BIRDSONG MOTORS HUM Are you going to let me in? Thank you. Shoot, I left the ticket in the car, I think. It's OK. It's under "Phillip Greenberg." It's just one? It's two shirts and a pair of pants. Do you mind if it is all ones? No problem. OK, sorry. Florence! Hi, guys. Let me put this stuff down. Hi, Mahler. Florence! We're going on vacation! I know. We're going to Vietnam. I know. But we will come back, right? We're not going to live there? No, that's why it's a vacation. Are you going to go with us? No, remember? I have to stay here. Why? Because I do. Why? Because the vacation is for family members only, so Mahler and I have to stay in LA. Mahler isn't coming? I want Mahler to come. Did you get the neck pillow? Yes. They didn't have those chocolate-covered rice balls. Did you try Trader Joe's? Yeah, and Bristol Farms. Were you able to find the liquid decongestant? Shoot! Sorry. I'm sorry. It's OK, Florence. Don't worry about it. It's fine. No, no, no. And can you tell the gardener to check the sensor on the sprinklers? I'll tell Carlos. There's a package I need you to mail to my father. What else? I don't need this many T-shirts. Did you tell her about your brother? My brother will be staying here. He might call you with things, questions or an errand or two. That's not a problem. He's coming in from New York. He just got out of the hospital. Is he sick? Not that kind of hospital. He had a nervous breakdown. Carol, come on. It's relevant. He's fine. Don't pack this skirt. He really is fine now. I mean, he's delicate, but... we're hiring him to do some work around the house. He's a carpenter. He's going to make Mahler a doghouse. He says he's going to. That'll look nice. We hope. Have a great trip, you guys. OK. And I'll call you if there's anything else, which I'm sure there is. It's no problem. I want you to come with us. And you'll confirm the car service and flight info for tonight? Yes, and I'll put the cars in the garage. OK, and we can call or e-mail. I'm sure there's e-mail in Vietnam. I think there's e-mail everywhere. I forgot to write you a cheque. What do we owe you now? Don't worry about it. It's three weeks... Oh, Florence, you have to speak up. I'm out of checks. I want Mahler to come. I know, I know, but it's fine. I'll give you cash in the meantime. No, no. Don't worry about it. It's really... It's better this way. Because then I don't spend it all at once. Are you sure? I'll leave it for you in the kitchen drawer before we go. I'll let my brother know. OK. OK. Bye. OK. I'll see you soon. It's OK. Let's say goodbye. Bye. Bye, Florence. Bye. 'Florence, it's Gina. I'm here. It's packed. 'Don't park on Alvarado, park on Montana.' Don't wander away. OK. Let's make a point of sticking together. OK. Can I borrow 40 bucks until tomorrow? Yeah. I was thinking this morning that I've been out of college now for as long as I was in... ..and nobody cares if I get up in the morning. Florence, it's time to go home now. I'm going to stay. I don't know... I just got out of a long relationship. This isn't a relationship. Right, I know. OK. Are you going to let me in? No. OK. PHONE RINGS Hello? Hi, this is Roger Greenberg. I'm Phillip's brother. 'Oh, hey.' Is this...Florence? 'Sorry. I'm quitting e-mail.' 'OK. Hi.' Um...there are people in the pool. 'That's Marlon and Peggy.' OK. 'Your brother and Carol let Marlon and Peggy use the pool.' Mmm-hmm. There's more than two. They don't come in the house. 'OK, thanks.' Um, your brother left a check for me. Is it OK if I come by? Yeah, I'll be here. LAUGHING AND CHATTER FROM POOLSIDE GLOCKENSPIEL TINKLES GLOCKENSPIEL MAKES NON-MUSICAL RACKET 'Dear American Airlines, 'I'm not much in the habit of writing letters of complaint. 'I think I could have lived, and did, 'with the distance between your rows. 'But my issue is not with the lack of legroom, 'it is instead with the quality of the buttons on the seats. 'When I depress my recliner button, I expect the chair to recline. 'At the very least, to move. 'This was not the case with Seat 26C on Flight 41 from JFK...' DOOR OPENS Hi, little Mahler baby. Hi, I'm Florence. I hope that this isn't a bad time. My cheque. No, I guess it's fine. OK. Do you want a treat? Come here. Come here. SHE GIGGLES His tongue's so scratchy. Good dog. MUSIC: "It Never Rains In Southern California" by Albert Hammond Remember how they used to play this on the radio every time it rained? I'm not sure. And if there was a fire, they'd play Burn Baby Burn. Or, what was it called? Disco Inferno. I don't think I know it. It's funny. Before your time, I guess. You have to see past the kitsch. I can see past it. Cool. Phillip said if you need anything, I can go pick you up groceries or things. I'm OK. You sure? It's not a problem. Well... I guess I could use some... things. Sure. Make a list. I'll be right back. I'm going to take him on a W-A-L-K. Oh, no. No, I got it. OK, cool. Bye. PHONE RINGS 'This is Ivan. Leave a message after the tone.' Ivan, it's Greenberg. How you doing, man? I'm in LA. I'm here, actually. In from New York City. 'So, give me a call. I'm staying at my brother's house. 'He's in Vietnam. He's... HE SIGHS 'I think he's opening a hotel there or something.' Give me a call, man. It'd be great to see you. LOW-FLYING PLANE HUMS "I write as a concerned citizen that has finally had enough "of the abominable traffic noise that has engulfed the city. "If you placed a police officer at strategically chosen corners of Manhattan, "it would result in the needed employment of crime fighters, "less crime and trafficking, and a lower contingent of horn-honkers. "If you're into green... (And who isn't?) "..it'll make for a significant reduction in noise pollution. "If they can do it in LA, a car culture if ever there was one, "I'm confident we can do it here in Manhattan." It's true. No-one really honks here. Yeah. In LA, they understand the horn is for emergencies only. In New York, it's a constant. Yeah. I don't know. I don't really recognise New York any more, you know? "You might be interested to know that in the relatively recently acquired state of Hawaii, "there's a law on the books that prohibits the honking of horns entirely. "Yours in hopes of green sound, Roger Greenberg." When did you get in? Only Monday. You're the first person I called. No, I didn't mean... No, I know. I was just saying. Right. How long you staying for? About six weeks. Can you imagine going to Vietnam? What, to fight? Well, to fight, too, but I just meant now. My brother and his wife are there on vacation. I don't know. Some people like to travel. That's my brother's wife's daughter, Sara. My step-sister? Niece. She's at UC Santa Cruz. Uh, no, thanks, man. I don't really drink any more. OK. Yeah, it's for the best. I've got into these Arnold Palmers. Iced tea, lemonade. Yeah, I don't have that. I thought I'd told you. I guess I think we talk more than we do. The beard is cool. Yeah. You know, it's a winter beard. I probably shouldn't be on the table here. Maybe don't sit on the speaker. Oh, sorry. So, what do you want to do today? Um, Beller's having a barbecue, which means, you know... Oh, what's