Captions by Julie Taylor. Captions were made with the support of NZ On Air. www.able.co.nz Copyright Able 2019 (DRAMATIC, OMINOUS MUSIC) (WOMAN PANTS) (OMINOUS MUSIC SWELLS) (SOFT SYNTH MUSIC) (SOFT SYNTH MUSIC CONTINUES) (SOFT SYNTH MUSIC CONTINUES) (SOFT SYNTH MUSIC CONTINUES) (SOFT SYNTH MUSIC CONTINUES) (BRAKES SCREECH) (LOW, INTRIGUING SYNTH MUSIC) (ROCK MUSIC) (LOW, SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC) Welcome to detention, boys and girls. Officer Pete, will you please escort these... children to the detention room? I'll be joining you shortly. Wanna cuff me, hall cop? (LOCK CLICKS) (DOOR CREAKS) (DOOR OPENS) (DOOR SHUTS LOUDLY) (DOOR CREAKS) (BLOWS) Ugh. (SIGHS) (SIGHS) (DESK SCRAPES) What's the story, gay and whore-y? (GASPS) This is cute. Where'd you get this? Uh, I made it myself. Hmm. (SIGHS) (SNIFFS, SIGHS) Yes, my little Colonel Popcorn. 'Miaow, miaow. I love my mom.' (SIGHS) (SIGHS) (SIGHS) (LOUD THUDDING) (BLOWS) (EXHALES LOUDLY) I got you, Ms Presley. Thank you very much, Jessica. Good morning, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to Saturday detention. (BANGS LOUDLY) As we informed you and your parents, the school is being fumigated for an unfortunate potentially rabid possum infestation, so the district has kindly arranged for us to stay here in what was formerly known as Wayview Prison. Now, it may seem a little worn, a little dark, maybe a little imposing, but it still had that institutional dependability. Rule number one ` there will be no talking. Rule number two ` there will be no leaving of your seat or this holding area without permission from me. And number three ` in accordance to the outreach effort put forth to help those troubled teens with their feelings, due to the unfortunate suicide of your fellow classmate Jenny Duke last spring, you are all going to write an 800-word essay entitled... 'The Me You Don't See'. Let me find out... what really makes you tick. Hand these out, Barrett. Make sure everyone gets one. And rule number four, which is my personal favourite ` all cell phones will be handed to me at this time and returned to the rightful owners at 4 o'clock today. (BANGS DESK) Wake up. Cell phone time. Get them out, everybody. Well, there goes that one. Good luck to you calling your mother, if you have one. Thank you, Jessica. Jesus saves. Thank you, Kevin. Lexi, may I have your phone? BARRETT: Ms Presley? Yes, Barrett. So,... I'm a borderline diabetic. (SIGHS) Oh. And I have this app on my phone to track my blood sugars, so... gonna have to keep it. Huh. Suck on this if you feel a coma coming on. Your phone is mine until 4 o'clock. Now,... number two premium pencils. There is nothing like the smell of this. (INHALES DEEPLY) Don't you love that smell? You know, all I smell is the stink of desperation and... (INHALES SHARPLY, WHISPERS) middle age. Well,... we can talk about the real smell of desperation next Saturday. When you act like a hot ticket, don't be surprised when you get punched. I am right across the hall. All I want to hear is the gentle scrape of pencils on paper. Thank you. I'll be watching you. Closely. (SIGHS) I know you. You never... talk. LOUDLY: Are you deaf? Shut up! Deaf people can't hear you. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) Nope. Ugh. Hello. (GASPS SOFTLY) Whatcha drawin'? Oh, I get it. He's your bae, so he's not allowed to talk to me. Yeah, I get that a lot ` the jealousy thing. But don't worry, honey. Just because he sees what's in the vending machine (SING-SONGY) doesn't mean he's getting any candy. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) You're gross. Whatever. She just gets off on the attention. How do you know what gets me off? (GASPS, SCOFFS) Naughty, naughty. This is a flyer for a drinking party. What do you school-spirit types to do get turnt? Why do you care? Oh, that's right. You probably don't drink. Aren't you training for the Special Olympics or something? The Junior Olympics. Ehh. What's your name again? Barrett. (CHUCKLES) Barrette? Why did your parents name you after a hair clip? Your mouth is so pretty when it's closed. But it can do so many cool things when it's open. (LAUGHS) You know what ` I think we have a big fat faker in our midst. Huh? Maybe