They're very close. Hard to predict egg numbers, but I think they're gonna do well. f QUIRKY MUSIC We're going in for egg collection this morning. It's funny. Like, after four years of trying this` like, this week has been a real whirlwind. Like, you're on the outside looking in. Really anxious and nervous as well to see what` you know, what the number of eggs are like and what quality they are and how well, I suppose, the sperm will unfreeze and come back to life. So it's, uh, fingers, toes, legs, arms ` everything crossed from now on. OK, we're just going to go into the theatre now. All right, Teresa, I'm about to give you the first drug. Nice, deep breathes. That's the way. Feeling nice and relaxed? A little bit. It works quite quickly. Now, Teresa, we're gonna get underway shortly. > It will be a little bit sharp to start with, and then it will ease off, OK? > Quite firm pressure like that, and then in a moment you'll feel a li` a little bit of a nip. > (GASPS) Nice deep breath. Well done. Well done. That's it. > And breathe out. Now, that should wear away to a dull ache now, OK? You're doing really really well. Well done. OK. First egg. First egg. There we go. Number one. Second egg. So, these eggs are coming away easily, which is a good sign. We're nearly finished the first side here. > Just concentrate on your breathing, OK? (SOBS) Nearly there. Just about there. One more follicle to go, OK? That's the last one. > You're doing really good. (GASPS, GROANS) That's it, OK? There we go. We're finished. > That's it. Well done. You can relax now. You did really well. Just let your knees roll out. > That's it. Final count is five. We'll know how those eggs have gone by tomorrow morning, > and we'll be able to plan when to` when to be looking at your transfer. As long as we've got five swimmers from our previous adventure, we'll be fine, which I'm sure we will. The egg collection was brutal. Um, I didn't expect it to quite be as full-on as it was. And, yeah, it was... brutal. Yeah, I hated to` um stand there watching her go through it. Um, she did fantastic. She did really well. Um, but, yeah, it wasn't something I would like to do again. Yeah I would, like, have preferred more drugs. (LAUGHS) Yeah, I` My` My friend had said to me a few days before that, yeah, it's` you know, it's really painful. And it was funny ` we were talking to the embryologist and she'd said, 'Oh, some people, 'you know, people giggle and, like, go to sleep,' and I was like, 'No. no. That's, like... no.' (LAUGHS) Yeah it was` Yeah, it was really sore. So before I even do anything with the eggs, I've just got to check and make sure that we've got motile sperm. Sometimes after you've thawed the sperm out, it takes a wee while for the sperm to regain their motility. So, this sperm here, so this is, uh, a motile sperm, but not a particularly attractive one because it does have a cytoplasmic droplet in the middle there. Here's another fellow. A bit more life to this one. The amazing thing about the sperm is that almost all of it is abnormally formed. That's just what happens when you've got surgically retrieved sperm, and yet we have completely normal babies come from it. But we also want to try and get the best sperm possible to, um, inject these eggs with. The sperm's coming down. We take up a little bit of the cytoplasm until that membrane breaks. So these eggs will be kept overnight now, and then tomorrow morning, we'll check them for fertilisation, and then we'll see how things go from there. They called and said that all five had been fertilised, so 100% fertilisation rate is, like, pretty awesome, and you're so happy, but at the same time, you know that, you know, the next day could be all of them gone. Like, it's a real... I don't know, you just, sort of, have to take every day as it comes. GENTLE GUITAR MUSIC Hi, so, I'm at work in my classroom. Early morning because term four is always really full-on for teachers, and on top of that I am trying to do this IVF cycle. So feeling a little bit stressed this morning trying to get paperwork done for appraisals and reports written and not be stressed about the cycle, and they say the best thing is to not be stressed, so I'm not really sure how you're not supposed to be stressed. We're here for a scan, checking the lining ` I guess making sure it's a good home for the baby. From now, things can go wrong. You know, working with the egg donor, I don't really know. It's two people trying to get in sync and just knowing that in the past, you know, we haven't had fertilisation before, and it's, just, those anxieties come back. Knock, knock. Hello. Good morning. Hi, Hansina. I'm Kirsty. We have meet before. Yes, we have. I'm doing your scan today. So, I'll just get you to bend your knees up for me. Thank you. I'm just going to insert the ultrasound probe now, OK? Yep. So, we're just looking at the uterus here, and this is the lining of the uterus here. That's, um, 8mm, which is looking