Gods, what are they doing? Mmm, painful, isn't it? They're translating. Ah! Oh...so...slowly. In their minds, they're working in the ancient library of the gods. (LAUGHS) They think that what they're doing will change the world. -So you have the Sacred Scrolls? -Just the one I want. I'd begun to lose hope that these stubborn little jobsworths would ever finish. You see, a god's mind, it will always find a way to resist. But now I don't need 'em, because I've got you. Young, energetic, malleable, human you. What will happen when it's translated? (SUCKS TEETH AND INHALES) Well, that's for me to know... (WHISPERS) ..and you to find out. Able 2018 MONKEY: This place used to be beautiful. Now it's full of bloodthirsty demons. PIGSY: What does Davari want with Tripitaka? MONKEY: Nothing good. Psst! -Psst! -Do you hear that? Yeah, it's an old lady. Don't look at her. -She's probably a witch. -A witch? Yeah, don't look at her. Don't look at her! -She wants us to follow. -Yeah, not happening. Not following a witch down a dark alley. -Ignore her. -Let me talk. Monkey. Monkey! (WHISPERS) Monkey! Monkey! (WHISPERS) Davari's getting closer to translating a scroll. MONKEY: Which scroll does he have? The scroll of how should I know? But he's pretty keyed up about it, especially now that he's got your little friend by his side. Tripitaka would never help a demon. There'll be no choice, believe me. Huh! -(STAMMERS) -What? I'm just having a moment. Here we are. (CHUCKLES) Gods and demons. Worth a pause, isn't it? Er... It's...unusual. RAXION: Davari's weak spot is that he likes to be liked. Once a week, he goes out amongst his people. His route is preplanned, so position yourselves where I've marked. He'll sense you if you're near him, so keep your distance. Oh, and if you stuff this up, I will drop you like a stone. Probably be the one who has to execute you. -You're gonna execute me? -OK, we got it. Throwing spears, arrows. Thanks for your collaboration but we should probably... I mean, if I were you I would... You. Execute me? OK. OK. OK. OK. No, no, just... Thank you. Beat it. Just go now. (WHISTLES) Hello! Comfortable? Sleep. Tomorrow I'll show you around. I like to buy something normal and meaningless, like normal, average, meaningless people do every day. Greetings. Oh. There's Tripitaka. Aren't you supposed to be out on the field? What do you want? To thank you for giving me another chance. To prove myself. Don't flatter yourself. We were short of labour. -Monkey. Monkey! -Go. -Get them! -GUARD: Yes, sir! Not you, you chicken brains. Now, now, now, who do you suppose that was? I... (EXHALES) And how do you suppose they got in? I don't know. They're...stealthy, eh? I know your stupid plans before you even think them up. Ciao, Raxion. No, wait, wait! You would have done the same. You know, you never believed in me. You...you always treated me like one of your brain-dead puppets. I worked for centuries, gave everything to forward our cause and all I wanted was a seat at the table. Just once. And now... (LAUGHS) Now I will become who I was always meant to be. Raxion will be the master of his own destiny. Hmm? Raxion will be a he... (BOTH GRUNT) GUARD: They went this way! GUARD: Down here! Come this way. Quickly. After them! This way! Hello. Thank you for helping us. We mean you no harm. Who are you? Tell us your names. I'm sorry, my son is a little rude. Tell us your names. (CLEARS THROAT) I am Monkey. And you must be one of the less important warriors. Yes, I am Pigsy, one of the less important warriors. My name is Shamai. This is my partner, Lusio, my sons, Silver and Oak. For many, many generations we have lived in the Jade Mountain. We are the hidden Resistance. We have been waiting for the return of the Monkey King. (WHISPERS) Monkey! -To free the world of the demonic plague... -Monkey! ..to return truth and light. Excellent news. Tell us the plan. MONKEY: Hmm. Plan. Destroy Davari. (BOTH SPIT) And save Tripitaka. Yes, of course, Pigsy. That was assumed. I was just going for the headline. Destroy Davari. (BOTH SPIT) * The word is you're not doing your work. Maybe you don't know how to translate this text. Maybe the Shaman was wrong. Well, if that's the case, then I guess that makes you completely expendable. I don't think you understand. I'm rather in a hurry. Now, prove to me you can translate the text or say hello to the abyss at the bottom of the palace. Nobody knows how deep it truly is, but those who have made the trip have screamed for a very, very long time. TRIPITAKA: I won't