EXCITING MUSIC QUIET, MYSTERIOUS MUSIC ALARM CLOCK RINGS ALARM CONTINUES TO RING (Muffled) Ha... Hey... Oh... Eh... Oh? Uh? I'm UP! WHOOSH! Ohh... WOMAN IN DISTANCE: Phillip, it's 7 o'clock. Are you awake? Up - and ready for a new day. Ohh. (Sings) # Oh what a beautiful day! # I can't find my socks! They're in your shoes. Where are my shoes? They're on your feet! Thank you! Bzzzzz. Thank you, Weber. Bzzzz Bzz. Oh. Morning, Weebo. Hi. BEEP BEEP Have you seen today's paper? Oh, yes, I did. If I could solve this metastable compound business, I could save the college. A new energy source would be worth a fortune. Better hurry. The loan's due when the school year ends. Not to worry, Weebo. I'm very close. May I see my schedule, please? FORK RINGS (Sings note) # A-a-a-a... # A-a-a-after school, there's something. I know there is. What is it? This is your complete schedule. Let's see. Unless you didn't tell me something? What is it? There's something there. What is it? Oh! It's something to do with white. What is it? I know it's something important. Oh, come on... I'm sorry. I know it's so frustrating. I wish I could help you. But I can't. Haircut! Ha! (Chuckles) FORK RINGS WOMAN: They can't just close down the school. Outside the Ivy League, name me one private college that isn't in financial trouble. Oh, alright. Name another! (Whispers) You don't think it's too much? No! It's...elegant! It's a wonderful idea to go with the big wedding, this time. It puts the pressure on the Professor to show up. If he forgets this time - that's it. In his case, once is justifiable. Mm-hm. Twice is...understandable. But three times... HORN BEEPS Coming through! Thank you! (Beeps horn) Morning! Or afternoon, whatever the case may be. We have lots to talk about today, so let's not delay. Oh! Thank you, whoever gave me the plate of food and the dead pheasant - which does not count as extra credits. Last time we talked about Newton's Law of Gravitation. To review... This G is like the C in E=MC2. It's a constant. As constant as anything is in the universe. The force of attraction between two bodies is proportionate to the product of their masses, and inversely proportionate to the square of their distance. An example - let's make our naked man M1, and our naked lady M2. According to this formula, their attractive forces would want to close the distance to zero. Why don't they? Hmm? The Earth! So! In essence...that is gravity. And this...is Dr Richards' Life Drawing. Ha! Not my class, is it? JOLLY MUSIC Phillip! Over here! Sara! Oh! Very sorry! Its own momentum... May I sit here? Hello, Sara. What a pleasant surprise. Hello, Ruthie. Martha. Martha what? Martha! Me Martha. You Martha. Me Professor. Yes, I know. I'll just grade my lunch and eat a few tests. How do you hold it in? Like everybody else. Just cross my legs - tight! I was talking about your excitement. Excitement? (Whispers) The wedding. Congratulations! The wedding! Sara and I! I'm looking forward to it, aren't you, honey? It's today. Are you sure? The wedding is today, OK? I believe you. 6:30 at the Presbyterian church on Beech Street. I've been there. We had our rehearsal there last night. Ah! That's right! We did. It went well? Yes, it did. Good. But it doesn't count. No? The wedding counts! And I want you to promise you'll BE THERE! OK? I'd rather die than disappoint you. Well...this is going to be the last time I try to marry you. I imagine so. I KNOW that I love you, but I'm not sure that you can love me. That's ridiculous. I love you with all my heart... With every cell, with every molecule, with every atom. I love you on the subatomic level. Hmm. Prove it to me tonight at 6:30. Prove what, honey? That you love me. 6:30. Good luck. Thank you, Betty. I knew I shouldn't have come, but I'm very crazy about him, you see, Miss Rachael. And this is the God's truth. I want him to have what he wants. Even if it means you instead of me. No! No! You love him. Don't give him up. VACUUM CLEANER STARTS Bzzz. Bzzz. Bzzz. Bzzz. Bzzz. Bzzz. Hey! I'm watching something! Weber! Bzzz. Bzzz. LARRY: Why don't you be quiet! I'm watching TV! Download some manners! ..but he ain't in love with me, Miss Rachael. Huh. Tell me about it. (Brainard whistles 'Get Me to the Church on Time') Hello, Phil. What are you working on? Can't