perfectly normal and good development at this stage. That's what it should be. And everything else is looking fine. The ovary here is quiet, so... So, our donor, she didn't get her period the day that they expected, and these things happen, so we're a bit` a few days behind. It's kind of a bit stressful, because you're thinking, 'Oh, I hope everything goes well, 'and we get good eggs.' And I know that she's doing, like, two injections a day, and I feel like, oh my goodness, poor thing. (LAUGHS) Yeah. For yeah, just as a gift, what she's going through. Yeah. So, her scan is on Wednesday, and then they'll determine her follicle size, and then probably egg collection sometime next week, and then from there, five days after that will be embryo transfer ` if all goes to plan. LAID-BACK MUSIC It's looking a bit sad. On the Wednesday, my donor had a scan, and then Thursday they wanted me to call urgently, and the nurses said that she only had two follicles that were producing a mature egg, and it's not... really financially viable to go ahead because the chances are` you need a better number of eggs to have success. Two isn't a good number. They said the donor was happy to try again in the New Year and that we don't lose our public funding cos it didn't` it wasn't a complete cycle. I went into the` off the staff room and had a bit of a cry. I didn't even go home because there was no one to take my class, so I had to stay at work, which was not... easy. Hansi came home from school and just, of course, upset and needed to talk and` which was good that I was here to let her unload. Yeah so` And it` it affects me as well you know, you` people don't realise just how much it affects the extended family, and we were just so excited about this whole process and just hanging onto that whole faith thing, yeah, and that` that helps us, and I just really honour the egg donor that she's willing to go through the process. And I just hope that it's not going to be too much and she'll wanna go through it again, cos it's quite a big toll. And whether her family want to go through it again cause in the heat of the moment on Thursday, it's all well and good to say, 'Yeah, yeah, yeah, we'll` we'll do it again. We'll try.' And after a few days of thinking` Yeah, so that's my` I'm just` I'm a bit anxious. Our first time, that was really gutting. We had six embryos fail, that didn't even fertilise. That was gut wrenching, but this is, uh` It's not over. It's just a delay. SOFT STRING MUSIC Here is what I take every morning mostly of every day. Uh, it's quite a menagerie of vitamins and supplements. Um, I know it looks quite excessive, but I must say that I do feel really good at the moment. The reason for Mel and Justin's infertility is unknown. Mel's tried using clomiphene to regulate her ovulation and has had a laparoscopy. So the next thing to check was the quality of Justin's sperm. It was interesting, cos it was` Uh, it's the first time I've had to do a sample like that, and to go in there, and there's, like, a couch, and there's, like, towels which you can put down, and there's a draw with a laminated sticker that says magazine, and I'm worried about why it's laminated. (LAUGHS) Um... Yeah, I felt really bad for him, because it must just be so awkward. It's` You know, in a strange environment and there are people walking past, and you can hear people talking. And there's like` and the nurse goes and gives you the little plastic tubby and a form to fill out, and she goes, 'Here's this. Here's that. Provide your sample here and remember to lock the door.' (LAUGHS) OK. Ugh! And then` And then afterwards you go` you go and you put it in this little, like,... area. You put it down, and you`you ring a bell, and it's just the most awkward, like, bing-bong! I have delivered for you. BOTH LAUGH Really? Yes. You had to` And then did they come in? And then the nurse comes out with rubber gloves and you're going, Jesus. BOTH LAUGH It's probably to stop cross-contamination. Of course. Yeah, I know, but still, I was like, 'Oh, thank you.' Aww. f GENTLE TECHNO MUSIC It's a little while since I've seen you guys. Yes. I was a bit concerned about, um, going into the next monitored cycle in terms of Justin's sperm sample, cos the last test he did was two years ago, um, and he` he came to do that test and the results weren't... Weren't as great as we were expecting. Well the first one was bad, and then the second one... Yeah, so in early August we had a sample where the, um, count was 8 million per ml. Now, I know 8 million sounds a lot, but that is below the lower limit of normal ` we say that should be more than 15 million ` and when our science team had a look at the swimming ability, uh, a lot of those swimmers were reasonably slow or` or just treading water. So you had a follow-up sample, and that was actually much better. Yeah. Uh, 24 million per ml, and, uh, over half of the swimmers were going in a forward direction. Given that the second sample