MYSTERIOUS MUSIC HAPPY MUSIC It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! (Groans) (Groans) It's today! It's today! It's today! It's always today, George. I mean, this is the day. That's right. Can't I come? You have to go to school, George. Will he be here when I get home? I think so. I'm gonna play ball with him, I'm gonna wrestle with him and I'm gonna teach him how to spit. It's gonna be such fun. For all of us. How will you pick the right one? How will you pick the right one? Uh... I don't know. We'll... You'll just know. You'll just know. Yeah. Bye, sweetie. IDYLLIC MUSIC Remember, I want a little brother, not a big brother. WOMAN: We've been through your paperwork, and everything seems to be in order. Adoption isn't for everyone, but you seem like people with plenty of love to share. So... how are you feeling? Goodness, we're... Tingling. With anticipation. BELL RINGS Oh! Recess! Time for you to meet them. Feel free to walk around. They're quite used to having strangers here. Thank you. Thank you. Ah! Lovely people. IDYLLIC MUSIC, CHILDREN PLAY TENSE MUSIC BOY: Nice move, Red. TENSION-RELIEVING MUSIC Oh, Frederick. Look at them. How could we possibly... Choose? I know. They all seem so... Wonderful. SMALL VOICE: You know what's wonderful? What's wonderful is how you both know what the other one is going to say before you even say it. (Laughs) Not that it's any of my business. Yes, well, that happens, when you've been together as long as we have. From being a family. From being a family. A family. Wow. Well, for family, you've certainly come to the right place. I think we can find just what you're looking for. You know, if you want a girl, Susan can read French. And Edith over there can tap-dance while blowing bubbles. Or... maybe you wanted a boy. Actually, I think we were leaning towards a boy. Well, in that case, Benny can do handstands. And Andy can run 100yds faster than you can say, 'Ready, set, go!' You certainly know a lot about everyone, don't you? Well, that's what happens when you've been here as long as I have. I mean, let's face it. Not everyone wants to adopt someone like me. You shouldn't worry about choosing. It happens the same way every time. First, you won't know what to do, you'll be a little bit scared. Then you'll meet one of them. Talk to them. Somehow, you just know. Argh! Are you quite certain you're prepared to handle his... uniqueness? Oh my, yes, yes ` his uniqueness is a perfect fit for the Little family. Perfect. Mr and Mrs Little, we try to discourage couples from adopting children outside their own... species. It rarely works out. Well, it will in this case. # I have a dream that everywhere I go # most everyone captures my eye. # And they find me so fascinating, # indicating quite a keen interest in # a very special guy... CHILDREN CHEER # I'm walking tall, flying high. And in the glow of light of day, # it's not so easy for me to say # oh, I'm so lonely... # STUART: So, what do I call you? Mom. And Dad. And the best news of all is you have a brother... Named George. A brother! What do I call him? George. # I'm feeling relatively blue. # Oh, I'd love a next of kin or two. # There has to be a place for me # where I belong right now. # Don't need a dynasty, # a name to share, a heart to care. # That's really all, and then I'd be # walking tall. # A name to share, a heart to care, # and then I'd be # walking tall. # FREDERICK: Well, Stuart, here we are ` the family home. ELEANOR: They say Littles everywhere can find this house. Even if they've never been here before. Even if they've never been here before. It's just something inside them. Something inside. So, would you like a tour? So, would you like a tour? I don't have any money. That's Uncle Crenshaw, cousin Edgar, Grandpa Spencer. That's Aunt Beatrice. And that's George, your brother. Look, he's already happy to see me! Well, that's just about everybody, except for... (Meows loudly) (Meows loudly) (Both cry out in surprise) Snowbell! Drop him right now! You spit Stuart out this instant, Snowbell. Spit him out! Argh! Oh! Stuart, are you all right? Wait! I'm fine. I'm fine. You must never harm Stuart. Do you understand? Never. Or out you'll go, Mr Snow! Stuart is one of the family. We do not eat family members. GEORGE: Mom, Dad, I'm home! HAPPY MUSIC Is he here? Is my brother here? He certainly is. Where is he? He's here. Stuart, this is George. George, this is Stuart, your new brother. No, really. Really, George. This is your new brother. You look somewhat like a mouse. Yeah, well, I AM somewhat like a mouse. I see. I have to go. Is it just me, or did he seem a little disappointed? Well, he's always a little tired after school. Perks up around dinnertime. Mmm. Mmm. The meatloaf is delicious, dear. Cajun. Shall we get to know each other a little? George? Don't you have anything you want to ask Stuart? Sure, George. Go ahead. I'm an open book. Ask me anything ` the first thing that pops into your head. Could you pass the gravy? Hmm. Your new bedroom, Stuart. We hope you like it. It sure is roomy. Goodnight, Mom! Goodnight, Dad. Goodnight, son. Goodnight, sweetie. (Sighs) (Chuckles contentedly) DOOR CREAKS FLOORBOARDS CREAK TENSE MUSIC Nice kitty. Nice kitty. Pretty kitty! Are you cosy? Yes, thanks. I'm quite comfortable. 