he up to? He directs television. He calls me up with computer questions. What a dick. He always offers to pay. Yeah, still rude. Let's not do that. Uh... What else, man? We could get a drink at a bar, we could stay here. They have videos. Yeah. I think I saw Mannequin. And, uh, Gung Ho? I remember that being funny. Gung Ho's good. Yeah. It'd be interesting to watch it now. In the day? I meant now, like, you know... Oh, these days. Yeah. Now, as opposed to when it was made. Yeah, sorry. I'm not sure about these pants. They look flare-y to you? No, I think that's the style. I feel like I should have worn jeans. No-one's going to be dressed up at this thing. Fabula and I are on this trial separation. Oh. Uh-huh? It's a lot to go into. I feel terrible for Victor, you know. I'd love you to meet him. He's like a little person now. Yeah, I saw him a few years ago. Yeah, but now he's eight. He's like a friend. He's fun to hang out with. I'm glad you're here, man. It's good for me to get out like this. Want to put your blinker on? Casa de Beller. Keep going. Keep going. Keep going. What a fucking nightmare. Maybe we can park here. No, no, no. Let's go home. I shouldn't have let you talk me into this. It's a nightmare here. It's this kind of shit... I can't find a movie I want to go to in the fucking multiplex, or when I'm in Starbucks, I hear music I actually like. But we drove all the way out here. Let's have one drink. Is this a fucking children's party? Beller, how are you? I'm good. Hey, man. Johno. Hey, Greenberg, what are you doing out here? You know... Hey, Beth. Oh, my God. Hey. Should I know? Are you really big or something? No, Megan. I didn't know you were out here. I wasn't. How is Lenny? Oh, dude, or what about Your Grandma's Pussy? It's like Anaconda, with seven cards down. I'm fair to middling. You know. Leonard Maltin would give me two-and-a-half stars. I haven't seen you since, probably, like, 10 years ago. In his movie guide. Yeah, I think it was actually Matt Levy's wedding. I'm all shits and giggles today. Yeah. I think you'll find I'm pretty much all shits. It's sad about Matt Levy. Yeah. Wait, what happened? Oh, you didn't hear. He died. Texas Hold 'em is dead. It's dead. You know, that shit just makes your lips dryer. I know. There's Beth. She and Steven are getting a divorce. They were a cool couple. Are any of those yours? Yes, mine are the one in the bumblebee costume and the one in the devil costume. I think that's The Flash. All the men out here dress like children, and the kids dress like superheroes. Hi, Dad. Hey, sweet pea. Come to think of it, Steven's kind of a less Jewish-looking version of you. Less? I'm not even... I'm only half. Yeah, but you're doing this. What's...? I'm thinking small. Is this a Jewish gesture? I don't know. Beller, always with the self-hatred. You're sweating. I am. Yeah. Have you been to one of Eric's seders? Eric gave trees to Israel. Am I not allowed to joke about it? No, I know. I'm just saying, since you said "less Jewish-Iooking," because most people think I look Italian. And since my mum was actually Protestant, I'm not actually Jewish at all, so... Good to see you. What are you doing these days? You're in New York, right? Yeah. Making music? Haven't played music in years. I'm a carpenter, you know, for money. But right now, I'm really trying to do nothing for a while. That's brave at our age. I'm here for a few weeks at my brother's and... ..want to have a drink or something? Um... Sure. OK. 'Dear Starbucks, 'in your attempt to manufacture culture out of fast-food coffee, 'you've been surprisingly successful, for the most part. 'The part that isn't covered by "the most part" sucks.' 'Hello?' Florence, hey, it's Roger Greenberg. 'Hi. 'Sorry, I'm eating.' That's OK. You want to have a drink or something? 'Um... Sure. OK.' Um... Is there a bar you know we can go to? 'There's one near my apartment, but it's pretty lame.' OK. 'It's in Culver City. Do you want to meet me there?' I don't drive. Those are all kind of cheesy. You have the light. Oh. Oh. Oh... Do you mind if we stop by my house? I left my purse. Sorry. Do you need it? You don't have a girlfriend. You don't need a lot of calls or text. You need data ` for dating sites, like Honey Badger. (LAUGHS) You do have a girlfriend. You need less data and more calls ` lovey-dovey calls. # You make me... # You don't have a girlfriend again. She won't return your calls. You need more text. Things change. Now your Prepay can too. Get more of what you need and less of what you don't with Vodafone My Flex Prepay. I don't read enough. I'm such a bad reader. Is that you? Yeah, it's one of the rare times I was actually happy around my dad. Did you do that? No, that's my niece. It's good. She's four. I want to have a relationship with her, she's just not that friendly with me. You want to see? I got her these puppets for her birthday. They might be too old. They have sticks. Yeah. I'm sure they'll be fine. What do you have to drink? Um... Oh. OK, you don't want to go to the bar? It's Friday. The bars are probably full of bridge and tunnel people. Or whatever the LA version of bridge and tunnel is. Sorry. I don't really have... There's a Corona Light and some cheap tequila someone left here once. Shall we split the Corona? OK. SHE HICCUPS I get the hiccups when I first drink carbonation. Don't worry about it. I'm wearing kind of an ugly bra. It's like an ACE bandage. There's no clasp. Do you hear a train? Is that a train? I get kind of nerdy. Don't worry about it. Can we take it slow? I'm sorry, it's just that... I just got out of a long relationship, and I don't want to go from just having sex to just having sex to just having sex. Who's the third "just having sex"? You, if we had sex. OK, then who's the second? A guy I met at this gallery thing. You slept with him? Yeah, I did. How did that go? What do you mean? The sex? Yeah. Well... It was pretty awkward. What is that on your lip? What? Is that a...? Nothing. No, it's not a cold sore. You sure? Yeah, I picked it. Where's your bathroom? This is so annoying, but I have to call my friend Gina back. Sorry, it's just, if I don't call her back, then I'll be a bad friend. She's always got an emergency. I'm sure it's nothing. Uh, how far do you think it would be to walk? To your brother's? Way too long, like five miles. You can stay here. I have the dog and... I can drive you. This will only take a second. You have to call her right this moment? Won't she understand you're in the middle of a... No, no. I'll take you now. Sorry. You know, I... You don't have to do that. You've got your robe... Oh, no. It's not a problem. I can probably call a cab. OK. This is stupid. I'm singing this Saturday at this place on Orange and Sunset. I mean, if you feel like it. I know it's last minute. Oh, my friend Gina made the flyers and she wrote down the address wrong. I don't think... What time? Like 11:30. There's a lot of acts, so it's kind of hard to pinpoint. Don't feel obligated. We probably shouldn't do this again. I mean, you work for my brother. Yeah. And I'm really trying to do nothing right now. That's cool. And I've got to stop doing things just cos they feel good. 