remember? (Laughs) I understand. It's a damn shame they're shutting your college down. I read about it in the paper. It's not over yet. We're doing fine at Rutland. No such financial problems. Hey! You're still working on that lighter-than-air compound? It's a repulsive polymer... Sorry to be rude, Wilson, but I have to go. You don't seem happy to see me. I'm not. All the years we've known each other - studying, working together. What happened between us? I just got tired of you stealing my ideas, Wilson. (Laughs) And what would you have done with them? You would have misplaced them. Forgotten them. Lost them. Undoubtedly you're the brighter one of us. You have a genius for science. It's the science of daily life that eludes you. I've heard that coprocite before. Excuse me, that's very volatile. Yes, I hate you for your brilliance. I'm petty. And corrupt. I probably would have gone mad trying to compete with you in pure thought. I'm not an innovator like you, Phil. I'm an adaptor. And I have profited from your ideas. Why are you here? To be honest, I'm here this weekend to steal your fiancee and make her my wife. Well, I think you'll be sadly disappointed. I'll see you at the wedding then. (Laughs nastily) WEEBO: It's a little crooked... There you go. Weebo, the wedding was not on my schedule. Um, no. Why was that information deleted? Hmm... I don't really know. Do you have another virus? I AM feeling a little feverish. Really? Mm-hmm. You are a little hot. Say "Ah!" Aaaaaaaaah. Aaaaaah. Aaaaaaaaaaah. Ooooooooh!!! YES!!! Hot. Cool. Hot. That's it! The hydrocarbons are inhibiting the Cooper pairs. But go from hot to cold quickly, you get a conductive polymer AND you complete the metastable sphere. Behold! There it is! Now it'll work. Oh, YES! But...what about your wedding? Sorry, Sara. Aha ha ha ha. Should I call the church and tell them you'll be late? MYSTERIOUS MUSIC Right! (Mutters) That's it. Fine. Very good. Ah. The condenser...pressure reactor... Yes! WHIRRING WHIZZ! BUZZ! DING! BANG! Yes! It's ready. Organic catalyst. Positive... ..and the n-n-negative... A little touch of electricity... DOINGGG! PPHHTT! Hmmm. Wow! What a bang! Yeah. A little touch of electricity. Ha ha ha ha! That's not helpful. Ah. Ohhh, boy! This is not good. No, sir! Weebo? What? Get a broom. That'll help. BELLS CHIME ORGAN PLAYS Two years... OW! FAINT GURGLING RUMBLE, HISS Wow! Whooh! Ppz... Ppz ppz. P-P-P-P-P. Ppp! Ppp! (Whistles) Aww! Ahh-choo! Bless you. You have a cold. You should - at 77 degrees kelvin. It's very cold. Come on. Right... Let's try and describe you. You're an elastomer. Yes! You're highly viscous, but yet you can phase-shift. Let's see...you're mouldable. (Beeps) Hee hee hee! (Laughs) It's a little ticklish! Hee hee! (Snarls) Oh! You're foldable. You're gullible. Oh, right, let's see... Wait a minute... OK. And... SQUELCH! You're ductile! Erragh! Erragh! Erragh! Erragh! Oh! You're elastic. Let's just see how elastic you are. BOING! BOING! BOING! I'm the Happy Sack king. Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Bravo! Encore! Oh, boy! Weebo? Yes, sir. Take a picture. OK. Look this way. Smile! Eee - ooo - eee - ooo! Weebo! It's amazing! Miraculous! Excuse me! Professor! It's gone. GLASS BREAKS It is! Oh! No! Professor! I think you gave it a LITTLE too much free will. BOTH: Oh, no! There's not a darned thing to be afraid of. How can anything get in your window? It's closed, OK? CRAAASH! CAT SQUEALS Oh! Ow! Oh! Aargh! GURGLE GURGLE Ooooo! Ow! Ha! Weebo! I got it! Great. Now what are you gonna do with it? It has incredible inertia! Maybe it's just glad to see you. Weebo. Yes. Do you know what this is? Flying rubber? Yes, that's what it is. It's flying rubber. It's FLUBBER! Ouch! * Thank you for waiting so long. Yes, ma'am. I'm sorry, Sara. Are you going to tell me "I told you so"? No. I'm going to give you a ride home. Thank you. There you are. Careful. Watch your gown. OK. Thank you. PROFESSOR: (Muffled) It's perfectly safe, Weebo. It's just an ordinary radioactive isotope that Weber is now removing from the lead containing it. Bzz. Bzz. Very good, Weber. Now, you place the radioactive isotope carefully behind the sliding shutter. The sliding shutter works just like a camera. It regulates gamma radiation. Instead of billions of random particles, you have a