she's dead. (SNIFFS) She sure smells like it. Don't poke the weirdo. Just leave her alone. (LAUGHS) Ooh, ooh. Hello? (LAUGHS) (UNSETTLING MUSIC BUILDS) (SCREAMS) Let go of me, you freak. Oh, you're so... (TAYLOR SHOUTS) Don't touch me, you freak! Jesus Christ. (THUD!) Oh! Jesus! Oh, son of a bitch. (GRUNTS) What is going on in here? You're supposed to be writing your essays. I thought I made the rules clear, Alexandra. What? I'm just stretching. Well, you just stretched yourself into another Saturday detention. Ms Presley, I'm starting to think you have a crush on me. You sure like spending time together. I could say the same thing about you. Any more outbursts, and all of you will earn another detention. Is that clear? Yes, ma'am. I gotta take care of this. (SCOFFS) Would you mind not dragging the rest of us into your black hole of juvenile delinquency? I bet some of you would love to be dragged into my black hole. Ooh. You wanna have some fun? Haven't you caused enough damage today? Sit down. If she catches you, the rest of us get it. Wish me luck, Hair Clip. (SYNTH MUSIC) Families love perfect pizza. With more fresh ingredients, our DOM Pizza Checker quality guarantee, and any pizza from $15 delivered, with Domino's, everyone's happy. (SYNTH MUSIC) (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) (IMITATES SMALL EXPLOSION) Boo-whoo! Ah! (LAUGHS) Put it back. (SCOFFS) Hell no. This is mine. You're going to get us all a month of Saturdays. What is that ` some kind of giant glass dildo? (MOUTHS) Shut up. Here she comes. Lexi! There you go. What is going on? What? Don't act coy, sister. I can tell from that little smug smirk on your face that you're up to something. Why, Ms Presley, I have no idea what you're talking about. I have just been working on my essay. I would expect more from an elite athlete. I already finished my paper, Ms Presley. I am superbly disappointed. I'm sorry. You. What do you know? HUSHED: What are you`? Are you kidding me? HISSES: Take it. Take it. Oh! Are you`? Are you`? Really? No, you` Kevin. I assume that you are incapable of lying. So what the hell are these delinquents up to? I, uh` I honestly have no idea, Ms Presley. Um... Do you take me to be a fool? Do you think you can pull one over old Ms Presley? You know, I can read your mind. I can read all of your minds. Old Ms Presley? Listen to me, you little thuglet. (SNIGGERS) I know it's you, and I know that you're up to something no good. I know what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna drag you outside in the hallway and rip each and every one of those disgusting, ridiculous piercings out of your body so that you give up in a blood, snot and tear-filled torrent of shame and regret. (UNSETTLING MUSIC) (CELL PHONE RINGS) Now what the F? I have to take this. Noses in your pages and mouths shut. This isn't over. (EXHALES) (DOOR SHUTS) (LOW, PULSING MUSIC) (PULSING SYNTH MUSIC) MS PRESLEY: (SCREAMS) No, no, no! No! Get away from me! Get away! Oh God! Oh God! No! Open this door! Open this door! (SCREAMS) Let me in. Let me in! No! No! Let me in! Let me in! Looks like we got ourselves a little privacy. (SCREAMS) Open the door. (SCREAMS) (SCREAMS, GROANS) Oh my God! I don't have a death wish! This is beautiful. Get off me! Please, no! (BANGS ON DOOR) Stop! (LOUD THUDDING) Oh God! Oh God! (GRUNTS) (BANGS ON DOOR) It's locked. It's a prison. No amount of karate's gonna open it. What about Presley? (EXHALES) Sweet baby Jesus. I don't do bodily fluids. We have to help her. And what, let the succubus that just turned Presley into a smoothie in? She's got a point. When did you turn team skank? Who says 'skank' any more? I have had about all I can take from you. Bring it. Yeah? Yeah. Fine. Come on. (TAYLOR SHOUTS) I can't hear a thing. Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Is anybody there? Somebody help us, please! Hello? It's dead. (HANDSET CLATTERS) Horribly ironic choice of words. Oh, there's got to be another phone in here somewhere. BARRETT: I'm not dying in detention today. Nobody's dead. Um,... there's pretty compelling evidence to the contrary coming under the door out there. I am going to find a way out. (ALL EXCLAIM) (LOCK CLICKS) Now what are we gonna do? DISEMBODIED VOICE ON PA: Attention students. There is a ghost. There is! No, there's no such thing as ghosts. Oh, yeah? ON PA: Ms Presley is unavoidably detained at this time. A lot of people died here. Bad, bad people. That is not a ghost. That's some nut who also has control over all the doors. Where is that coming from? Maybe it's someone who can help us. LOUDLY: Can you hear us? ON PA: The rules have changed. Not sounding super-helpful. We're locked in the holding room. Please let us out. What do you want from us? Where is she? Where is Ms Presley? ON PA: I am your new principal. (LOCK CLICKS, DOOR BUZZES) What are we supposed to do? I think we're supposed to bounce. Yeah? And get full-scale Presley'd? Well, we can't stay here. (LOCK CLICKS, DOOR BUZZES) She's not there. Let's go. (LOW, PULSING SYNTH MUSIC) (SIGHS) This is not OK. (LOW, PULSING SYNTH MUSIC CONTINUES) Ew. OK. What's the plan? Presley obviously went that way. And that's where our cell phones are. Huh? Oh, hell no. I am not going down the trail of smears. Mm-mm. (DOOR LOCKS) Maybe I am. Uh-huh. Great (!) Come on. What?! What if the killer is in there, waiting with a blowtorch? Don't worry, baby. Mama's got it covered. Ehh. (DRAMATIC SYNTH MUSIC) (INTRIGUING SYNTH MUSIC) (SIGHS) OK. We gotta find the cell phones. Aha! What? (SIGHS) What do we do now? We find a way out. Duh, Jessica. Shears & Secateur Set only 39 dollars Potting Mix just 6 dollars 75 Where you find a competitors lower Potting Mix just 6 dollars 75 Where you find a competitors lower price on the same stocked item, Potting Mix just 6 dollars 75 we'll beat it by 15 percent # BUNNINGS WAREHOUSE # Lowest prices are just the beginning. (UNEASY MUSIC) This place is totally haunted. Ghost! Is out for blood. Don't be ridiculous. There's no such thing as ghosts. (SIGHS) When they saw him walk across the lake, they were terrified. 'It's a ghost,' they cried. But Jesus immediately said, 'Take courage, for it is I. 'Do not be afraid.' There is a ghost. The forgotten prisoner of Wayview Prison. This place used to be a prison... for the criminally insane. I looked it up when I, uh, found out we were having detention here. When they closed this place, one prisoner got left behind. She was locked in solitary confinement. They found her cold, lifeless body weeks later. They say she's still here,... haunting the hall. Thanks for creeping me out even more, freak show (!) Guys, there is no such thing as ghosts. You're right. It's not a ghost. It's Presley. Did you see the blood mile back there? Fake. Presley's dead. She's messing with us. She's a total whack job. This is just the kind of sick, twisted crap that hag would pull to try to freak us out. You... might have a point, Lexi. Mm-hm. Hmm. I do have a point. (SYNTH MUSIC) (DOORKNOB RATTLES) I don't think that's gonna work. They can't all be locked. (DOOR RATTLES) One of them has to be a way out. It's closed. (LOCK CLICKS, DOOR BUZZES) I guess she wants us to go in there. Maybe this is the way. (DOOR CREAKS) After you. (DOOR RATTLES) (DOORS RATTLE) KEVIN: Maybe there's... (LOCK CLICKS, DOOR BUZZES) (DOOR CREAKS) OK, this feels like a set-up. Let's just call her bluff. (DOOR RATTLES) (BOTH GASP) Jesus. Will you put that thing away? You nearly stabbed me. DISEMBODIED VOICE ON PA: Who's going to make it to the end of the deadly detention? OK, Presley. Very funny (!) We know it's you. So come out, come out wherever you are. When I say 'Marco', you say 'Polo', biatch. Marco. TAYLOR: Polo. (GASPS) Taylor. KEVIN: You need Jesus. LEXI: She is in here. We just have to find her. (DRAMATIC SYNTH NOTE) OK. Principal Presley. You got us. You... totally did. You know, if you could just come out, we promise we'll be good kids and we'll sit down and finish our essays, and... and we solemnly swear we will never do anything bad ever again. OK? Just... Just come out. (DOOR CREAKS) (DRAMATIC NOTE) (KISSES BIBLE, EXHALES) (SCREAMS) (SCREAMS, LAUGHS) (DRAMATIC MUSIC) (PULSING MUSIC) (SCREAMS) (WHIMPERS) (SCREAMS) Holy crap. We have to help Presley. (GRUNTS) I don't know. I don't feel a pulse. You're doing it wrong. You have to do it at the neck. No, I think the left wrist will be better. Just go for the left wrist. Are you sure? I don't know. I saw a documentary. Right? No, I'm pretty