'A mental patient just went down on you.' Why do you say it like that? He's not crazy. 'Mmm-hmm.' A lot of people go to insane asylums. 'A lot of people are in therapy, they're not in insane asylums.' He's also 40. 'Jesus.' He seems vulnerable. SPLASHING AND SHOUTING Unh! I'm awake now! That could happen. What? It'd have to be a super high-end fucking garbage disposal. You can't hold any revelations I had during a shamanic ceremony against me. There. You're judging me. That guy's there. Oh, hey, what's up, man? Hey. Why am I still pissed off? We were 25. We finally got a break, and you had to fuck it up. I didn't like the deal. It was completely standard. It was a record deal, Roger, OK? It was a very big thing for us and we were not going to get any better than that. It was corporate bullshit. I didn't want to be a slave to the A and R department. They'd fuck with the songs. We had no control. You were not the only person in the band, Roger. Do you understand that? It's morally reprehensible what you did. I'm sorry, but I didn't want to do it unless it was on our terms. Well, you got your way, you know. There's no record. There's no band. There's your terms. Awesome. Beller, it was 15 years ago. You're rich. What do you care? You've done all right. It doesn't matter. No, it does matter. You're not the person who I thought you were. What about Ivan? He's fixing computers now. This could have changed his life. Ivan was counting on it. He co-wrote those songs with you, man. Ivan wrote some of the music with me. Stop rationalising. Ivan can take care of himself. I'm surprised he still speaks to you. You know, why am I even here? You're never going to change. HE SIGHS What's that? What's that sigh? Nothing. What are you doing? Asshole. Hey. Go get it. Go get it. DOG PANTS VERY QUICKLY ENGAGED TONE What the fuck? RINGING TONE 'Hello?' Florence, it's Roger Greenberg. 'Hey.' Um... Mahler's... He's breathing weird, and he's suddenly lethargic and... 'Sometimes he gets overheated.' No, I mean, he hasn't moved, period. And I can't get through to fucking Vietnam, and I'm sorry to have to call you. I just... I don't know if you know... How long do we wait? I don't know. They seem kind of busy. Should I go ask? If you want. Do you want to do it? Oh. OK. They know we're here, but... Hi. Do you know how much longer for Mahler? You know, I think we're just waiting for a doctor to get out of the room. OK. She thinks that they're just waiting for a doctor to get out of the room. Yeah, I could hear her. OK. I think it's sciatica. Yeah, he's had that before. But his eyes are jaundiced, so I'd like to run some tests and I will keep him overnight just to make sure everything is OK. And I imagine you can bring him home tomorrow. Thank you. It's OK. 'They gave him an infusion?! 'Is it his white blood cells or his red blood cells?' I'm pretty sure white. 'Well, it makes a difference. Are you taking notes?' I haven't yet, no. 'You have to write this stuff down if you're not going to remember it.' I'm sorry. I'm almost positive it's white. 'Did you ask him about the doghouse?' 'When's he coming home?' He was supposed to come home today, but the numbers dropped and they want to keep him until he's stable. But they asked if the gardeners use rat poison. 'They're not supposed to. Shit! Should we be getting on a plane?' No. No, he'll be OK. I mean, I'll let you know if... 'Fuck. 'Mahler.' 'Has he started the doghouse?' 'I'll call Florence and get the information.' I'm doing it, OK? So you can call me. Cos I pretty much got it. 'Pretty much isn't very comforting to Carol and me.' Yeah, well, he's not my dog, OK? I'm trying to take care of it. Listen, I'm sorry. I... I know when Mum was sick, I know you said I needed to come out, but Mum said I didn't. 'Listen, we've done that. Mum's dead. 'I'm not going to baby you about it. I'm talking about right now. I'm in Vietnam and my dog is sick. 'And you know what? Carol warned me. 'This is so fucking typical of you.' RAIN BATTERS AGAINST WINDOWS 'I'm sorry to get so heated. 'I know you're trying. It's scary being so far away.' Yeah, well, you can trust me, OK? 'I know.' 'How... 'How are you doing? Huh, man?' I'm fine. Fine. 'Good. What's going on? 'Carol wants me to ask about the doghouse, 'if that even matters now.' Can the pool overflow? 'Yes, the pool can fucking overflow! 'What the fuck's going on over there?' It's raining. '"Have a great vacation." '"Thank you. Take care of my house and dog." '"Oh, is he dead? Sorry."' You know what? I asked you a question. '"Can the pool overflow?" Fuck you!' PHONE RINGS 'Hello?' # There's a rugged road on the prairie # Stretchin' all across the last frontier # There a stranger strives solitary # Blessed is the lonesome pioneer # Roll on, roll on, roll on # Night birds are flyin' # Come on, the light is gone # Hope's slowly dyin' # Tell me how you come ridin' through... # Can I get four beers? Are you Roger? Uh-huh. I'm Gina, Florence's friend. Uh-huh. I've heard a lot about you. Do you want to come join our table? No, I think I'll stay here. Maybe later. Isn't she beautiful? She's so ultra-sexy and hot up there. What's that look? You're so quiet. I'm thinking of a letter I'm going to write. I hear you don't drive. Uh-huh. Did you ever drive? Mmm-hmm. I grew up here, I drove then. I moved to New York and I stopped. It was really nice meeting you. # Gainin' steady till this round is won # On the long and lonely road to kingdom come # People far below chasin' pleasures # Offer him directions on the run # Prophets on the path offer treasures # And though he's mighty hungry he takes none # Roll on, roll on, roll on # Night birds are flyin' # Come on, the light is gone # Hope's slowly dyin'... # ROCK MUSIC BLASTS People don't call on my birthday any more. I guess I don't call people on their birthdays, so why should they call me? I didn't call you. When's yours? November. That's right. I'll call you this year. MAN LAUGHS LOUDLY We're taking her to this side. Laughing already demonstrates appreciation, the applause seems superfluous. And also, it's like, just treat the restaurant like it's your living room, guy. I'm weirdly on tonight. Should we order? Maybe I should've invited Florence. Or I should've had a party. Birthdays are hard, man. It's weird ageing, right? It's like, "What the fuck is going on?" I know. Youth is wasted on the young. I'd go further. I'd go, "Life is wasted on "people." Should I invite her? It doesn't have to mean anything. I don't want to set up a series of expectations with her. What do you think? Yeah, if you want. I guess I could call her. OK, then we should wait to order. Maybe it'd be good. Do you care? No, no. It's a different dynamic. Yeah. She lives near here. I'll see if she's around. She probably has other plans. I won't get into it being my birthday. She's young. Thank you. Thank you. Thanks. MAN HOOTS WITH LAUGHTER I don't find a lot of girls in LA attractive. Do you? I do, yeah. I said I don't. Oh, I do. She isn't as pretty as Beth, or her face is, but she's bigger. Not fat. I