precise stream of energy. Now, we carefully place the sliding shutter mechanism underneath the Flubber. And I'm burning up in here! Weebo! Gamma radiation triggers metastable decay in the Flubber itself... Right. ..releasing enormous energy to propel the Flubber. Doing it this way is more scientific than dropping it or kicking it. Or bombarding it with photon light flashes. Absolutely. I believe that by controlling the gamma radiation flux, we can control the movement of the Flubber itself. Cross your fingers, Weebo. Here's hoping! Good luck! GURGLE, GRIND Oh, yes! IT WORKS! Descend gradually. (Laughs) Back up again! Yes! BEEP BEEP My wedding! Gotta go, Weebo! But you haven't finished the experiment. You can't just stop in the middle. The wedding. I can't miss this one, Weebo. I'm aware of the time. Thank you. Your days are wrong. I'm getting married Friday 6:30pm. No! No, you're not. Why not? Because you're not getting married. Yes, I am. You missed the wedding. It's 6:30...in the morning. No. No. Yes. I'm sorry. It is? Yeah. Sara... Sara? You've got a nerve showing your face here after what you did to me last night. Will you please let me explain? No. There's nothing to explain. You weren't there. For the third time, you left me standing at the altar. I'm sorry, with all my heart. But please listen to me, Sara. You know me. You know how I get fixated on an idea. I don't want to hear it! You've got to hear it! Sara! This...is the reason I didn't make it last night. It's Flubber. Flubber. It's a metastable compound, Sara. In layman's terms, if you apply a small amount of energy... ..it liberates an enormous quantity of energy. The effect is transient, Sara. The moment you stop applying energy, it returns to a quasi-plasmoid state. Isn't it remarkable, Sara? What's remarkable, Phillip, is that I ever fell in love with you. You broke my heart. So you could make green goo! Sara, it's much more than that. Flubber could save this college. Let me demonstrate. No, no. Just give me one minute, OK? The Flubber is placed in my back pocket. When I exit this window I will fall. When I hit the ground, the Flubber will send me back up, unharmed. Watch. Ta-ta, my love. Are you nuts? I'll be right back! Hee hee hee! Phillip! Ahhh...! CRUNCH Ouch. Phillip, are you hurt? Just my pride. If you think you'll get my sympathy, you are wasting your time! THUMP! We are finished! BANG! Sara. (Groans) Ooooh! CRASH! Junior's home. Dad! Dad! Dad! Somebody in your organisation screwed up - big-time. I got thrown off the basketball team. I flunked chemistry. I'm on a...academic probation. How did this happen? I'm supposed to get A's. So I was told. The only reason I loaned this jerk-neck college money was so he could get straight 'A's and go to Harvard Business School. This isn't supposed to happen. Yes, sir, we talked to Brainard, the chemistry professor. Now, either he did not understand or he forgot. The boy knew there were persuasion problems, sir. I have a science requirement, you MORONS! Quiet! We'll have to get the 'F' changed to an 'A'. Won't work. This guy - he doesn't live in the real world. He has principles. Get something on him to force him to change the grades. When a man says he has principles, what he means is he can't be bought cheap. MYSTERIOUS MUSIC (Sneezes) BRAINARD: Adding 500 milligrams crystallised Flubber to common hand cream. Stirring in solution. SOLUTION GURGLES Just need one spherical test subject. Perfect. Yeah, now, part two. Applying Flubber in a solution externally to a golf ball. (Whispers) Very good. Evenly over the entire surface... Kinetic test number one. BOING! BOING! BOING! (Laughs) Are you alright? CRASH! Oh. Right. Applying a light coating of Flubber to surface of bowling ball. (Whispers) Alright. Very good. (Groans) My head! That golf ball really moved! How'd he do that? I don't know. Commencing kinetic energy test number two. Controlling horizontal momentum. Commencing now. BANG! Hit the deck! CRASH! HISS! SHATTER! POP! WHOOSH! HISS! (Squeaky voice) This definitely has applications in the field of sports - ho, ho, yes! (Laughs) WHOOSH! POP! What? WHOOSH! POP! Ow! Fluid Flubber. With a convenient spray applicator. It's clogged. Hmm. You seen enough? Plenty. Alright. After the bowling ball hits, break for the car. SQUEAK Oh. You can adjust