'Cause I sleep on a rag in the corner, rat! You seem tense. Tense?! Oh, I'm way past tense. Well, maybe I can help. What do you like? Can I scratch your ears? I could rub your tummy! How'd you like rubbing it from the inside, mouse-boy? Sorry, I'm confused. I thought that's what you do with a pet. A pet?! I'm not your pet! I'm a cat, you're a mouse. You should be living in a hole. This is MY family. Can't we share them? Read my furry pink lips... No! I can't believe this - I'm arguing with lunch. And stay away from the windows. If the other cats find out about this, I'm ruined. Ohh, I gotta relax. Where's my tinkle ball? IDYLLIC MUSIC ELEANOR: George? Time to get up. OK, Mom! Stuart? You too. OK, Mom! (Yawns) (George turns on taps) HUMOROUS MUSIC (Spits) (Spits) (Gargles and spits) (Gargles and spits) Uh-huh! George, I'm trying to get the laundry started! OK! Hey! In the laundry chute, please! OK! DOOR CREAKS Argh! Thank you. (Muffled) Help! Argh! WASHING MACHINE HUMS TO LIFE Oh, dear. Mom! Hello, Mom? It's Stuart! I'm in the washing machine! Mom! Hello? Mom! (Taps glass) Where are you going? Hmm! That's odd. What is? I thought someone was at the door. You look beautiful, dear. Honey, should we talk to George before you go? About what? About Stuart. He hasn't exactly embraced the situation. Snowbell, thank goodness you're here! Can you believe this? I'm locked in the washer. Can you help me? Can you turn this thing off? Why would I turn it off? It's my favourite show. Aha! Oh, that's funny. That's funny. Snowbell! Snowbell, you can't leave me! Talk to the butt. Snowbell, where are you going? I've got to stare at traffic, yawn, lick myself - and believe me, that could take hours if you do it right. Ciao! Are you sure that Stuart is happy here? He's having the time of his life. Help! Somebody, please help me! Hi, Stuart. DRAMATIC MUSIC Help! Stuart! (Coughs and splutters) Just hold on. Where are you? Stuart! Stuart! Stuart! Are you all right? I'm OK, Mom. I'm... (Burps) Ah! (Stuart coughs) (Sneezes and sniffs) Is he gonna be all right? Is he gonna be all right? Well, a lad that size, swallowing all that detergent... Amazingly, I think he's going to be fine. (Both sigh) (Both sigh) Also, he's very clean. Yeah. There you go. Come on, George. This'll be fun. I don't want to go shopping. It's stupid. George! Maybe you should talk to him. So, George, I wanted to talk to you about Stuart. I want you to know that if you and he were to spend some real time together ` you know, brother time... Look at that one! Come on, George, you have a boat ` a beautiful one. It's not finished. Well, better get moving. The race is soon. So? Don't you want to race your boat, George? I'm not so good at the racing part. So what? It doesn't matter about winning. You try like heck, and you have fun. It doesn't matter about winning. You try like heck, and you have fun. Is it fun to finish last? Something formal, I should think. I'm not sure of the fabric, but it should breathe. He does have a tendency to burrow and climb and generally scurry about. Well, I'm sure we can find something to suit your particular need. Here we have Barbados Ben... Ooh! Ooh! ...Chef Ben... Ah! Ha. ...Lumberjack Ben, and of course, Gladiator Ben. Yes. Does Ben always dress like this? No, no, no, madam. There are many moods of Ben. And it all depends on the occasion. Well, what if the occasion were a simple family party? I think I have just the thing. There they are. George? George? Hmm. Uh,... shopping? Stuart? Everything all right in there? Don't come in! Shy. (Stuart coughs) How do I look? Fantastic. I hardly recognise you. Very smart. You look just like a Little. I do? Whew, good! I was worried I was going to look just like Ben. DOORBELL RINGS IDYLLIC MUSIC AND MERRIMENT Crenshaw! Frederick! Little high, little low. ALL: Little hey, little ho! GENERAL CHATTER Yes, where is my new nephew? The Little family's getting bigger and bigger! Boy! That's a lot of Littles! Uncle Crenshaw! Uncle Crenshaw! (Laughs) There's my favourite little nephew. Oh! You can't say that any more, Crenshaw. That's right ` now we have two favourite little nephews. Where is the lad? He has a lot of gifts to open. Are any of those for me? Are any of those for me? (All mutter awkwardly) Uh, you see, George... Attention, everybody. We'd like to introduce you to someone. This is Stuart. Hello... everyone. He's a... a... ALL: Adorable! That's right! Oh, Stuart, look! Oh, wow. Look at that. Is that...? That's the real Schmelling? STUART: Those are the best kind! You know what they say? If it ain't Schmelling... All: It ain't bowling! Lookie here, Stuart! Climb on up here, son. Plant your caboose right up here. He may have to grow into it. I think he's grown a little since we've been here. That's what happened to me. One summer, I just shot right up. May I say something? In the orphanage, we used to tell fairy tales of finding our families and having a party like this. A party with cakes and presents and all varieties of meat loaf. A party with a big family who came from far away just to wish us well. I don't know much about families. This must be the nicest family in the world, I think. So I just wanted to thank each of you, because now I know fairytales are real. APPLAUSE 'Fairytales are real'?! Oy! I think I'm going to cough up a furball. And now, it's time for the best present of all. Something for you AND George. Something for you AND George. George. You go and stand next to Stuart. You go and stand next to Stuart. This is something that gave your father and me hours of enjoyment when we were young brothers, just like you and Stuart. This ball belonged to your great-great-grandfather, Jededaiah Little. Remember, Frederick? Those long summer days playing catch? George, why don't you take your brother outside and toss around the old horsehide? What do you say, George? You ready? What do you say, George? You ready? Are you all nuts?! Bicycles and bowling balls?! How's he going to toss a baseball? How's he gonna do any of those things? He's not my brother ` he's a mouse. MELANCHOLY MUSIC Time to go! Yes! Time to go! Yes! GUESTS CHATTER ELEANOR: Argh! Argh! FREDERICK: What? What? What?! Where? Hey! Argh, ugh! Stuart! Did