find it sexy, but you'll see. I never found Beth as beautiful as everyone else did. She was my girlfriend. Years ago. I didn't think you'd take offence. Well, you like racist Portuguese women. She made one remark, and it's a cultural thing. I mean, by our standards, Fabula's mother is a bigot. I know you never liked Fabula. Florence is... If you worked in an office with her, you'd definitely develop a crush on her, but outside the office, you'd start to wonder if she was as cute as you'd imagined. I'm just saying, you know, Fabula is a lot less possessive than she used to be. You'd like her more now. Can I get another Scotch? That's the bus boy. Fine, can I get another fork? This one has some food on it. Fabula never got you. She thought she'd bagged some fancy British guy rather than just Ivan. I know she helped you with the addiction and everything, but you're over that now. We have to find you someone. It's too bad neither of us are the type to go whoring. Is that her? Hi. Hi. This is Ivan. Hello. It's nice to meet you. Hi. Hello. Hi. Sorry. Sorry. I'll be right back. 'Hello?' Beth. 'What?' Beth? 'Who?' Is this a child? 'Yes.' Is your mom there? 'Who is this?' Roger. 'Miller?' Roger. 'Mom, it's Miller!' 'Hello?' Beth. 'Who's this?' Roger. 'Oh, hi.' What are you doing? 'I'm sewing Charles' pants.' Uh-huh. Is Charles your son? 'Yeah. Hot stuff.' Are you sewing his Flash suit? Is he the devil or the Flash? Did he say? 'Yeah.' How's the rest of your week looking? What'd you do with her? She's in the bathroom. You see what I mean about working in an office? Where'd you go? I called Beth. Really? Come on, I mean, Beth is a part of my life. She's... I don't believe that things happen for a reason, but maybe me being out here at this particular time... ..it's happening for a reason. I cannot believe you still have this. Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait. And I got you this. Wow. "The Magic Marker. Live!" Man, look at Beller. How is Lenny? Lenny not so good. You've got a bit of a mullet going on there. No, I think that's a shadow. You're trying so hard to look casual. # Happy birthday to you... # No, don't have them do that. Don't. # Happy birthday to you... # Don't. You're such a fucking asshole. Roger, relax. You know I hate this shit. Will you stop? No... # Roger... # OK? Sit on my dick, asshole! And many more. What the fuck, right? Well, he just got out of a mental hospital. Right. What? Really? I mean, who does that? Gets the waiters. I'm not one of these preening LA people who likes everything to be about them. I'm not some dickhead who does karaoke at the Farmers Market and hosts a running charades game every Friday night, and swing dances. What? You told Ivan to sit on your dick. Did I? Yeah. OK. Now, happy birthday. Great. So, I got the witch. Thanks. I made a snap judgment. If you'd rather the devil, you can switch it out. No, I'm happy with the witch. You're right, these are too old for your niece. I'm impressed by you. In what way? I don't know. I mean, you seem really fine doing nothing. It's like you don't feel all that bullshit pressure to be successful. I mean, by other people's standards. I'm... You know, I almost had a record deal when I got out of college. I haven't done nothing. Cool. I want to be doing nothing. I'm doing nothing deliberately. That's what I'm saying. I don't know that I could do nothing and be that cool with everything. Well, there's so much crap out there. Mahler's not at home. You could stay over. Wink-wink. Um... I'm not supposed to... I try not to... But, fuck it. Yeah, OK. Ivan's nice. Is he your best friend? Yeah, I guess so. I lost Ivan there for a few years to this racist he met in rehab. But their marriage is ending, which is good for him, and me, to be honest. Good. You probably wouldn't believe this, but in college we all looked up to him. He was from England and he used to be really handsome and stylish and kind of great. I can believe that. Ivan and I call each other "man," but it's meant as a joke. It's the kind of thing we wouldn't say, cos... It's our imitation of other people. I know what that's like. This friend of mine, Marnie, and me, we went... We went to this cheesy bar in Hollywood... and we just thought, "Let's pretend to be these slutty girls "who are looking to get picked up, "even though we're not." And we end up talking to these two frat guys, but, like, 30. And they were all into their bodies and cologned, very well-groomed. And we ended up going back to one of their places. And I think one of them was, like, almost retarded, or else he was really drunk, because he didn't make any sense. And they got out this video camera and Marnie and I, we did this kind of striptease. And it was crazy because we were still playing these girls, but there we were, showing our breasts... And then, we ran out of there pretty fast. We were total freaks. You never have anything good to drink. You know, that's like the stupidest story I've ever heard. It's just... Bye! What? What is the point of that story? DOOR SLAMS 'Lots of really great, interesting people 'have tried to kill themselves.' 'He tried to kill himself?' 'I don't think so. I'm just saying.' Come on, he's an asshole. That's a defence. He's not like us. He's... You can tell that a lot of normal stuff is really hard for him. Like being nice? I like him. Should I call him? No! I don't like how he treats you. He acts like you work for him. Well, I work for his brother. I don't want to be rude. If you keep driving him places, I'll stop speaking to you. OK. We think it's an autoimmune disorder. Uh-huh. This hospital, it has more experience with internal medicine. I called, and they're expecting you. You can't do it here? I mean, you know him now. I know, but he needs to get well. Thank you. Come on, Mahler. I know the doctors there. You'll be in good hands. This is where we're going. I got to pick Victor up from school in half an hour. Can you ask Florence? I'm trying not to call her. I'm just going to hurt her feelings, man. I'm trying not to do that to people any more. And I don't want to be asking anyone for a ride any more, ever. I just turned 41, I should be able to drive. Why are you yelling at me? What a pain in the ass. Come on, come on. 'Survival rate is about 50-50,' but hopefully with the right cocktail of drugs, we'll be able to get it under control and keep him stable. 'Dear Hollywood Pet Taxi, 'you would think a vehicle made expressly 'for the transportation of animals 'would have a soft floor. 'You were given very high marks in the Yellow Pages. 'My next letter, by the way. 'The fact that the animals you transport 'have no way of lodging a formal complaint, 'except for a well-deserved bite of the hand of the abuser, 'should make you that much more caring. 'The sick ones, like Mahler, can only look pityingly into your eyes 'while you ignore their pleas. 'I intend to copy the ASPCA. 