it. WHOOSH! BOING! Go! BOING! (Both scream) (Both scream) CRASH! (Both groan) (Screams) DAD! * ELECTRICAL BUZZING BRAINARD: Oh! Damn! Oh! (Exclaims) Yes! Weebo! WEEBO: Yes, sir? It's gonna work. (Weebo laughs) I hope so! Now, let me show you how. I connected the accelerator to a sliding shutter. Pressing down on the accelerator releases the gamma rays, and that increases the thrust. Ah, listen to that baby churn. Ha, ha - now! The steering wheel controls lateral motion. If you turn right... OK... ..it'll steer right. Oh! Turns right. Turn the wheel left - steers left. So it functions a lot like a normal automatic shift, with drive, park, neutral, reverse. Yes, yes, yes... See, Weebo? Professor! Help! Let me out! Oh, Weebo! Professor! What were you doing in there? Flirting with the alternator. Hope you didn't touch anything. It's no time to play. We're close to a major breakthrough. I think we're ready. Weebo? Yes, sir? What do you say we take her for a ride? Fly me to the moon! That's it! That's the spirit! We'll fly to Sara's house, park on the roof, and then maybe she's gonna change her tune. Uh...maybe you should go without me. Why? Because I get carsick. You won't blow chips. You don't have a stomach. I have a queasy gyro. Get over it. This is about Sara, not cars. Get in here. No! Now. Alright! CRASH! Fine now. Ha! Ah, out into the world! OK, here we go. Look at this! Let's see what this baby will do. Oh! It works! Yes, it does. I'm flying! Oh, boy, it's true. You know what this means, Weebo? What? I'll never have to buy tyres again! (Laughs) Ah... What's on the radio, Weebo? Ho, Latin! (Sings along) LATIN TUNE ON RADIO Right turn. Whoa - yes! We're flying. Whoa! Oh! It's alright. I saw it. (Laughs) I don't think so. Weebo, there's nothing to worry about - aargh! Help! Ohh! CRASH! Come on, easy. Oh! Sorry. First-time flyer. Shhh! (Screams) DAD! (Honks horn) GEESE HONK Whoa! I'm very sorry! Squawk! Hang on, Weebo! Ah! Ah! AH! Whoa! Ah! Weebo! (Chuckles) Now we're talking! Whoa! (Screams) (Laughs) Oh, yes! Oh, Weebo. Come on out. Please. You've gotta see this. Wow! Is this what you call heaven? Almost. Look at it. Whole world, below and beyond. Oh, it's beautiful. Solitude up here. Stillness. CRUNCH! The silence. Uh-oh. (Screams) Aaargh! Silly me. Turned it off. Turned right back on. Shutter's jammed, probably, Weebo. We're OK! HELP! Start, Brainard! PLEASE turn over! For the love of Newton, turn over! ALARM BUZZES Bale ship! Ohh! Yes! (Chuckles) RELAXING MUSIC It's a pleasure to be with you, not having Brainard hovering above us. Hmm. More wine? No. No, thank you. I have to say goodnight. I have a busy, busy day tomorrow. Rutland would die to have you. We'd be together with nothing but time. Sara... Mmmm... I'm sorry, Wilson. Forget it. It's OK. We have lots of time. Listen, I'm driving up on Thursday to Rutland for the game. I'll see you there. Should I make dinner reservations? Since Rutland IS going to lose, I'll pay. Alright. If your team wins, you buy me dinner. If your team loses, we go to the mountains for the weekend. Mmm. Cad! Do we have a bet? I'll think about it. I can't lose! She's mine. Sir Isaac. CRACK! Ow! BOTTLE SMASHES (Yells) Out! Alright. One more time. What happened? He rubbed cream on a golf ball, then it took off, and... (Clicks) ..popped Smith in the head. Several times. Mm-hmm. I got hit with a bowling ball. Repeatedly. Were you drinking? No. Two beers at dinner. Wesson had a white wine. With dinner. Right. It's the stuff he's got, sir, it's... I don't know what it is. I don't know where it comes from, but... (Sighs) It will give you one heck of a headache. Ah! Goodness. WEEBO: I...wish I could make you feel better. So do I. Maybe I'm old-fashioned, but I believe a woman should love a man for what he is, not for what she wants him to be. Thanks for the sentiment, Weebo, but this is really not an area you're qualified to offer a perspective on. I don't have much of a smile, but I have a brain. I have to deal with this alone. It's a human matter, not for computers. It's for people. Goodnight, Weebo. Goodnight, Professor. GENTLE MUSIC COMPUTER CLICKS SOFTLY MUSIC RISES IN INTENSITY MYSTERIOUS MUSIC Mmm. Hm-mm. Mmm! (Gasps) Got it! Oh, no! I gotta turn this thing off. This is SO embarrassing! Weebo! I just had this amazing dream! Weebo! Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry... Weebo! Weebo. Weebo. Wake up. (Clicks) Mmm. (Yawns) I've solved all my problems! I'm all ears. Flubber is going to the basketball game. Basketball? Yes. * FANFARE Testing, testing. BUSY MUSIC Applying a thin layer of fluid Flubber to synthetic leather surface of basketball. Application complete. Wow! BOING! BOING! BOING! Oops. BOING! BOING! BOING! Two points. BOING! BOING! BOING! Implementing Plan B. Very tight... ..tight... ..careful, careful, careful... Ah. Secondary Flubber experiment. Control elements, bungee cord... BOING! ..3:1 elasticity ratio, 50-pound ballast. Commencing - now. Wish me luck. BOING! Oh, whoa... BOING! Aaahhh! BOING! Oh, yes! BOING! (Yells with exhilaration) I got it! BOING! Whoa! Ow! (Screams) Bungee! Bungee! Help. (Screams) (Screams) (Spits dust) It worked! Yes... End test. MICROPHONE BEEPS BANG! Did you fully fix the Flubber on each tack before we painted? Excuse me, Darth Vader, but what did you say? Was the 15% Flubber solution fixed to each tack before Weber started painting? Yes, I'm positive. Excellent. How long until the paint wears off? 30 minutes. It'd be a little suspicious if the Flubber started working immediately. Uh, isn't this cheating? No, it's not cheating, it's equalising. Our team should have their own telethon. Come on! We've gotta win this game. I've gotta prove to Sara that Flubber works. And I'm gonna do it right under Wilson Croft's nose. Don't fail me. BOING! BOING! Weebo! Yes? While I'm out, you're in charge. OK. No phoning Russia again. I think that was Weber. Make sure the Flubber stays in the tank. Got it. Under no circumstances release it. Of course! You know what'd happen. (Laughs) Do you understand? Yes, sir, I understand. Promise? Have no fear! That's my girl. (Giggles) Go, Medfield! (Laughs) (Slyly) OK! P.A.: Good evening, and welcome to Rutland Arena for the 86th meeting of Rutland Rangers and Medfield Squirrels. Rutland, if they can stay awake, should steamroll the Squirrels here tonight. Alright, Squirrels! Listen up, here, now. OK, Rutland may have us in height and reach, weight and power, agility, speed and talent. They have the advantage on offence, and defence. Sure they're better coached, better trained, and their will to win is unmatched in the conference. They're undefeated in their last 108 games. But that doesn't mean we can't whip these guys, right? WHISTLE BLOWS CROWD ROARS LOUD CHEER BAND PLAYS Ohh! Rutland! Rangers! Rutland! Rangers! OK, Flubber, it's time that you and I got to know each other. CROWD ROARS WHISTLE BLOWS P.A.: Another easy basket for Rutland Rangers. They have built up a commanding lead in the first half. CROWD SHOUTS ABUSE Evening, Sara. Excuse me? What a coincidence! CROWD YELLS EXCITEDLY Stop him! Stop him! (Shouts) Come on, you guys! You gotta do... Not now, Ernie, not now! (Shouts) Go, Medfield! VERY LOUD HORN BLAST Ow! Sorry. Sorry, Wilson. Get me another ten grand on Rutland. You got a problem, Bennet? You're betting AGAINST my team? It's not your team. They threw you off, remember that? CLANG! Ooh, baby! That's gotta hurt! (Yells) Foul! He threw his hip into that! STRANGE SQUEAKS WEEBO: Flubber? Flubber, where are you? Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Rrrrrrr. (Man sings) # Mambo! # RHYTHMIC MAMBO MUSIC FEATURING DRUMS BRASS INSTRUMENTS SQUEAL Go! Yah! Yah! Yah! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! (Sings) # La, la, la, la! # MAMBO MUSIC CONTINUES TRUMPET FLOURISH MARACAS RATTLE DRUMS POUND TRUMPET INTERLUDE MAMBO CONTINUES MUSIC RISES Woo-hoo! Yeah! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE P.A.: Welcome back to Rutland Arena for half number two. The Medfield Squirrels tonight are getting their nuts buried - trailing by 51 at intermission. If Coach Barker has any sense, he has to be thinking... Arggh! Arggh! ..for half number two. PHILLIP: Come on, boys, expect the unexpected. Hey, come on now, son. You can do it. Come on, Bruce. There we go. Be a flying Squirrel! Bart, the impossible's possible. Come on, Laurence. Go, you Squirrels! Show time. * It's... Oh. SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC BALL BOUNCES RAPIDLY Yeah. Defence! Defence! MAN: Come on! Come on, do it! That's pretty good. CHEERLEADERS: Go, Squirrels, go! Ugh! Whoa! (Audience