I hurt you? What's the matter? What's the matter? I just wanted to ask you something, but you were already asleep. What did you want to ask us? About my real family. You know, the ones I look like. He hates us. He hates us. We've never been hated before. No, it's not that. It's not that at all. It's just that... something's missing. I feel an empty space inside me, and I just want to know what was there before. You have an empty space? That's so sad. Oh dear. I hope I haven't left you dismayed and disappointed. No! No! No, no. We don't feel dismayed and disappointed. Not at all. Are you sure? We're certain, Stuart. And if you want us to, we'll find out about your real parents. Well, goodnight, then. It's out of the question, and it's against the rules. Besides, it's very hard to track mouse families. They're not very good with paperwork. But he has an empty space. Are there problems with Stuart? Problems? No, no. No, not at all. Well, there's been a few... Difficulties. Difficulties? Like the cat trying to eat him when we first brought him home. He spat the boy right out, in one heck of a jiffy. Yeah? Mrs Keeper, he wants to know about his family. Any child would have questions about that. Yes. TENSE MUSIC Hey, Snow? I know that you and I got off on the wrong paw, and I just wanted to see if we could start off fresh. You know? Clean slate. What do you say? Want to be friends? Um... ..no. OK, then. Huh, he's playing with my head. He's trying to psyche me out. Sick little rodent! Hey, Snow, let me in - I'm starving! What's in the dish today? Oh, no. Monty the Mouth. If he sees Stuart, it'll be all over the neighbourhood! C'mon, let me in! Go away! There's no food here. Please? Shoo! You know, I'm not picky, as long as it ain't meatloaf. That gives me gas something awful. Sorry, it's meatloaf. Well, beggars can't be choosers. Load me up and light a match. Monty, stop. You don't want to do that. Why? I eat from garbage cans, drink from public toilets. A little gas isn't going to bother me. No, wait, don't! Oh great. What am I going to tell him now? Monty? I can explain. I... He's a... Explain what? Explain that you should stuff your face. Oh, thanks. Monty, I don't want to rush you, but you have to leave. The Littles are due back soon. They don't like strange cats in the house. Not that YOU'RE strange. Ha ha ha. (Shrieks) Hey, Snow, what's wrong with you? Nothing. You know, you're the one acting strange. What is it? Worms? Fleas? Yeah, you look pale. Ew, maybe you should see a vet. A vet?! What a swell idea! Do you know anybody? I'm unhappy with mine. He makes us wait, and his hands are cold. What was that? What was that what? What was that... WHAT?! Huh? Well, I hate to eat and run... No, please, by all means, run! Run like the wind. (Farts) WHOA! Pheugh! That was gross. Hey, Snow, I almost forgot to thank you. Uh... Hey! TENSE MUSIC What the...? Oh, no. OMINOUS MUSIC Aah! Oh, my pants. They're really putting some wild prizes in there, huh, Monty? Huh? Oh, hello. You must be a friend of Snowbell's. I'm Stuart. Aren't you going to run? Why? 'Cause you're a mouse... I'm not just a mouse. I'm also a member of this family. (Groans) A mouse with a pet cat? (Laughs heartily) A mouse with a pet cat! I guess that is pretty funny. "Pretty funny"?! (Laughs) I'm gonna wet my fur! A mouse with a pet cat! (Laughs) Your new little master! Wait till the boys hear about this! Oh, the humiliation! I'm gonna kill you! Oh dear! Come back here! ACTION MUSIC (Growls) Aaah...ow! Oh! (Growls) Ow! Alright, no more Mr Nice Kitty. You! Aah! Get out of there! You can't go in there. That's George's room! Come back! Come on out! I'm not going to hurt you. I just want to show you something. C'mon! (Cries out) ARGGH... Uh! Wow! What are you doing here? Aagh! Aagh! Oh! I just thought I'd drop in. Did you build all these? And my dad. Wow. This is incredible. It's like being in a real live Western. (Tough voice) Howdy, pardner. WESTERN MUSIC Draw, you lily-livered, yellow-bellied son of a one-eyed prairie dog! Pow! Pow! Pow! Pow! Pow! Pow! Pow! Pow! I'm trying to concentrate. Oh, sorry. WESTERN HARMONICA MUSIC TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWS Is...is that a train? What's it look like, picklehead? Can we play with it? Please, please, please, please, please, please, please. DRAMATIC MUSIC Help! Somebody help me! TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWS Help! Please, somebody help me! Ta da! Thank you very much. You're crazy. Thank you. Thank you. Hey. I have an idea. WONDROUS MUSIC Hop in. Wow! A roadster! Go ahead. Check it out. (Sniffles) Stuart, what's wrong? Nothing. I... It's just... It's the first time I fit in since I got here. What's that? Oh, that. That's the 'Wasp'. Wow. She is beautiful. Yeah, but she's not finished. When are you going to finish it? Well, me and my dad were building her. But I decided to stop. How come? I'm too little for a race like that. Little?! You're not little. Well, not to me. Stuart, you've never seen one of these races. There's hundreds of people there. Everybody from school. I mean...what if you lost? Well, at least you'll have been somewhere. Come on, George. What do you say? Let's get started. You know, I'm not really sure I want a brother. Well, how about a friend? I guess I could always use a friend. George? Yes, Dad? Have you seen Stuart? He's down here with me. What are you doing to him? He's helping me finish the 'Wasp'. That's...that's wonderful, son. That's terrific. Can't race her like this. Right, George? Right. Well, when's the next race? Two days. Two days? We'll be ready. How about we all go together? That's a wonderful idea. That would be great. All of us together. The whole family! SNOWBELL: "The whole family"! (Sobs) (Tough voice) I'm telling you, Snowy, this guy can fix anything. But they're alley cats! They're mean, they're vicious, they're all hopped up on catnip. Quit being such a scaredy-cat. You want to get rid of the mouse? Of course! Alright, then. Hey! Hey, Smokey! Smokey, it's me! It's me, Monty. What is it now? Well, my friend Snowbell here needs a favour. Snowbell? (Chuckles) Now, there's a manly name. Yeah. You see, sir, I've got this mouse at home I can't eat. Sensitive stomach? (Laughs) NO! I can't eat him 'cause... (Clears throat) ..he's a member of the family. A mouse with a pet cat? (Laughs) Isn't that funny? Oh. That's not funny! That's sick. A cat can't have a rodent for a master. What's this world coming to? It's against the laws of nature. Word gets out, it'll be bad for cats all over. Think you can help me? Consider it done. Did you hear that, Monty? Thank you, Mr Smokey, sir. I'll never forget this. Really. Don't worry, Tinkerbell. I'm all over it. (Guffaws) Tinkerbell! He called me Tinkerbell! You're a funny guy. Yeah, right. Whatever. (Laughs) Sheesh! House cats! Are you sure he'll keep this hush-hush? You kidding? Cat's got his tongue! Get it? Cat's got his tongue cos he's a cat. Shut up. OK. MC: Ahoy, fellow yachtsmen! And welcome, everyone, to the 92nd annual Central Park Boat Race, undoubtedly model racing's most prestigious event. Children from all over New York gather here every year to see whose boat will prevail. Who will win the race and take home the magnificent trophy? Will it be...? Anchor up? Check. Stays all battened? Check. Rudder? Check. Sail? Check. Third line? Check. They're doing checks. So, George, Stuart, would you like a hotdog? Check! Check. MC: And from Manhattan's Upper West Side, the 'Wasp', piloted by George Little. Well, everything appears to be in shipshape. But to be on the safe side, I'd better check the hull for leaks. ..'Lillian B. Womrat', piloted by Anton Garliment. Oh, no! Anton! Gee, George. What did you do? Get that out of a cereal box? I'm glad you're here, George. Someone's got to finish last. I don't like that child. All set to get under way. (Clears throat) It's time to get those boats in the water and grab your remotes. Stuart, could you get the remote? Aye-aye, Captain. Our most recent weather report shows winds east-south-easterly... ..10 knots, and gusts to 14 knots. So, racers, please rig accordingly. Wow. Doesn't she look great? Uh-oh! Are you OK? Maybe we should go home. Why? I'm not wearing my lucky underwear. You don't have lucky underwear. Well, maybe we should get some and then come back for another race. (Pants) WAYWARD WALTZ George, listen, I know how worried you are about losing, believe me. But you know what we say - the thing that really matters is to never stop trying, OK? OK. That's the spirit. Everyone to your places. The race is about to start. (Yells) I... Where's Stuart? (Yells) Look out, sir! One minute to race time, ladies and gentlemen. Stuart? We have one minute... Are you hurt? Stuart, what happened? It was completely my fault. I couldn't grip it. Nice going, Captain Loser! All set to get under way! We need all boats on the starting line... George, wait! Everything will be alright. No, it won't. Well, maybe we could fix it. Huh? A little glue. Who'll know? Mom. This is awful. Our first family outing and I ruined everything. Well, you know, Stuart, these things happen. But what about George? I'll be right back. Everyone in this race is a winner. One person will take home the trophy in the 92nd annual Central Park Boat Race. George, you know what? Just 'cause we can't be in the race, it doesn't mean our family outing has to be ruined. I really think... All boats to your marks! Ready and... HOOTER SOUNDS And they're racing! CHEERING I think we should just go home. The sails are full, and there's a... ..mouse on the boat?! Stuart! Stuart! George! Stuart! (Laughs) What are you doing? Sailing - I hope. Stuart, come back here this minute! I can't! Why not? I don't know how! MC: The competitors are jockeying visibly... Frederick, I don't like this one bit! Stuart, your mother doesn't like this one bit! I'm OK, Mom! Go, Stuart! Down the mainsail! What's a mainsail? Oh! Once the boats get past the footbridge... Come on, Stuart! Gee, George, you all done crying? Yeah. You all done being a jerk? No. Don't worry, George. I won't let you down. Away the boats are sailing! EPIC MUSIC Oh, Frederick, what if he falls? Remember, he's quite a fine swimmer. EVIL MUSIC Hey, that's cheating. You can't do that. Well, I just did. Oh, dear. EVIL MUSIC Whoa! Arggh! (Gulps) WIND GUSTS Arggh! Whoa... Arggh! What's he doing? I think he's hiking out. DRAMATIC MUSIC Hope that mouse can swim. P.A.: 'Wasp' is gonna take the lead. Stuart! Look out! Huh? Arggh! That can't be good! Look what that stupid mouse did to my sail! He's not a stupid mouse. You're right. He's a stupid rat! Whoa! Whoa! HEROIC MUSIC Hey, hey, hey! Get off me! Get off! George! Stuart! Arggh! Whoa! Something's wrong! What's happening? (Breathes heavily) Arggh! Yeah! Yeah! TRIUMPHANT MUSIC CHEERING, WHISTLING Who is that mouse anyway? That's no mouse. That's my brother. (Laughs) BOTH: Little high, little low! ALL: Little hey, little ho! Frederick, look at them. You know what? This calls for a picture. GENTLE MUSIC What's wrong? What's wrong? Well, it's just, uh,... you four look great together. This is the happiest moment of my life. I just feel... I feel 10 inches tall. DOORBELL RINGS DOORBELL RINGS I'll get that. Mr Little? Yes? Mr Little? Yes? Down here. Very sorry to disturb you at your lovely abode. Very sorry to disturb you at your lovely abode. I hope we're not intruding. My name's Reginald Stout. This is my