'Sincerely, Roger Greenberg.' I always felt bad about that night after we played the Viper Room, and you were there with your sister, and I wanted to go to that party and you were tired and I let you go home. What night was that? You were with your sister. Yeah, I don't... I don't remember that night. I should've been straight with you cos I originally got into music to meet girls, and I think when we were playing around LA and I was starting to get attention... From girls, yeah. No, I understand. Yeah, but I wasn't clear with you and I want to apologise for how I behaved, cos I kind of just let it end, and left town and was uncommunicative. Yeah. And I didn't even give you a reason... Yeah, but...I knew. Well, I'm sorry. It's OK. Like I said, I don't even remember that night. You had bought a new mattress that afternoon. Sounds plausible. I mean, what was it, like, 15 years ago or something? Yeah, you didn't like the Sealy, you thought it was too mushy. We used to make that 1-800-Mattress joke, "The extra 'S' for extra sex." OK. OK. We could've gotten married and had kids. Yeah? Do you think? I don't think we would've. Really. I don't know, it was a big relationship for me. So you're a carpenter now? Yeah. I was always good at making things, so... Oh, yeah? Beth, I made you that bed. Don't you remember? It was why we were going to buy the mattress to begin with. Yes, I do. I do. I do remember that. I'm sorry. Totally. Go on. I work out of a studio in Bushwick that I share with a few other carpenters and that's... been pretty good. It's political, though. Um... What else? Recently, I had this thing where I couldn't move my legs, literally. You know, but it was psychological. God! Yeah, so that took some time dealing with. I think that brings us up-to-date. Are you OK? Yeah. I just... I think I need to just let go, you know? I had a shrink there who said, "You only miss by 5%." I'm not positive what it means, but in most things, 95 is pretty good. I had a shrink once who told me... .."You're of value." It's stupid, but it always stayed with me. You look really pretty. Thanks. My dog is sick. Oh, yeah? My... My mom is sick. Phillip's dog, really, but I'm taking care of him. He has an autoimmune disorder. Since he got sick, I keep thinking I have something. I'm sorry about your mom. Yeah. I'm glad you're feeling better. I get horrible anxiety sometimes, still. Yeah, that I remember. Do you want to have dinner one night? This week? Or next. I kind of meant... ..like, on a date. Oh. No. I mean, you know, that's just a terrible idea. No. I mean, you know, no. Hello. Shit, they just... They don't even... She doesn't seem to... She looks harried even though no-one's here. I'm just going to go get her. I'm sure she'll be by. PHONE RINGS TV: 'What is going on? 'Water. Water.' PHONE RINGS 'Oh, God.' Hello. How is Lenny? Lenny not so good. THEY CHUCKLE 'Not too late to call, I hope.' No. Watching Just My Luck with Lindsay Lohan on Starz. Mmm. How is it? 'Kind of funny.' She's got charm. 'All right.' So, I was thinking... ..we should maybe do something together again. 'Write some songs.' Aren't you going back to New York? 'Yeah, but...' If we got something going I could stay here, possibly. 'I don't know if I've really got time, you know, with the computer work and Victor.' Isn't it funny, don't you still think of yourself as a guitar player even though you don't do it any more? No. No. No, I don't. You know, I've just hired this guy called Ezra to help with the company, so... 'It's just, you know, I've got to concentrate on that.' OK. I think I'm having a party tomorrow. 'Tomorrow?' A pool party. So come. Bring Victor. 'Pool party? Cool.' After we hang up, I'm going to call some people. OK, man. Listen, I'll see you tomorrow. All right. Bye. MAN: Do you want to see Bigfoot walk? Very famous footage of him doing this. He doesn't wear no shoes. Bigfoot! And there's lots of scientific evidence, my friend. Megan's husband wants to know, do you know what kind of tree that skinny one with yellow flowers is? No. I mean, I wouldn't even think to know something like that. Are you coming out? Victor wants to show you his dive. Is it OK? Is it a dud? I do this, I throw a party last minute, then I'm disappointed that no-one can come. It's fine. We're having fun. I need to put together the chips and guac and Creamsicles I bought. I got you iced tea and lemonade, but I didn't know the proportions, so you'll have to make it. I see. Thanks. I guess I'll make an appearance. Are you pulling a Gatsby and watching the party from afar? I don't know that I need to document the reasons how this isn't like a Gatsby. Marlon and Peggy are really nice. I didn't even invite them, they just come here. It turns out they've got a son who went to the same school as Victor. It's such a small world. Why is that news to you? It IS a small world. I'm surprised we all don't run into each other more often. You and I went to school together. LAUGHTER AND CHATTER PHONE RINGS Hey. Hey, Rog. PHONE RINGS 'Hi, this is Florence. 'I'm sorry to be calling, but I wanted to check and see how...' Hello? 'Oh, I wanted to check and see how Mahler is.' We had to move him to another vet. 'Really? Oh.' Yeah, they do better with internal medicine there. I was going to call you, but... 'Is he OK? What did they say? I thought it was sciatica.' VACUUM CLEANER DRONES Can you...? Please? Please! 'I'd like to see him at the hospital, 'if you can give me the information.' 'We don't have to see each other. We can go at different times.' I like the old vet better. Gina told me it's nice to leave them something that smells like you. Sometimes I think he's a human in a dog costume. Wait... THEY GRUNT I don't know any of this. I don't know Karen Dalton. Very cool. Thanks. You sure you don't know it? No. No. Thanks. Thank you. You can tell me if you know it. I don't. Karen Dalton was, like, this homeless junkie in the '70s. You know, it's a woman with sandals. Maybe there's something you can sing on there. You like old things. A shrink said to me once, I have trouble living in the present, so I linger on the past because I felt like I never really lived it in the first place, you know? Do you think you could love me? I... I don't know, Florence. I just get excited to see you, and then... ..I think I get worried it's going to go too fast, so I say things to get a reaction. What? We got to stop this. Really? Yeah. You got to stop calling me. I've intentionally not called you. Even when I needed to call you, I didn't. You know, I took a pet taxi. I haven't called you. You called me today. That was for Mahler. Come on, it wasn't for Mahler. Florence, take some responsibility. Don't put yourself in this kind of situation. What situation? I like seeing you. No, you don't. You don't like it. Why are we even having this conversation? We're not really even dating, and we're seeing other people. I'm not seeing anyone. Neither am I, but I want to. Who? I don't know! Anyone. I'm doing nothing. I'm not tied to anyone. How many times do we have to go over it? Jesus, I... I should be with a divorced 38-year-old who has teenage kids and low expectations about life. I don't want to fucking do this any more. God! Half a pill three times a day with food. The blood thinners, just at night. They're for the blood clots. And he'll get prednisone, which is a steroid, twice a day for three days, and then we'll bring him down to one-and-a-half a day and the blood thinners every other day. OK? Hi, little Mahler baby. Tried Ivan, but he had a birthday party. I didn't want to cram him into a shitty pet taxi. Hi, baby. Thank you for doing this. I'm here for Mahler. Gina says I'm crazy to drive you anywhere. Right. Your credit card. $3,084? # You make me... # You don't have a girlfriend. You don't need a lot of calls or text. You need data ` for dating sites, like Honey Badger. (LAUGHS) You do have a girlfriend. You need less data and more calls ` lovey-dovey calls. # You make me... # You don't have a girlfriend again. She won't return your calls. You need more text. Things change. Now your Prepay can too. Get more of what you need and less of what you don't with Vodafone My Flex Prepay. He seems better. Give me his pills and I'll mark them for you, so you don't forget. PHONE RINGS ANSWER MACHINE: 'Hi, you've reached the Greenbergs, please leave a message.' If you put the pills in peanut butter, they go down easier. 