was actually pretty good, one option would be just to go back to the plan we put in place in April, which is just to use some clomiphene to get you ovulating, use some more scientific monitoring, I suppose, you know, where we use some blood tests and scan to pinpoint more accurately when you might ovulate. OK. Cool. Cool, thank you. All right, let's go. Last time when we, uh, went on the clomiphene, we were in a different space. We were in a high` a lot more stressful jobs, both of us. And because we were doing the clomiphene and this was going to boost my ovulation, when it came to that week of ovulation I was, like, really full-on with Justin. If he didn't feel like it, like, that wasn't an option. I'm going to ovulate. The clomiphene's gonna get me pregnant. I don't care whether you feel like it or not. (LAUGHS) You just gotta do what you need to do. Which... It` It` It` Which is a lot of pressure. It takes` It` It sucks all the romance and, you know, intimacy out of a situation where you've got, like, an Excel spreadsheet and it's now and now and now. LAID-BACK GUITAR MUSIC At the age of 41 and with a history of severe endometriosis, Michelle knows IVF is the best chance for her and Ben to have a baby, so she has been having hormone injections to increase her egg production, and today will be her third follicle scan. Today, we find out just how my follicles are doing, just to make sure they have grown and hopefully schedule egg collection for Monday, so another three days away. I find the whole process kind of like playing a video game, because the further you get into it, the more pressure and the more nerves and the more excitement, but anything could go wrong at any time, and you have to start again, you know. (CHUCKLES) The further you get into it, the more you have to lose, you know. So, you've had a couple of scans before? Yep. So we're looking first of all at your uterus, and uh, I'm just going to measure the endometrium. OK. Sue, what was the endometrial thickness on the last scan? It was 9.7 last time. All right. So it looks as though there's been some good progress, then. > And that` that's 12mm now, effectively. So, now we're looking at the right ovary. That's good. So, we've got a 14, Sue. Three that are the region of 9mm. How long have you had endometriosis for? > < About 15 years. Yes. I've had four laparoscopies. Have you? There's no doubt that Michelle has responded a little bit slower than was expected. She was slow to get off the mark, and the` you know, the follicles that have grown on the ovary have been slow to grow, uh, as well, and clearly she's had really severe endometriosis as we can see from examining the previous operation notes. Um, you know, she's got all the hallmarks of the severest variant of endometriosis with cysts on the ovaries and, uh, possibly a bit of damage to the fallopian tubes. Come just have a seat here. That's great. All right. I think we'll probably want to scan you in another couple of days as a sort of, hopefully, a final scan, preliminary, um, before the egg collection, but it will be based on the blood test result from today as well, so we'll clarify that a bit later on. OK, yep. So, they thought the egg collection might be on Monday but at this stage...? Yeah I think it's` you know, that's probably not gonna happen at this stage. It'll probably be more towards the middle of the week. OK. Yeah. Yep. OK? Yep, that's cool. Great, great. So it's a bit of a day-by-day thing, this. Yeah, yeah. All right, cool. Goody-good. Uh, I'm kind of disappointed that we didn't` Like, I'd all planned for having Monday off, egg collection on Monday, but that's what I like about this process is that they'll check you every couple of days and make sure you're at the optimum time for egg collection, not before and not after, so, yeah, it's kind of like, oh, you know, a pain that we have to wait a couple more days, but, you know, that's a small, small price to pay. UPBEAT MUSIC Today is embryo transfer, um, so it's time to put another one back in. Excited? Yeah, quite excited, but nervous at the same time, eh? I think it's funny that we're getting pregnant today. Yeah, and without the fun. (LAUGHS) With a room full of people. This is how our embryology is looking. Here is our five embryos along here. This embryo here is our standout today. This is the embryo that we are going to transfer. We've chosen what appears to be the best embryo back today, day three, but we're going to check those other embryos on Saturday and Sunday. And if they've continued to develop really well, then there's a reasonable chance that there'll be some other embryos to freeze. With regards to this morning, the key thing is, uh, getting the embryo in exactly the right place, and so we achieve that through getting Teresa to have a full bladder. With ultrasound, you` you need, um, a bit of fluid to transmit the sound waves through to get a really clear picture. So, I'm going to be putting the embryo