wife, Camille. An extreme pleasure. An extreme pleasure. We're looking for Stuart. An extreme pleasure. We're looking for Stuart. Are you... friends of his? (Chuckles) Not exactly. ELEANOR: Fellow yachtsmen? Guess again. ELEANOR: Fellow yachtsmen? Guess again. Reggie, just tell 'em. We're his parents! Hmm. Ah! CRUNCH! Mmm! Mmm! Mmm! Mmm! Reggie! Stop it! (Chuckles) (Sighs) (Chuckles) (Sighs) (Chews peanut) Um,... it's so good to see you again, Stuart. There's so much we have to catch up on. Why didn't you want me? Why didn't you want me? Stuart, it shames me to say this, but you weren't born into a prosperous home. That's right. We couldn't feed you, dear. Couldn't feed him? How much could he eat? George, please. George, please. Letting you go was the toughest choice we ever made. It was? It was? Yes. But now we can be a family again. Absolutely. Are these salted? Mmm! Mmm! Dear? The children. Uh, yeah. Uh, George, Stuart, I think we need to talk to the Stouts alone. Don't worry. Mom and Dad will take care of it. Mr and Mrs Stout, I'm afraid there's been a mistake. Right. Stuart can't leave with you. He's... One of the family. Exactly. You may feel like he's family. But he'll never really be family. You may not realise it, but I'm sure he does. There's something you'll never be able to give him, because you're human ` no offence! It's a place that you'll never be able to fill. An empty space. Mom? Dad? You want me to leave? No! Oh, dear, we just want what's best for you. But Stuart lives here! George, come on. It's hard for all of us. This stinks! I don't understand. I thought I was in a fairytale. Fairytales are made-up stories, Stuart. This is real! This is about where you belong. Please come home, Stuart. Your real home. You're going to love it, son! We live on a golf course. We look right over the ninth fairway! It's beautiful. Beautiful! (Whistles) Hey, taxi! Oh! What's a mouse have to do to get a cab in this city? SAD MUSIC You'll speak to George for me, won't you? I'd hate to say goodbye to a basement door. Of course. Of course. Taxi! Yo! Yo, taxi! Time to go, Stuart. Well, goodbye. We love you. We love you. I, uh... I love you too, Mom... (Clears throat) Mrs Little. SAD MUSIC CONTINUES Boy, that looks heavy. You need some help with that? Camille? Huh? Huh? Frederick, let's do something. What? What? Let's just make them go away. We're bigger than they are. We'll say, 'Go! Shoo!' We'll scare their little whiskers off. Eleanor, you're not being rational. Rational-schmational. Something about this is not right. I just know it. Look at them. They just fit. So what? I have shoes that fit, and I hate them. As Stuart's mother, I... But you're not. She is. Stuart! Wait. Wait. George? I want you to have this. Oh, George. Not the roadster, George. You love this car. I... I couldn't. I want you to. Thanks, George. Thanks, George. I wish you didn't have to go. I'm going to miss you. I'm going to miss you. I'll miss you too, George. POIGNANT MUSIC SURGES (Miaows) SAD MUSIC MANDOLIN WALTZ INTRODUCTION TO 'THAT'S AMORE' (Stouts sing) # When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, # that's amore... # REGGIE: Sing with me, Stuey! REGGIE: Sing with me, Stuey! (Stuart joins in) # When the world seems to shine # like you've had too much wine, # that's amore... # CAMILLE: You'll have to tell me your favourite foods so I can fix them for you, Stuart. What for? You can't cook. I can learn. We're a family now. There's a lot of adjustments we'll all have to make. Right, Reggie? Right, Camille. Well, here we are, Stuey. The family home. The family home. Mind you, this is just our summer place. In wintertime, we live in a crawl space above a delicatessen. You like corn beef, Stuey? How is it prepared? Prepared? It drops out of a fat guy's mouth, we grab it and run! Sounds like an acquired taste. (Laughs) Acquired taste! I love this kid. Your new bedroom, Stuart. Your new bedroom, Stuart. Hope you like it. Well, goodnight. Sleep tight. Don't let the bedbugs bite. Hey, I'm serious about those bedbugs. Keep an eye open. SAD MUSIC It's very kind of you to come and check on us like this. Actually, I had something to tell you. But first, how are things going? Oh, it's been difficult. Difficult? No, very difficult. Very difficult? Worse. Worse than very difficult? Worse than very difficult? Yes, it's been almost... Unbearable. Just the word I was looking for. Oh, maybe this isn't a good time, then. You see, I came over to give you some news. What type of news? What type of news? Uh,... they had an accident. Who? Who? Stuart's parents. Oh, my goodness! Well, are they all right? No. They didn't make it. Oh, no! Oh, my... What happened? Well, apparently, they were grocery shopping, canned food aisle. There was an unsteady pyramid of cans, and it collapsed. It took three bag boys to dig them out. They had to identify them by their dental records. Oh, how horrible! Oh, how horrible! Cream of mushroom soup, two-for-one sale. That's a very heavy soup. That's a very heavy soup. How is Stuart taking it? Well, he doesn't know. You mean, no one's told him? Does he have to know? Well, six months after they don't come back from shopping, isn't he going to wonder where they went? But they've been gone for years. Years?! How is that possible? How is that possible? Because they died years ago. Which part is confusing you? Stuart's parents came and took him away three days ago. Three days ago? Stuart's parents died in a tragic cream mushroom soup incident years ago ` I told you. Dear, we have to take this up with the police! Hmm? SIREN WAILS DRAMATIC MUSIC DOORBELL RINGS Mrs Little? Yes. I'm Detective Sherman. This is my partner, Detective Allen. We understand your son is missing. Thank you for