gasps) Oh! Yes! Good shot! We've never... Yeah! Did you see that?! Did you see that, Dad?! Yes! WHISTLE BLOWS MAJESTIC MUSIC What the...? Whoa! SARA: We did it! Whoa! Whoa! Hey! Are you blind? They're doing something illegal out there. Look, the rule book doesn't say anything about jumping too high. Now, sit down! WHISTLE BLOWS Looks like a lonely weekend in the mountains for you, Croft. Come on, Squirrels! WHISTLE BLOWS BALL WHOOSHES Yay! Did you see that, Croft? MUSICAL FLOURISH PLAYER: Dale! Dale! CHEERING Yes! (Chuckles) HORN BLOWS Oh. Dale! Dale! Dale! Not the tacks! I don't know. COACH: This game isn't over yet. Just steal the ball and then score. Pardon me, boys. Educator coming through. Coach, I know very little about basketball, but I do know chemistry. Dale is having a problem - not with motivation, but with adhesive build-up on the bottom of his shoes. Do you have any ethyl alcohol? What?! Excuse me. Hello, Dale. Oh, hello, Professor Brainard. May I see your sole? Wh...? I mean the bottom of your shoe. Oh. The game's not over yet. Keep your chin up, and your energy high. Because you know why, Dale? BOING! SPLAT! Son of a... Get the ball, jump with all your soul. But...but I'm on this end, sir. Jump or I'll flunk you. Oh. What? You heard me. Jump or I'll flunk you out of my department...for good. (Gasps) OK. I think that's a little harsh. JUMP! P.A.: Medfield Squirrels are trying to complete this astonishing comeback. Be patient, Rodney. Plenty of time. Rutland's leading, with the clock winding down. These rodents have fought their little hearts out tonight, but it looks like the Squirrels will come up a few nuts short. Playing 'keep away' are the Rangers... Jump, Dale! Jump! Jepner's soaring into the air and makes the steal. Look at him go! Jepner with wings, soaring to the other end. He's over the bucket, he dives, he's through! And Medfield upsets Rutland! What an incredible play by Dale Jepner! Oh, no! The Squirrels are going nuts! We won! Oh, we did it! Foul! Foul! Since when is it within the rules to accompany the ball through the hoop? I don't know. Come on, I'll buy you dinner. Sara. Goodnight, Phillip. Goodnight. Brainard had something to do with this. It's the same stuff we saw the other night at his house. Right. I don't know how, but I'm absolutely certain that your team cheated. (Scoffs) You're just being a sore loser. Sara. May I speak to you for a moment...alone? What you say to her, you can say to both of us... ..if you can remember. Sara. Flubber. Flubber? It sounds like baby shampoo. Flubber...is what won the game. That amazing aerial ballet was because I flubberised the boys' shoes. A little on the bottom... You are remarkable. Sara. Goodnight, Phillip. Watch yourself. Now, what do we have to do to get you to take a hint? It's over, Phillip. You lost. Go home. Play with your rubber. CAR ENGINE STARTS MYSTERIOUS MUSIC SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC What kind of car does that Brainard fellow drive? Old T-bird. Why? I just saw it. So? It was flying. You heard me. Flying. MELANCHOLY MUSIC WEEBO: Hey, who won? We did. Um...Professor, why the long face? I think you know why. Would it be...a Sara issue? I wish I understood human beings. I wish I understood women. I wish I understood emotions and passions. I wish I understood any of that. If I did, I wouldn't have spent my life in a laboratory trying to figure out HOW the world works. I would've been trying to figure out WHY it works. I know I love her, Weebo. Every neuron in my limbic system is saturated with phenylephrine. That triggers euphoria, elation, exhilaration. The truth is, Weebo... ..I'm not absentminded because I'm selfish, crazy or...or inconsiderate. I'm absentminded because I'm in love with Sara. Professor. That doesn't matter anymore... ..'cause I don't get any more chances with her. No, that's not true. There's always another chance. You never know, right? It's probably just as well it's over. She has to move on. I'm not right for her. But you knew that, didn't you, Weebo? Hmm? You never wanted me to marry her. Hmm. You were right. I wasn't right for her. You're the one for me, Weebo. Just the two of us... and Flubber makes three. Goodnight, Weebo. Goodnight. Oh, oh, Professor... And this is the God's truth. I want him to have