right about where I've put that arrow. OK. OK, I'm just gently advancing the inner catheter now. (GASPS) See that little wee jump there? Nice job. Whoo-hoo. (CHUCKLES) Can you see that sort of white dense area right in the middle? That's the bubble with your embryo. Now don't worry, you can't wee that out. (LAUGHS) OK, it's tucked up safe. The thought did cross my mind. Yeah, everyone worries about that. I've got a picture of our` our baby. (LAUGHS) So, that` All eight cells of it. (LAUGHS) That just got put in. It's very exciting. It's funny, though, cause you want to enjoy` Like you're getting pregnant, so you want to enjoy the, you know, getting to watch. (LAUGHS) But no, all I was just like, 'OK, don't pee, don't pee.' It's so crazy that after, like, yeah, four years, we're, like, mm, there's a chance. Yeah, we've got a chance after four years. Nervous tears. We've got to get through the next two weeks before we find out if it works. But it'll be fun. (LAUGHS) I think that's the hardest part about IVF treatment. You know, you put a really nice embryo into a perfectly prepared womb, and everyone kind of has the expectation that, well, what can go wrong from here? But of course at the moment it's just a ball of cells. It's gotta continue dividing. It's got to survive the maternal immune system. It's got to implant. It's got to interact with Teresa's, um, blood supply. A whole lot of things have to go right that are just totally up to nature. f GENTLE PIANO MUSIC That they're saying I have unexplained infertility. There's no` Well, they haven't yet found any physical or hormonal reason why I shouldn't have got pregnant by now. So that's the thing that frustrates me the most as a, sort of, fix-it type of a person ` there's not an identifiable fix. You know, there's nothing that I can control or that I can, yeah, do to sort my own problem. Leah and Mel already have a child ` Mel's son, Liam, from a previous relationship. But so far, Leah's attempts to get pregnant using a home-based sperm donor have failed, and the plan to try through the fertility clinic system has had to be put on hold. Our sperm donor emailed us saying he wasn't going to able to continue with us. He said his sperm didn't freeze and thaw well, which is what it would have to do for the clinic, so that was a little bit disappointing. So I called the clinic and asked about donors and was told that they didn't have any, um` any sperm there that we could be using. That we would have to either source our own again or switch to one of the other clinics that did have` have banks. Um, we're not able to switch to one of the other clinics; they're substantially more expensive, so we were back to having no donor. You know that felt like going back two years and starting all over again. So, this one? 34-year-old male. Already has a young kid. Currently a donor at fertility clinic. Yep. Don't have any desire to be involved with the child but could meet as` if` when the child is 18. Mm, that's fine. We'll put that one on the shortlist. One of the people we found online is willing to go through the clinic for us, which is fantastic. In the meantime, I've just started a weight-loss challenge at work, um, with a whole heap of my colleges, so that's` that's given me the motivation I've needed to, sort of, kick-start` start myself. Had a weigh in yesterday, and I've managed to lose 2 kilos in two weeks. I should hit my target about the right time before starting these treatments. The clinic had said no to our donor because they thought that, um, he had donated too many times, but that turned out to be a bit of miscommunication between the two clinics. He's helped two other couples. One was through a clinic, and one was not through a clinic. I think five is the cut-off that they are officially allowed to help ` five couples. We have to go and meet him at least once, um, so we can use him through the clinic. Yeah, so we don't really know what to expect. Little bit nervous. I don't know really we're just a bit... What do we say? A bit awkward. What do we talk about with this guy? But from his emails, he seems quite knowledgeable and he seems to know quite a lot about it, um, so hopefully we'll be able to let him do a lot of the talking and wish us luck. Off we go. Well this is, uh, the third Christmas since we started trying, um, so that's` you know, that's in the` in the back of your mind, and it's like, aw, could have had a toddler, but no. (LAUGHS) Still trying. How nice does it have to be on this side? Exquisite. There's a, um` There's an online forum for sperm donors. It took us a little while to find someone who was willing to go through a clinic for us. We met him, had coffee, had a chat. You know, talked through who we are and why we're doing it, and who he is and why he's` he's donating and a bit of stuff about his story, um, and, yeah, so the clinic seems to be happy with that. So he's` he's progressing through his processes as a donor, getting all