coming. They know about the Stouts! The jig is up! What are we gonna do? What are you talking about? Jeez, Monty, I'm in big... I'm in deep poopy-do! Calm down. Don't get your fur in a bunch. All we need is a new plan. We do what we should have done in the first place. We scratch him out. We scratch him out. Scratch him out? But, Smokey, the police are involved. I don't want to get kicked out of my house! I'm not a street cat. I don't wanna lose my furry basket or my tinkle bone! Snow, buddy, pull yourself together. Snow, buddy, pull yourself together. It's settled. Stuart Little gets scratched tonight. SOMBRE MUSIC OK. Very good. Mr and Mrs Little, you'll have to come downtown. Detective Sherman, what are our chances of seeing Stuart again? You want it straight? No. Absolutely not. Well, er...in that case... ..Stuart's probably home right now, waiting for you. Huh. Maybe we should hear it a little straighter than that. OK. In a case like this, if the kidnappers have not called by now, then they're not interested in money. What are they interested in? Kicks. Exactly. It's my guess these two sickos are on some kind of cross-country mouse-killing spree. Oh, no. Well, thank you. Yes, you can kiss this boy goodbye. (Gasps) Thank you, Detective. Yeah. It's over. The things I've seen! Phil, where's that book on the grisly photos? Believe me, you don't want to see this! Uh-huh, no. Well... It'll only take a second. Whew! Right off the bat! Look at this one! This one kept me awake for weeks. Oh! Oh! GRIM MUSIC What do they want? (Sighs) Where's the boy? Oh, no! Stuart, wake up. Get dressed. STUART: Why? We're taking you for a ride. Where are we going? Some friends of ours have gathered, just to meet you. A gathering? What should I wear? It doesn't matter. Wear anything. Is it formal? Just put something on! (Weeps softly) Why is Mom crying? Mom? I'm not angry at you for putting me up for adoption. And now that I'm a Stout again, I'll always be here to take care of you. (Weeps hysterically) Because that's what families do. Mom, they...they take care of each other. (Wails) Ow! Tell him the truth! You made a deal with a cat? He had us cornered in a cup on the fifth hole. It was curtains. So you agreed to pose as my parents? BOTH: Yes. You lied and cheated? BOTH: Yes! You took me away from the Littles, just when we were all so happy? BOTH: Yes! That's wonderful! I think you missed something. Let me go over it again. That's why I've been feeling so sad! That's why I keep thinking of them! I'm not a Stout! I'm a Little! I'm Stuart Little! EMOTIONAL MUSIC SWELLS (Yells) I'm Stuart Little! Stuart, please! You have to listen to us! The cats have decided you're too risky to keep around anymore. They ordered us to hand you over to them. As your fake father, I order you to run! I'll go home. Home?! No, no. That's miles from here. It's dark, and every cat in the city is looking for you. Besides, you could get lost. No. No, I can't! Every Little in the world can find the Little house. TYRES SCREECH 'Bye, fake father! 'Bye, fake mother! Goodbye, fake son. Goodbye, Stuart. (Softly) I'm going to miss that boy. I'm going to miss that car. SOFT, WISTFUL MUSIC George. I think we have to. Tell him. Yeah. WOMAN: 627 Fifth Avenue. I need three cabs. Uncle Little! That's right. Three cabs. OK. Here's $500. What's going on? We're making posters. We'll put them all over the city. That's right. They describe Stuart and offer a reward if anyone finds him. It was all George's idea. George... Never stop trying - right, Dad? Listen, I... ..I'm afraid this isn't going to work. Why not? Frederick... 'Cause...there's no picture. We need a picture of Stuart. The family photo. HEROIC MUSIC CAT: Smokey! Hey, Smokey! Keep it down. Hey, it's me - Lucky. I just heard from the Brooklyn cats. Bad news - the Stouts squealed. I knew those mice were rats. The kid's on his way home. What do we do? No problem. He'll go through the park. Let's meet him and have ourselves a little picnic. Oh, great! I'll bring herring. Hey, hey, hey! Moron! The mouse IS the picnic! Oh! OMINOUS MUSIC BRIAN SETZER'S 'IF YOU CAN'T ROCK ME' PLAYS ON RADIO # Well, if you can't rock me # I'm gonna rock this town myself # Well, if you can't rock me # I'm gonna tear it up with somebody else # I may have to search all across the land # Just to find me a gig in a rock'n'roll band # If you can't rock me # Well, I'll find somebody who... # MUSIC STOPS LOW, UNSETTLING MUSIC STUART: Every Little in the world can find the Little house. I'm a Little. I'm a Little. I'm a little lost. TERRIFYING MUSIC (Gasps) RUSTLING (Gasps) (Whimpers) (Gulps) How are you doing? You must be Stuart. Actually, I must be going. What's your hurry, Murray? Yeah, where you going, Murray? Er...Stuart? What's his name? TYRES SQUEAL Hey! Come back here, you little rat! He's getting away! Lucky! Red! Get him! TENSE MUSIC I'm on it! He's a hell of a driver! Come on! We've got him! I've got him, Smokey! No, I've got him! The only thing you guys got are big mouths! Shut up and run! Aaaargghhhhhh! (Gasps) Geronimo! (Hollers war cry) STARTER MOTOR WHIRRS We've got him now! (Softly) Come on! ENGINE STARTS I got him! I got him! Get him, Red! (Whimpers) Whoa! I hope he runs out of gas! Hope you do! Why don't you run at the back? I can't help it. I have a nervous stomach. And mine's empty! Now, get that mouse! (Screams) Aaarrrghhhhh! Did you see that? Damn! Nobody could have survived that! Right boss? Yeah. The mouse is sleeping with the fishes. A long, wet nap. Hey! The sewer rat's alive! After him! Oh, no way! I'm a cat. I don't do water. Alright, Red. You go. You wanna do water, hire a spaniel. I don't believe this! What are you - a bunch of house