what he wants... ..even if it means you instead of me. DRAMATIC MUSIC DOG BARKS CYMBALS CRASH BOING! Ugh! Sara. Sara, it's me. Weebo? May I come in? Oh, I'm sorry to wake you like this, but I can't ring the doorbell. Is everything OK with Phillip? Oh, yeah. It's not a conventional emergency. Oh, Phillip would be very angry if he knew I left... ..but I have to show you something. Do you have a minute? Listen. I know I love her, Weebo. Every neuron in my limbic system is saturated with phenylephrine. That triggers euphoria, elation, exhilaration. The truth is, Weebo... ..I'm not absentminded because I'm selfish, crazy or...or inconsiderate. I'm absentminded because I'm in love with Sara. GENTLE MUSIC And this will be our little secret. (Weebo beeps) * MISCHIEVOUS MUSIC Phillip. GENTLE MUSIC Sara? MUSIC RISES MUSIC BECOMES VIBRANT SARA: This is it. This is the solution. This is how we save the school. That's what I've been saying. Flubber. You saw what it did at the game. Yes. Imagine the line of shoes we could develop. Oh, no, no, Phillip. Not shoes. No. Look. This! Flight! Flight? Yes. Oh! Of course! Air travel. Oh, Sara. Air travel. Yes. Oh. We'd better sell this to a car company. Oh, Phillip. UNEASY MUSIC Hey! HOENICKER: Dr Reynolds. Professor. It's a pleasure to finally meet you. I believe you know my son. He used to play basketball for Medfield. Lovely old car. Mind if I take a look under the hood? Yes, I do! And I don't appreciate you...gentlemen letting yourselves onto my property. I expected something more complex. There's a lot of money in your...discovery. Perhaps we could make a deal. Any discovery I make will belong to Medfield College. At the end of term, there'll be no Medfield College. We'll see about that. You could make a lot of MONEY. If we were interested in making money, we wouldn't have become teachers. You think you can sell it for what you owe me by the end of the term? We will. I'll forget the debt right now. No. I'm not selling. When I leave, I take my offer with me. We understand. Good luck. Come on. Watch your back, smart guy. Bad move, Professor. UNEASY MUSIC PHILLIP: Good morning! Pardon me, Mr Seldon, are you interested in seeing a Phillip Brainard? Who? He's the college professor you spoke to on the 6th, about a brand-new car design. Tell him I'm busy. Thank him for the interest... and send him a hat. He's here. He's right outside. HORN BEEPS FLUBBER CAR ENGINE GURGLES MISCHIEVOUS MUSIC TV: It's one of the rarest watches you could actually own. This watch we have here is called the 'Scarab'. (Yawns) Goodnight, Weber. (Weber beeps then runs down) SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC (Weebo beeps) What?! (Barks) BARKING CONTINUES (Flubber whirrs loudly) DRAMATIC MUSIC (Weebo whirrs) One goon. Two goons. SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC FLUBBER: Ow! TINKLING MUSIC (Taps on tin) BOING! BOING! BOING! Hey. What? I think I found it. You found it alright! Arggh! (Groans) What was that? WEEBO: Take two. (Weebo beeps) (Weebo beeps) (Weebo beeps more loudly) Knock, knock! UNEASY MUSIC BUGLE PLAYS Kiss me, big boy! Did you get it? Yeah. (Flubber groans) PHILLIP: Oh, I've never seen so many zeros! When they saw us flying, they couldn't wait to write the cheque. This will save the school, Phillip. (Laughs) Yes! (Beeps) Weebo? Weebo? SOLEMN MUSIC They took the Flubber. Weebo? ELECTRICAL STATIC FIZZES Weebo! (Gasps) Um...you're leaking battery fluid. Weebo...it's me. Do you have signal? Do you have audio signal? Tracking. It's me, Professor Brainard. Focus, Weebo. Can you see me? She sees me. Weebo...it's alright. I need to get some sort of extension cord, something so I can...recharge her. I've got to download her quick. Weebo. It's alright. It's OK. Weebo. Can you hear me? It's going to be alright. It's like that time you ran into the wall when I first made you. We'll get you upstairs, into AC. She's losing...losing power. It's OK. It's alright. I'm just going to get you to the docking station, till I can make repairs. Weebo. SAD, GENTLE MUSIC Goodbye, my friend. (Mumbles) 'Bye. MELANCHOLY MUSIC * I don't know what to do with her. What happens to the soul of a machine, Sara? Can you fix her? We can make repairs... ..but I can never bring back the life it was she had. That's gone. I never knew what