translate. Stop! Stop. Oh, brave. Very brave. Begin. You're ill. What now? That's why you're in a hurry. (LAUGHS) Oh, brilliant! Doctor, monk, boy, girl. Wrong. I am not ill. I'm just very old, OK? I would like to live forever. Is that so much to ask? Now, begin. So you can become immortal. (SIGHS) Begin. No. DAVARI: Psst! TRIPITAKA: No. No, wait. Please! Poor flower. Goodbye, old friend. No! Every day you refuse to translate, one more of your precious gods will be... (BLOWS RASPBERRY) ..destroyed. Tripitaka the God Killer. Now, that has a nice ring to it, don't you think? Let's discuss a plan. With the arsenal of weapons we can storm the palace and smash them to pieces. That is one way, but you must remember that we are humans, not gods, and we were expecting three gods. However, the timing of your arrival cannot be better. -Davari... -(SPITS) ..is holding a banquet ..for the most powerful demons in the land. We've been hired as musicians for the event. Do either of you possess any skills in that area? Well, I can hold a tune. You wouldn't pass for a professional, though. Well, maybe not a solo, but in the chorus I'd manage. -He's tone-deaf. -(CHUCKLES) There's something not right about this banquet. Davari is planning something. It might be our last chance to stop him. The Scholar spoke of a monk, two warriors and the Monkey King. You said there was a third. We must wait for him. Her. The third is a her. And has quite a nice falsetto. (BIRD SQUAWKS) GUARD: Compliments of Davari. Put it on. (KEYS JANGLE, LOCK CLICKS) (PIGSY SIGHS) Monkey, what are you doing? There's only enough for one of us. (SIGHS) They've been saving that for generations. The boys told me. I have to make sure Tripitaka is OK. If you get caught, the whole plan'll be ruined. We can't let this family, or the Resistance, down. I won't get caught. (INHALES AND EXHALES DEEPLY) -Monkey? -(FOOTSTEPS RECEDE) (WHISPERS) Monkey! -(FOOTSTEPS PASS) -Monkey, where are you? (MONKEY WHISPERS) I'm right here. Arghh! Hurry up! Quit messing around. -(SLAP!) -Ahh! (MONKEY CHUCKLES) (SIGHS) Clumsy. -(THUD!) -Hmm? Hmm? MONKEY: Hey, ugly? -(GRUNTS) -(THUD!) (DOOR CLOSES) -(PUNCHES LAND) -(MEN GRUNT) (LOCK CLICKS) (FOOTSTEPS APPROACH) MONKEY: Hey, who are you? Who's there? MONKEY: I was looking for another prisoner. I'm sure there's only one room in this tower. TRIPITAKA: Monkey, is that you? -Where are you? -I'm here. -How? -I used powerful magic. But, monk, he turned you into a girl. I've always been a girl. No, no, no, no. You were a boy monk. Always a girl. I lied to you. I wanted to tell you so many times, but I thought you might feel betrayed. Betrayed? Maybe. Confused? Yes. But nothing else has changed. I need some time to think about this. To get out of my head. Monkey, Davari has... (SPITS) I'll explain later. The Sacred Scroll that he has will give him immortality. And if I don't translate it for him, he will kill one of the captured gods every day. Members of the Resistance are helping us. They have a plan. There's only enough for one of us to make it out. You take it. He needs me alive. I can't leave the gods here. I left you once and I won't do it again. Please. Take it. Go. I'll see what I can do from the inside. (SIGHS) Oh, can you see me? Yes. I'll take care of this. I promise. (GUARD GRUNTS) (FOOTSTEPS) Hah! You still smell the same. -Hey, old man. -Oh. Look at you in the big house. Oh, now, there's no need for this. OK, OK. Monkey. Monkey. Brother. I was the only one who believed in ya. (BOTH GRUNT) Guards! Fight me yourself. Why? I've worked very hard to have guards. Execute him. Oh, cloud not working anymore? Now, you remember the Master's bedroom was at the very top of the castle? Best view. Biggest room. Oh, but there was no hierarchy amongst the gods, was there, Monkey? No reason you were overlooked, treated like you were second-class? You murdered the Master. Oh. Well, you thought about it countless times. I mean, who's worse? That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard anyone say. You are. Oh. Yeah. I guess I am. Kill him. Find him! Or find his stupid body. (GRUNTS) (POIGNANT MUSIC) (POIGNANT MUSIC CONTINUES) (POIGNANT MUSIC CONTINUES) The last piece. Don't stop. Don't ever stop fighting. Silence! (BOTH GRUNT) Hello. What are you doing out here on your own? Guards! (MEN GRUNT) You'll never know what the scroll says. I'll never give you the last page. Um, isn't that it right there on the floor? You can either run for your life or die fighting me for a piece of paper. I'll give you five seconds. Five. Four. Three. Able 2018