cats? (Pants) Whoa. Oh, no! Oh, no! Oh, dear! Oh, dear! Oh, dear-oh-dear! Waaaa! (Groans) Ah! # I can see it in your eyes, # I sometimes see you pass outside my door. TEXT MESSAGE DINGS # Hello? TEXT MESSAGE CHIMES # ...you're looking for? # I can see it in your eyes, # I can see it in your smile. TEXT MESSAGE DINGS # You're all I've ever wanted, # and my arms are open wide. TEXT MESSAGE CHIMES # Cos you know just what to say, # and you know just what to do. # And I want to tell you so much # I love you. # Crenshaw, Tina, Uncle Stretch - you go uptown. Cover as many streets as you can. Edgar, Beatrice, Spencer - you take downtown. Every side street and back alley. Alright. Estelle... ..you'd better go with them. Where do I go? You come with us. We're going to circle the park. (Grunts) We'll be making a lot of stops. I made it! I can't believe it. (Tearfully) I'm home! Mom! Dad! I'm coming! TRIUMPHANT MUSIC Mom! Dad! George! It's me - Stuart! I'm back! Mom! Dad! George! Where is everybody? SNOWBELL: There's nobody else here. It's just you and me, kid. Where did they go? Movies, I think. Movies? Oh, yeah. Ever since you left, it's just movies, parties, rollerskating, amusement parks. They're having the time of their lives. They are? Oh, sure. Stuart, I hate to have to tell you this, but they're celebrating. Celebrating what? Can't you guess? No. They were just so happy to get rid of you. That's a lie! I don't believe that. Oh, boy. I wish I could spare you this. This is going to break your little heart. Look up there. At what? See for yourself. (Grunts) MELANCHOLY MUSIC They did that right after you left. Mrs Little said, "Who wants to look at that face anymore?" She did? Yeah. And George? She gave it to him and he tore it up. He did? Yeah. I'd give you the pieces, but Mr Little set them on fire. I tried to warn you, Stuart. I told you it wasn't going to work out. I should have known. It was too good to be true. What are you going to do now? I don't know. I guess I'll just... Leave immediately? Good idea. I'll tell the family you dropped by, although it'll probably just make them sick. 'Bye, Snowbell. Goodbye, buddy. This is...killing me. George... But I'm almost done. It's getting late. Time to go home. I don't think I missed a single tree. You did a great job. It was a good idea. You bet it was. It's a really good picture of Stuart. I don't think you could take a bad picture of Stuart. Now all we have to do is wait until somebody calls and tells us where Stuart is. Right. FORLORN MUSIC DIAL TONE HUMS (Whispers) If we don't find Stuart, it's going to break his heart. Hey, Snow! One of the guys spotted Stuart in the park. Smokey sent me to get you. Gee, Monty. I'm in for the night. Besides, Stuart's gone. Can't we give the kid a break? Besides, Stuart's gone. Can't we give the kid a break? Of course we can give him a break. First, we'll break his arms, then his legs, and then we'll take a break. But first, let's find him. We gotta run! Why do we have to run? What is it ` festival seating? SMOKEY: Come on! Come on! I think we're getting closer. I can smell him. LUCKY: Sorry, Smokey. That was me. LUCKY: Sorry, Smokey. That was me. RED: Didn't your mothers say not to go into Central Park at night? My mother was the REASON you didn't. Yeah! You tell them, Smokey! Yeah! You tell them, Smokey! She was one tough broad. She was a saint. (Pants) Quick question ` who knows CPR? I... (Pants) I... (Pants) There are mouse prints going everywhere! How will we find him? How will we find him? We'll split up and go in different directions. What a brain! That's why he's 'Gatto di tutti i gatti'. (Pants) You guys go ahead. I'll just collapse right here. TWIGS CRACK Oh. POIGNANT MUSIC Aw. Stuart, is that you? What are you doing up there? Oh, I'm...I'm settling in. Look, Stuart, you've got to get out of here. This is Central Park. There are hungry cats everywhere! Stuart, where are you? Look. It's your pal Monty. What's he doing here? Shhh! He'll hear you. Why shouldn't he hear me? Snowbell, buddy! What are you doing up there? Oh, no. Perfect. Hey! You've found him! Attaboy! Hey, everybody! Over here! Hey, guys! Snow found him! SMOKEY: Nice going, house cat. For that, when we cough up the mouse, you get the big half. Big half? Snowbell, what's he talking about? Do you know those cats? Er...well, not really. We went to a few parties, but... What's the matter? What are you waiting for? Buddy, bring him down! I'm starving! (Groans) STUART: Snowbell... Sorry, kid. Snowbell, wait! No! Stop! Wait! No! Put me down! Snowbell, buddy! Hit me! I'm open! I'll break his fall with my mouth! I guess you do know 'em. Let him go! I can almost taste him! What are you waiting for? Hey! Where are you going? He's hogging the mouse! He ain't sharing! Get him! RED: He's getting away! Let's get him! Go! Go! Snowbell, watch it! Where you going?! LUCKY: Hey! Hold that branch for me! Ow! Get out of my face! SMOKEY: Get him! Snowbell! You saved me? Yeah, yeah. Look, let's get one thing straight - I'm doing this for the Littles, alright? They love you. George loves you. They're all miserable without you. But, Snowbell...you...you said... I know what I said. I...I lied, OK? Welcome to Manhattan. I'm the one that hates you. Ah, Snowbell! You do care! EMOTIONAL MUSIC Ugh! Yeah, yeah. OK. OK, that's enough. Snow, what's he doing to your leg? I can't help but think this is wrong. What the hell's going on here? Er...look, Smokey. Call me fickle, but, er...I want to call this whole thing off, OK? Too late. Come on, Smokey! Can't we talk it over? You know, Stuart's not so bad once you get to know him. And he's got his own car! Careful, house cat. You're asking for it. Snow, what are you doing? Come on! He's just a mouse. He's not just a mouse. He's... ..he's... ..he's