it was to begin with. It was some sort of glorious accident. I kept trying to recreate it, and isolate it, and find out what it was. I never could. What was that...word... ..she was displaying on her screen at the end? Probably a file name. Why was she displaying it? She was damaged, and, you know, downloaded a random piece of information. What was that word? Oh, can you remember? No. (Sighs) Try. I am. It began with 'S'. Hello, Phillip. It's me. Weebo. If I was human, that is. If you're watching this, I'm no longer here. I hope my demise didn't cause you any undue distress. Phillip... ..a full and complete design of me is in this file. You didn't forget it. I never showed it to you. I've made a few changes. I've removed a few of my flaws... ..and added a little of you. I hope that you can love my daughter... ..as much as I loved you. UPLIFTING, EXCITING MUSIC Ooh. Surprise, surprise. Professor Brainard, Dr Reynolds. Good evening. Sit down. You look...er... BENNET: Weary. Yes. Weary. You came to repay your loan? No. I know you didn't. I was just having a little fun. I'm here to sell you the Flubber. Have you been to your house recently? Yes. Do I really need to BUY it? Flubber is a very quixotic substance. It's very difficult to handle. If you try to do anything with it... My man is working on it. It won't be a problem. Well, I can make it a lot easier for you. If you give us a 30-day extension on the loan, I'll tell you everything I know and make you a great deal of Flubber. I'll give you the 30 days, and after that you give me two years. Whatever you come up with over the next two years is mine. That's not fair! BOING! Shop somewhere else, lady. Sara, Sara... I'll do it. May I see the Flubber? Would you like to show these good people to the library? QUIET BEEP ENGINE GROWLS You're going to enjoy this. Professor? I got you a little help. Oh! The lovebirds! Wilson! Shame on you. Welcome. So you finally gave up teaching. How could I pass up the opportunity to transform the energy industry? Flubber. Very interesting, Phil. Too bad it's so unstable. I was just looking over the formula. Dangerous mix. You just have to know how to deal with it. Just a few simple precautions... Hey! Hang on, Einsteen. Stein. Whatever. What's this? Well...it's a hand cream that acts as a separating agent. Right. Um... It's so I can handle the Flubber. It's OK. Thank you. She needs to assist me. Rub it on your hands. Yeah... Whoa! It's a...er... ..squirt gun. (Giggles) What's it for? To lower the temperature of the tank. Let him have it. No, no. Give it to him. No. No, no. Give it to him. Will you...stop that and GIVE it to him?! Put...put it in his hand and GIVE it to him! No, no, no, no, no. Give the gun to him! Oh. Thank you. You're welcome. SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC SOFT GURGLING You OK? GURGLING It's me. (Snorts) There you go. (Purrs) Eeek! Do it for Weebo. (Squeals) Look out! Oooooh... HOENICKER: Get him! Oh, deer! (Squeals) Sara. Going somewhere? Wilson. Ow. Oh. Left, left, right, left. Sara! Grab her. What? Jump! I'm coming, Sara! Oh, yes! SARA: Oooooh! (Screams) (Yells like Tarzan) Hey, Lumpy. Come on. Let's go, smart guy. SPLODGE! BOING! BLOP! Ow. SARA: Phillip, look out! BLEEP! Sara! Get him! This one's for Weebo! Aaaaaaargh! Aaaarrgh! SLOSHING GURGLE! SLOSH! Oh! Oh-oh-oh! Oh! Argh! (Whimpers) Call Mommy. Wow. (Whistles) Ohhh. Hmm. Beautiful. For as much as these two people have finally consented together in holy wedlock and have witnessed the same before God and this company, I pronounce - believe it or not - that they be husband and wife together. You may now kiss the... ..video screen. Oh! Love you, Sara. ORGAN PLAYS 'WEDDING MARCH' I'll meet you at the reception. I'm almost done. It's going to be remarkable. Phillip, please be careful. Don't worry. These chemicals are completely compatible. There's no chance that anything could go wrong. Hey, pal. We're 30,000 feet up in the air. There's no monsters or bad guys way up here, OK? You can look out the window. WEEBETTE: Mom! Mom! Flubber's gone. Get back here! WEEBETTE: When we get to the hotel, I don't care what you say - I'm not sharing a room with him. He's gross! He bounces all the time, he squeaks, he phase-shifts. I mean, he's a quasi-plasmoid! If it's hot in Hawaii, I hope he melts.