'Roger, it's Phillip. Pick up. Pick up! 'Fuck it. I got a very weird message from Florence. She's thinking of quitting. 'What the fuck's going on? Did you do something that freaked her out? 'Do you know how hard it is to find an assistant I actually like? 'Jesus! I can't trust you with anyone.' 'How is Mahler?' 'How is Mahler, by the way? 'Did you pick him up today? Call me.' Are you cooking? You want to make Jell-o? The vet said that the steroids might upset his stomach. I'll just... I'll cook this and then I'll go. Going to make chicken, too? I can pick up a roast chicken at the market. He shouldn't have the skin, it's too rich. I can eat the skin. You want to have chicken and rice with Mahler? You can walk to Ralph's, it's three blocks from here. OK, will you be here when I get back? Oh, my God. I'll go get the chicken, but I'm going to call you when I'm pulling up and I want you to come out and I want you to get it from me. HORN BLARES Thank you. Listen, I'm sorry about my freak-out the other night. You know? I gotta try to not do that. I get abusive and I'm working on that. So, anyway, I apologise. Thank you. I mean, it's not just me. You do participate in it, too, though. I mean, don't you think? No, then you're not apologising, you know. I'm... This isn't a good day for me. I'm going to go. I'm apologising for my side of it. That's not an apology. Well, apologising is hard. No, it's not. Not for me. Well, it is for me. You know what, Florence? You know what I think? I think you're transferring shit onto me. I think you're looking to me for the mental and physical abuse of your father, and sexual molestation, or whatever. I was not molested. Or whatever. He was withholding. I'm right about that, right? I was not molested! I said "whatever." 'You have reached the voicemail of...' 'Gina.' Gina, call me back when you get this, OK? Also, we have to be there at 7:00 in the morning, so you should pick me up at 6:30. SINGS ALONG TO MUSIC: # Hands across the water # Heads across the sky # Admiral Halsey notified me # He had to have a berth or he couldn't get to sea... # PHONE RINGS Hey. Hey. SHE SIGHS I thought you were Gina. 'No, it's me.' Roger. This one's for me. What? I was talking to Mahler. Why are you calling me? 'I wanted to speak to you.' You need some more granola? Or ice cream sandwiches? SHE LAUGHS Come on. 'I mean, are we seeing each other or not?' Well, that's what I want to talk about. I don't know, I mean, I'm leaving in, like, a week. Hurt people hurt people. "Hurt people, hurt people"? Hurt people, hurt people. It's something a singing coach of mine told me. Shit! 'Sorry.' Is somebody there? No. 'I just spilled my Champagne. Forget it.' You never fucked that guy who plays guitar with you? 'No!' I don't want this to sound dramatic, and I wasn't going to say anything, and Gina's taking me. I mean, it's not yours. It's... I found out a couple of days ago. I don't know, it's gotta be my ex's, because I'm six or seven weeks, and you and I have only just... 'And you used a condom.' SHE LAUGHS I didn't want to tell you. I mean, it's weird. I've been pregnant this whole time. Uh-huh. I made an appointment for a D&C. I'm really sensitive to pain, so I asked for anaesthesia. 'Sorry, I'm trying to get drunk now. I can't eat after 10:00.' I'll take you to it. How's that going to work? Am I going to drive you to take me? LOUD ROCK 'N' ROLL PLAYING Can you turn it down? I'm sorry. My head is killing me. No, it's fine. Don't worry. It's your day, or... You know what I mean. We'll be here when you get out. OK. Thanks. Don't be nervous. I just don't know what I'm doing with my life. You're of value. I know that. You don't have to say that. We could get her some flowers. I thought since she couldn't eat, she might be hungry when it's over. Here. Well, when you're ready. Thanks. Could we go? They apparently won't let us go until you pee. Oh. I don't have to. Maybe when you get to the bathroom, you'll feel like it. I need to lie here for a little longer. But you'll probably be more comfortable lying at home. Let her sleep, man. You like me so much more than you think you do. OK. Wish it wasn't too late to get my medical degree. It's not too late. I'd be over 50 by the time I graduated. What is it? Four years, right? Yeah, but I know myself. I'd procrastinate, take time off. Eight years at best. Who's going to hire a 49... Let's just call it 50. A 50-year-old vet? I'm confused. Are you going to vet school or regular medical school? Neither, clearly. I have to get back for Mahler's pills. It's a stupid rule. What does peeing have to do with anything? Fabula makes this rice dish with pineapples and raisins. It's really delicious. I think you'll find lots of girls who'll be able to make that dish. No, no, no. This is a Brazilian speciality. OK. She's sleeping and she wants to stay the night. Did she pee? You want to come in, watch a video? No, I should get going. Where? I think I'll go back to the motel, take a nap. Didn't sleep too well last night. I'm leaving in, like, a week. We'll hang out some more, don't worry. You're sure it's OK I left? She might wake up and be scared. She'll be fine. The nurse seemed nice. I had to get back for Mahler. I understand. I'm not explaining myself to you. You're just saying, right? Come on, one drink. No, I really gotta go. OK. I, um...appreciate your friendship. Can I ask, what do people say about me? Like, negative things I wouldn't know. Let me go, man. Come on, I'm sure people must trash me when I'm not around. They don't trash you. OK, what criticisms do they have? I don't know. I'd say the biggest criticism they have is that you have trouble making fun of yourself. Really? That's incredible. I'm the funniest person I know. Well, not about yourself. Really? That's what people say. I wouldn't get too worried about it. These things aren't difficult to fix. Right. People say they think you lie about things you don't need to lie about, that you don't make any effort, that you're a bit of a prince. Who says? Who are these people? That's just totally insane. I'm just telling you what I've heard. If anything I'd say I'm too honest, don't you think? Yeah. I mean, I'm pretty upfront with... No effort? Mmm. I'm making my brother's family a doghouse. You know, I brought my tool kit from New York. They had to check my bag because of that. I always do carry-on. I have calluses. Does Beller say this? I think Beller said it, yeah. And others, too. Johno, maybe once, and Anna. That's funny. Yeah. Completely wrong, but funny. WOMAN LAUGHS WOMAN: What do you want? LAUGHTER Hello? Sara? There's the strange man who's been sleeping in my room. Oh, this is Muriel. Hey. I heard you killed our dog. No. No, no, he's all better. We brought him back yesterday. Well, where is he? Mahler! Mahler? Mahler! We leave for Australia tomorrow morning. Isn't that like a 20-hour flight? No, it's 14. So that's, like, seven movies. Yeah. 