of those boxes ticked, um, and we will shortly be able to start ticking some more of our boxes. We have to go in for a counselling session, um, in the next few weeks, which is` I think the ball is in our court at the moment, isn't it, to go in and do our counselling? And we also have to do a joint counselling with the donor and his partner as well. But the donations that he's made, um, they need to go into a six-month quarantine period. That's to check for HIV and a few other tests, so we've had, essentially, an enforced six-month stand down. LIGHT-HEARTED MUSIC So, it's day 17 since we started stimulation injections, and tonight is finally trigger-injection night. And so 10.30AM on Wednesday, we'll be, um, in the clinic for egg collection, so anyway, here's, uh... Jeepers. Yup. OK. (INHALES DEEPLY) Oh cool, and we are done for injections. GENTLE PIANO MUSIC MICHELLE: I'm not worried about the procedure, um, or anything like that. It's` It really is just wanting some eggs at the end of this. I'd just be gutted if there were no eggs or no viable eggs. So, I'm just going to give you the medication now, OK? OK. And, um, it's going to just go in intravenously, all right, so it will work quite quickly. That's quite nice. Is it working? You can feel it? Good. If throughout the egg collection you feel uncomfortable, > just let us know, and we can give you more. OK. (CHUCKLES) > OK, that's great. It's all in. OK, let's start on the right side. Just, uh, a sharp scratch. First egg. Lovely. That came out nice and easily, so that's good. You're not uncomfortable at all? > No. Great. Second egg. Fantastic. > Is this another new follicle? Yes. > MONITOR BEEPS Third egg. Fantastic. > All right, so unfortunately, nothing on the left side. But I think all the endometriosis on the ovary has affected its ability to, sort of, produce eggs. We collected three eggs easily, which is a good sign. But overall it ends up being, you know, how is the egg quality and that's what we'll see as, you know, fertilisation takes place and how the embryos develop in the lab. But, Michelle, you know, she's 41. She's got severe endometriosis. She's had the maximum stimulation, and we got three eggs. I think this is really good, uh, for Michelle. I actually just felt relieved when she said there's first, you know, one egg. I was like, 'Oh yay.' (CHUCKLES) We've` We've hit the big hurdle first. Like, I was kind of worried that they'd do one follicle, no egg; another one, no egg; no egg, no` oh egg, you know? So, once we've checked the sperm sample today and we check that we're happy with the count and motility of the sample, um, then we go ahead and we just put the sperm in the same dish as the eggs, and we leave the sperm overnight to make their own way to the eggs. Um, 18 hours after we've put the sperm and the eggs together, we check to see if the eggs have fertilised. We were quite, uh, hopeful about the three eggs, but we got the bad news yesterday morning that none of the three eggs had fertilised. So that's the end of this cycle for us. So it was a rough day. Um, so, (SIGHS) um, we have decided that we will go ahead and do another cycle, um, but because we have used up all of our public funding allocation, we're gonna have to pay for it ourselves. So there's gonna some serious saving going on and, uh` and probably a little bit of credit-card debt as well. Um, it's been rough to try and figure out if we were emotionally able to cope with another cycle and, uh` and financially, um, and` and it makes you really really figure out is this what you want? Do you really want this? And we really do. We do want a family. POIGNANT PIANO MUSIC Last time we were here was for egg collection. That was last Wednesday, and after getting three eggs, we then found that on the Thursday that none of the three had fertilised, so I was more disappointed and upset and all that kind of stuff, but I was also really annoyed. (LAUGHS) You know, annoyed that` that we didn't get through another stage in the process, because this process has so many stages, so many hurdles. It gets to a certain point, and then it all just hangs on this one little thing happening, and so it was kind of disappointing. Hi, Michelle. Hi, Ben. Shelley Riley. So, we've come today just to talk about your cycle and what the next steps would be. Great. Yeah, do you have any specific questions that you'd like to ask? Gazillions. (LAUGHS) No, I suppose I'd like to know what went wrong ` if you want to call it going wrong ` and what our next steps could be. Sure. You know, we did everything, really, to` to get as many eggs as possible. However, we did see quite a bit of endometriosis still within the ovaries. But despite that, we were able to obtain three eggs. < The next step, when the embryologist mixed the sperm and the eggs, there was no evidence of fertilisation. So the problem with your eggs is that they looked a little bit darker and more grainy than usual. Yep. And, also, this egg let all