family. Oh, yeah! (Cackles) I can see the resemblance. (Cats laugh) Is that what you think - you have to look alike to be family? ALL: Huh? You don't have to look alike. You don't even have to like each other. Look at Snowbell! He hates me, and still he's trying to save me. Sure, you'll probably scratch him up pretty bad. You may even kill him. (Gulps) But Snowbell will not run away. And THAT is what family is all about! Right? Snow? (Chuckles) Maybe 'family's too strong a word. Scratch 'em both. Both? HEROIC MUSIC Hey, it's me you want! Come and get me! RED: Let me at him! Whoa! Yeeeeeeeee-ha! Get him. Watch it! Out of my way! Get him! He's getting away! Stop him! Wa-a-a-a! Where is he? In the water? Don't know. I saw something hit. Man! Did you see that? Gone! He just disappeared. Hey! Here he is! Huh? Up there! He's too far. I can't reach him. In that case, you can all go home! Prowl safely. Here you go, boys. Dinner's served. Alright, Smokey. Way to go! Oh, dear! It's mouse on a stick! I love mouse on a stick! A little further. Keep him coming, keep him coming! Right. I can almost reach him. Keep it coming. I got him. He's mine. TENSE MUSIC SWELLS Arggh! CRACK! Hey! What the...? The branch is gonna... Well, what have we got here? Snow, don't come out here! The branch is breaking! Stuart, are you alright? Yeah. Yeah, I'm OK. Just hang on. I'll take it from here. Huh? Take what? BRANCH CRACKS Hey! Come on, Snow! You wouldn't do this to me! Not your old buddy. Don't worry, buddy. I'm sure you'll land... Hey, Snow! What are you doing?! ..on your... No! Wait, Snow! I've got to ask you something! ..feet! (Cats scream) Cold! Cold! Cold water! I can't swim! Dog paddle. Dog paddle? I'd rather drown! And I had my fur just the way I like it. I'll be licking myself for days! (Whimpers pathetically) How could he do this to me? After all we've meant to each other! (Hyperventilates) I mean, I love that guy! And... (Whimpers) Hey, you guys! Wait up for me! Ha-ha! Pack up the pineapple, Stuart. This luau's over. Thanks, Snowbell. You were great. Well, it must've been quite a show from up there. (Coughs) Snowbell. Ha-ha! Those cats think they're so tough! Snowbell. I guess I showed them. Ha! Not bad for a house cat! Ha-ha-ha! Not bad for a dead house cat. (Whimpers fearfully) Say goodnight, Tinkerbell. (Gulps) Hey, Smokey! His name is Snowbell. Yai! Argh! (Hyperventilates) Oh, this water's damn cold! I can't believe this! Brr! Beaten by a mouse and his pet cat! What could be worse? BARKING Oh! Nice doggies! No! No! (Tsks) Little high, little low. Little hey, little ho. (Sighs) Let's go home. You know, Snow, I don't know how to thank you. How about not kicking me in the sides? I'm beginning to bruise. How about not kicking me in the sides? I'm beginning to bruise. Sorry. I was getting excited. I've never ridden a cat bareback before. Well, don't get used to it. Hold on, cowboy! Whoop! Thanks for the ride. Thanks for the ride. Don't mention it... ever. EMOTIONAL MUSIC (Muffled) Mom! Dad! George! It's me ` Stuart! Come back! UPLIFTING MUSIC SWELLS Stuart! Mom! Dad! George! I missed you all so much! I thought I'd never see you again. How did you manage it? Every Little in the world can find the Little house. And...and Snowbell. I just couldn't have done it without him. Oh, really? What's the matter? Oh, I was just thinking. What, dear? If this is how people look... At the end of a fairytale. Yeah. Exactly. JOYOUS ORCHESTRAL MUSIC SONG: # Baby, show me 1 + 1 is 2 # Show me all the things that you can do # Show me that you need me # Show me that you love me # Baby, show me 1 + 1 is 2 # Baby, show me 1 + 1 is 2 # Show me all the things that you can do # Show me that you breathe me # Show me that you hug me # Baby, show me 1 + 1 is 2 # One, two... # Whew! Whoa-whoa-whoa! Miaow! # 1 + 1 is 2 # Show me all the things that you can do # Show me that you need me Show me that you love me # Baby, show me 1 + 1 is 2 # One, two... # Miaow! CRASH! TENDER SONG INTRO (Trisha Yearwood sings) # Yeah. # I am home now, # home now. # I've been waiting for forever to find you, # to find you. # I'm not alone now, # alone now, # cos you've taken in my heart from the cold. # All I know is every time I look into your eyes, # I'm home. # I know #uYou're where I belong. # I belong with you. # You're where I belong. # And I know it's the truth. # You're part of my heart. # There's nothing I can do. # Oh, you're the one who keeps me warm. # My baby, you're where I belong. # You're my first taste, # my first taste # of the sweetest feeling I've ever known, # that I have known. # You're my safe place, # my safe place # from a world that can be so cruel and cold. # You're my harbour. You're my shelter. # You're that welcome smile # that lets me know I'm home. # You're where I belong. # I belong with you. # You're where I belong. # And I know it's the truth. # You're part of my heart. # There's nothing I can do. # Oh, you're the one who keeps me warm. # My baby, you're where I belong. # You're the one I come to. # You're the one I come to. # Yeah. # To keep me from the cold. # You're where I belong. # I belong with you. # You're where I belong. # And I know it's the truth. # You're part of my heart. # There's nothing I can do. # Oh, you're the one who keeps me warm. # My baby, you're where I belong. # You're where I belong. You're my only home. # You're where I belong. # You're where I belong. # You're where I belong. You're my only home. # You're where I belong. # You're where I belong. # You're where I belong. You're my only one. # You're where I belong. # I am home now, # home now. # Supertext Captions by the Australian Caption Centre www.auscap.com.au Captions were made possible with funding from NZ On Air.