'Hello?' Party of 20-year-olds has suddenly happened at my house. 'Hey, man.' Hey, man. How was your nap? 'Yeah, it was fine.' Where are you? 'I'm having dinner with my family.' Your parents? 'No. 'My other family.' Fabula. 'Mm-hm.' Do you want me to come over there? 'No! It's OK.' Just don't do anything. 'I'm not sure I know what you mean.' You should come here after. 'I really got to go.' OK. Call you later. Hey! He just got out of the hospital. I'm sorry. You know, don't give him beer. I'm so sorry. He's got an autoimmune disorder, all right? Mahler. I didn't know. Mahler. THUMPING MUSIC AND LAUGHTER Mahler. Hey, man, you got a cool place. Oh, thanks. It's not totally mine, but... Yeah, what do you do? Oh, I'm kind of doing nothing for a while. Is that coke? Yup. I'd heard coke was in again. Yeah, you want some? Um... I'm Rich. Roger Greenberg. Is it OK to mix coke and Zoloft? Yeah, totally. I haven't done this in, like, 15 years. Since college, or since a couple of years out. It's very unlike me. Mm. HE SNORTS I actually hate coke. I hate it politically and I hate how it makes me feel. But when it's done, I may have to kill one of you out of sheer frustration. I'm going to change the record. We need better coke music. Oh, yeah. Put on some Korn. I got the perfect thing. 'Hello?' Hey, man. 'Hey, man.' I just did a line. I think the last time I did coke was with you. It was just a line, but I feel really wired. I guess my tolerance is less. 'OK.' Hey, you done with dinner? 'No, we're still eating.' WOMAN: Put on AC/DC! You sure you don't want me there? 'Yeah. I've gotta go, man.' I almost feel like I can get in a car and drive. 'Don't do that.' You gotta come here when you're done. Oh, dude! Come on! Fuck off, Jerry! 'Tonight's not good, man.' Man, you gotta come! I can't believe you lied to me about your dinner. Put on AC/DC! It's actually a pretty fun party. 'Man, I can't!' All right. I got to go. We want to hear AC/DC! Don't, OK? Come on! Duran Duran's great coke music. Give it a chance. Let's maybe not keep saying "coke" in every sentence. I read an article. Aren't you guys all just fucking on the internet? Not all of us. But some? I guess some. Yeah, I think Paige has a site, but it's more art than porn. They shot a skin flick on my campus, a couple guys and some townies, and they acted in it. Sick. Hey, can't we put on some Korn? No, we can't put on fucking Korn. Jesus! You guys smoke crack at all? I don't. I have, once or twice. I might get back into drugs. I've got a Vicodin, if you want. I could use that, actually. You want a neck massage? Uh... OK. Normally, I'd say no because I'm a little OCD, but... OK. That's great. Are you kids really different from me? I mean, do the movies, and the iPods, and the facility with MySpace pages make you guys really different? I don't know. Every article I read seems to be saying that. Definitely feel it. Good coke. What? Nothing. You're funny. You're mean. The thing about you kids is you're all kind of insensitive. I'm glad I grew up when I did, cos your parents were too perfect at parenting. All that Baby Mozart and Dan Zanes songs. You're so sincere and interested in things. There's a confidence in you guys that's horrifying. You're all ADD and carpal tunnel. You wouldn't know agoraphobia if it bit you in the ass, and it makes you mean. You say things to someone like me, who's older and smarter, with this blithe air. I'm freaked out by you kids. I hope I die before I end up meeting one of you in a job interview. THEY TITTER Fuck or fight? What? Fuck or fight? What are you fighting against? What do you got? Uh...I don't have much. Ah-ha! Then that's what I'm fighting against, not much. Boom! THUMPING MUSIC What the fuck? Rich, you asshole. I didn't do anything, man. Oh. Sorry. Hey, get off the stereo. I was listening to that. Where's the Duran Duran? "Where's the Duran Duran?" Hey, careful, those are my brother's records. "Those are my brother's records." Fuck off. Agh! Jesus! There's something in the pool! Hey, don't feed him. No, don't feed him! Mahler, drop it! Mahler, drop it. Mahler, drop it. Drop it. Drop it. Ow! God, what is it? I think it's a bird or an opossum, or something. It's a... I think we've had one of these before. Aaagh! Holy shit! All right. It's coming to get your ass! I'm sorry your dog has AIDS. He doesn't have AIDS. It's an autoimmune disorder. SCREAMS: How is Lenny?! Hey, man. Hey, you OK, man? Is that pot? Where did you get that? You want a puff? No, man, I quit. You know that. OK, man. OK. Isn't this weird? So, how'd it go? Fine. And? I think...we're going to have another try. You're shitting me. Please don't make this hard for me. Oh, God, man. Don't give in. I know it's the harder, more painful decision to stay free, but that's what adulthood is. I could just stay with Florence because it's easy, but I don't want easy. You've been dating Florence for a month. I've been married for ten years with a child. Don't tell me about adulthood. We're not dating, exactly. That's my point! Hey, you're shouting at me. It's been a really hard time for me, Roger. I mean, I miss my family. I feel like...all the hard work I've done over the years, kicking the drugs, being a dad, I feel like it's all slipping away from me. It's not going away. It's transforming. You're going through something, which means... I don't think you understand what it's been like for me out here, how the life I'd hoped for... It's huge to finally embrace the life you never planned on. I wanted to make that record. We never would've survived at a major label with those restrictions. How the fuck do you know? Because that's not how the world works. What could you possibly know about how the world works? Listen, I think you're playing out some old family dynamic here... Apropos of what we were saying before about what people say about us? People feel you hold on to petty resentments. You asked me what people say about you. I don't want to know. Yeah, well, you should know. People think you play the victim. And I don't mean this in a bad way, but you let people feel sorry for you when you're really just protecting your own narcissism. I don't want to know! Well, that's why I didn't want to be in a fucking band with you! Because you won't acknowledge your