the sperm in. The idea is that zona, the area around the egg, only allows one sperm to get in for fertilisation. I'll just show you a photograph of some healthy eggs. Right, yep. See they're much clearer? Yeah. Also, you can see the pro-nuclei, which is when fertilisation occurs,... OK. Yep. ...and this wasn't showing in your` your eggs. Of course, your cycle's been reviewed by our medical director and laboratory director, and their feeling is that the endometriosis that was in the ovaries has affected the quality of your eggs. OK. So the next step would be to treat the endometriosis, to try and improve, you know, the likelihood of getting better eggs with another cycle of IVF. Yeah. Well so it would be` it would be another laparoscopy? Exactly. The big question for me now is the funding side of things. Because of my age, I only get one cycle. Because you haven't had an embryo put back,... Yeah. ...you're eligible for a further first cycle. TEARFULLY: Goody. < So that is great. That's amazing. That's really good. (LAUGHS) < Mm. Yeah. OK. (EXHALES) < And I think we need to get on with doing the surgery as soon as we can so that we can get on with, you know, doing your cycle again. Yeah. < Yeah. (SIGHS) Wow. And we do have lovely counsellors here, and I think it is worthwhile talking to them. Yeah. Because this will hit you and, you know. Yeah, that's` Yeah. < Yeah. It's a stressful journey, and you do need support, both of you, really. I had thought that because of the quality of my eggs they may go` they may not try and use my eggs anymore, and that would mean that I would` we would need to use a donor egg, and so we discussed if that was what we wanted, and we don't think that it's what we want. Right from the start, we thought it's either going to be us or nothing, you know. And we're OK with that. Though we want a child, it's not` it's not at the cost of everything. It's not at the cost of our marriage, ever. A child would be the icing on the cake not the be all and end all. UPBEAT MUSIC So I went for my pregnancy blood test this morning. We decided to ask Fertility Associates to send the results to Justin, uh, just because I didn't wanna get the phone call at work or a text at work. Oh, what a day. I know. How long did this take? It was, like, 9 o'clock was just a whole day. I'm exhausted. And, uh, I just feel that it'll just be a lot better for us to cope being together when we get the news. OK. (SIGHS) Right, I wanna see it. Let me read it to you. No, let me see it. READS: Hi, Justin and Melody. Sorry to give you this news, but the result came back as a negative. OK. SOMBRE PIANO MUSIC (SOBS) TEARFULLY: I really thought this could be it. WHISPERS: I did too. I just don't know what more we can do. Just keep doing what we're doing. We went for acupuncture every week, the supplements. I just don't actually` The fact that there is just no control over this whole thing is one of the hardest things, cos it just feels like, no matter what you do, it's just` You know, it doesn't matter what you do. I don't know how I'm gonna still be together if we get to IVF. No, no, let's... (SNIFFLES) (SIGHS) Let's just think about the next month and getting through that, and then we can think about that other stuff. It's` It's the thought of doing another monitored cycle with the clomiphene and everything. It's just really, really, really, really daunting. Come here. Come here. It'll be OK. It'll be OK, OK? It'll be OK. It'll be OK. QUIRKY MUSIC So, we've gotta go and get bloods done, and then we just wait for the call, so it's` I don't know, sitting around biting nails, um, while I'm waiting. Like, it's quite scary. Like the build-up is really crazy. You just feel nervous about all the feelings that that you know you're gonna have. It's really hard to imagine that we would be so lucky. I don't know how to explain it. Yeah, it's nerve racking. It could` It could just go either way. So they'll call my cell phone. That's what` That's all they've` The number they've called in the past. I don't know what time, which is awful. CELL PHONE CHIMES It's my sister. 'When do you get the results?' < I'd say they'll be a lot of that today. TENSE MUSIC CELL PHONE RINGS Hello? Oh! (SCOFFS) No. I need` I need the phone free. Yeah, I'll talk to you later. Yes. Bye. (CHUCKLES) Go away, Dad. He was Unknown. That was my dad. Oh, that's so cruel! (LAUGHS) If someone else rings, I'm gonna be so cross. CELL PHONE RINGS Hi. Is` Is that David? Yes, it is. David it's Mary here calling from Fertility Associates. Hi. Hi. Hi. Oh, hi, is that you, Teresa? Yup, we've got you on speaker. Perfect. Good time for your results then. I've got some, um, really good news for you. That's a positive result today. (SOBS) SHAKILY: Thank you. (LAUGHS) Oh my God. (LAUGHS) Good job, you. (SNIFFLES) (SIGHS) Oh. Holy crap. (SIGHS) (LAUGHS) (LAUGHS, SOBS) Four years for that. (LAUGHS) Oh, this is so cool. That's so cool. (LAUGHS) (SNIFFLES) (LAUGHS) I'm proud of you.