own shit. And you were fucked up all the time! What do you want me to say, huh? What do you want me to say? I had no idea that would be our only offer. I didn't think that I had the power to blow it. I thought that we were all just giving our two cents. Fuck, I didn't know I was going to be the one to make the band fall apart. You know, maybe, obviously, I would do it differently now! Of course I know what it's like to live a life I didn't plan on. What the fuck do you think I'm doing right now? Florence told me you were in the hospital. I'd know, I understand about those things. You know, we could've talked about it, maybe made each other feel better, but instead we never talk about anything good. This is a small thing, and it's probably boring for you, but it would've been nice if you'd have made an effort to know Vic. Who's Vic? My son. Oh, Victor. I didn't recognise the diminutive. You don't have a girlfriend. You don't need a lot of calls or text. You need data ` for dating sites, like Honey Badger. (LAUGHS) You do have a girlfriend. You need less data and more calls ` lovey-dovey calls. # You make me... # You don't have a girlfriend again. She won't return your calls. You need more text. Things change. Now your Prepay can too. Get more of what you need and less of what you don't with Vodafone My Flex Prepay. 'Hi, it's Florence. Leave a message.' Florence. Florence, I'm calling to say I'm sorry you had to go through what you're going through. And Mahler's fine. He ate pizza. I'm leaving this in your voicemail, but it's really a letter. I get so angry about the world, you know? If I knew who to write a letter to about all the stupidity in the world, I'd do it. You're 25. I was just 27. You're brave. Young people are brave. When I was a kid, I was a leader and most of the kids always looked up to me. I thought I might go into space, you know, as an astronaut. I can't even swim in the fucking pool. My brother's in Vietnam. We have the same parents. I can't blame that. I really love Phillip, but I'm not supposed to be on his bed. I love my parents. I love Mahler. I miss my mom. I really... like you. I just hate how embarrassing it all is. I don't understand. What happened to me? Where does experience go? Remember Charlie Sheen standing on his balcony in Wall Street? Did you see that movie? Saying, "Who am I?" Phillip and I used to make so much fun of it. I'm thinking, now, it wasn't so stupid. Somebody once said to me, "Hurt people hurt people." It's kind of trite, but it stayed with me. Oh, man! That was you, like, a few days ago. I used to have a really good memory, too. Anyway, we do... I do hurt people. Hurt people. I think Ivan and I broke up. Florence... I really like you. Love, Roger. Assholes. WOMAN LAUGHS Dicks. I don't understand why she did it. Good morning, sunshine. Holy shit! How you feeling, Sunny? What's "Sunny"? We decided that's our name for you. I think I'm still drunk. Hey, they printed my letter about Pakistan. Cool! "Roger Greenberg. Hollywood, California." I mean, I've got no problem giving some guy a blowjob, but she has taken it to the extreme. Why do guys like to do that? Come on you and spread it? They don't all like it. They do. No, they don't. You just like guys who do that. Fuck you! You're really good with him. You have dogs? No, Florence showed me how to do it. Did you start an affair with Phillip's assistant? No. I'm jealous. You should come to Australia with us. Yeah? There's a great Kinks song called Australia. Totally. You should totally come. Maybe I will. OK. But you better hurry. We gotta leave in, like, five minutes. Fuck! What are we going to do about Mahler? Oh, fuck. Can I ask you guys a favour? Yeah. What's happening? How you doing? I'm Roger, by the way. Marlon and Peggy. Sorry it's such a mess. Yeah, we're going to go home. Can you take Mahler until Wednesday? Uh... Yeah, sure. We love Mahler. Come here, baby. Great. No, wait a second. You know, run it by his nose. OK. No sweat. Thanks, man. And he takes prednisone, which is a steroid, twice a day for the next three days. I'll write this out. Also, there's an antibiotic and a blood thinner, but I'll write it down for you. Let's go! We still have to get you a ticket. Come on! It's fucking peaceful, is what it is. I love it. Did you see sharks last time? Oh, fuck! OK. You know what really pisses me off, is fucking Lily. Once again. I still can't get over that. What a slut. Like, I'm thinking about it now, and it's so much worse than I remembered. Now that I feel, like, maybe I was drunk at the time. I've seen a great white, and there are the most amazing wrecks. I literally cannot wait. I love that you're doing this. Is this completely crazy? No! I mean, it's what people do, right? You'll love Australia. For some people, this is nothing. And who knows how much longer the Reef's going to be around? There's this starfish that's killing the marine life. Roger, are you certified? To what? Dive. No, I don't really swim. THEY LAUGH You can go look at whales while we dive. Sunny will look at whales. OK, you know what? You can cut out the Sunny business. Oh, my God, look at this guy in these overalls and the clogs. I left my ChapStick. Oh, my God. Are overalls back in now, or is he crazy? No, I saw a bunch of people in overalls... Hey, will you check this out? What the fuck is that? That is so weird. I know, right? It's so itchy. Don't touch it. You know what? I'm supposed to get someone from the hospital. No, no, no. Hold it. Hey! Hey, hold it! Can you open my door? No, you're our prisoner. Exactly. Come on, open the fucking door, please. OK, fine. Come on. Roger, it's a rental. Open it. Would you stop? Sara, open the fucking door! I'm trying. Stop pulling on it! You know, I can't go, I can't afford it, and I have to pick up my friend. Have a good time, all right? Bye! I've got to get insurance. The anaesthesia's so expensive. I'm such a baby about pain. And I stayed overnight. I'm glad your brother's coming back next week. I need to work more hours. Thanks. I really picked my lip in my sleep, which was possibly about finding a pet in the Canyons. Do you, uh... ..get The New York Times? No. It's good to get the paper. I'll pick you up one. OK. Did you get my message? I haven't checked yet. What did you say? Um... I reassessed the movie Wall Street, among other things. I don't know it. I wasn't going to give it to you cos I was pissed, but you can open it. Happy birthday, again. Thanks. Now you have the set. Not that they're a set. What about your niece? Remember, the sticks are too old. She's coming over this weekend. I framed her picture. Do you have a tape-measure? I think there's a ruler in the desk drawer. Do you have a hammer? Maybe in there. Here? You want it on this wall, here? OK. Cool. Like a professional. Well, I am a professional. I mean, I build things. I know you know I was in a hospital. I'm not hiding it. But it's not what defines me, you know? I understand. I want to listen to my message. I'd... I'd had some to drink. Gina. My mom. OK. This is you. www.able.co.nz Captions were made possible with funding from NZ On Air. Able 2016