sure. They were saying how the neck` Do one of you two doctors wanna get down here and do this yourself (?) You? Nah, I'm cool. I'm OK. Yeah, you're good. (GASPS) Check to see if she has a Fitbit. All old people wear Fitbits. It tells you if there's a pulse and how many calories you've burned. Check it! DISEMBODIED VOICE ON PA: Attention students. Please step away from the body. So much for Presley pranking us. We gotta go. (SYNTH MUSIC) Guys, wait, wait, wait. This isn't right. Someone should... say something. Ugh. Me? You knew her best. (SCOFFS) Since when does being most likely to get expelled qualify you to eulogise your dead, bludgeoned principal in the middle of a frickin' meat locker? The Lord will guide you. Come on. I got you. (SIGHS) Fine. Whatever. Oh, wait. Thanks (!) (CLEARS THROAT) OK, here's the thing ` Presley was a piece of crotch rot. I frickin' hated her. And standing over her dead, twisted waste of a middle-aged body... has been my soft wet fantasy for the last three and a half years. But I didn't know it would be so gross, so I am sorry for that. Mostly because I think I'm gonna puke right now. Amen. Ugh. (SIGHS) Look at you being all nice. What? I just` I don't want her to come back and haunt me for that trophy. You know, it's OK if you liked her. (SCOFFS) (SYNTH MUSIC) Which way now, Pocahontas? Um, I think you mean Sacagawea. Pocahontas wasn't a guide; she was actually more of a` (LOCK CLICKS, DOOR BUZZES) Well, answers that. (SCOFFS) Yeah, right (!) And fall right into that trap. No gracias. I'll find my own way. Wait. What? It's not a door to Narnia, honey. I know. It's just... There's something not right about that door. (DOOR RATTLES) (YELLS) (LAUGHS) Oh! Oh, I hate you so hard right now. Punked. (GROANS) Douche. Ow, Jess! Really? I'm just trying to lighten up the mood. Ugh. (DOOR RATTLES, ELECTRICITY CRACKLES) It's even less funny the second time, Barrett. Let's go. Oh, shit. No! Don't touch him! Don't touch him! You're gonna shock yourself. Barrett. Oh! Get his head. Barrett. OK. We have to find a spoon. We have to put it in his mouth so that he doesn't bite down on his tongue. That's for seizures. TAYLOR: Slap his face or something. Barrett! Come on. Kiss him. That's fairy tales. Really, guys? You need to bone up on your basic first aid. It's a reflex. If she kisses him, then he might kiss her back. OK. Oh yeah. He's really comin' round. (MOANS SOFTLY) OK. He's alive. Hi. Hi. What happened? You got shocked by that door. WHISPERS: Oh. Thanks for reviving me. My pleasure. All right. Upsy-daisy. Great (!) I smell like barbecue. Mm. You don't taste like it. All right. Break it up. We are in imminent danger, people. Think it's safe to assume all the wrong doors are booby-trapped. Yeah, duh, cos the forgotten prisoner wants us to follow her evil map. It is not the forgotten prisoner. OK, well, then what the hell is it? DISEMBODIED VOICE ON PA: No one leaves until detention is over. Show yourself, you frickin' coward. That's right (!) Question its moral character. Ghosts really like that (!) It is not a ghost. It is a ghost. I'm kinda leaning towards ghost too. I don't care if it's a ghost. I just wanna get away from you freaks. Hey. Come on, now. No. Bring it in. Bring it in, guys. Get in here. Bring` It's called a huddle. Bring it in. Go around me. Come on. Oh, all right. No. No. OK. Listen, whatever this... this thing is,... we have to ignore it and just keep trying to find a way out. It is just trying to scare us. And we can't let it get the best of us. The more you allow it to freak you out, the less focus you will have to do what you need to do to survive, to win. DISEMBODIED VOICE ON PA: I can hear you. There are no other options. Keep your eyes on the prize. We get out there on that field, and we run that ball, and we are gonna win! That's what we're gonna do. We're gonna win. Ready? On nine. Ready? One, two, three, four, five... Whatever guys. Six,... seven, this is... eight, nine! All right! WHISPERS: The best. All right. Armour. Let's see. Uh... Barrett ` lead pipe, in the kitchen. Huh? Mm? Yeah. This is yours. Let's go. All right. Um... Oh! Sharp and pointy, Lexi. Sounds just like you. All right. And... Ooh! I've got a stake. Let's go, bitches. (UNSETTLING MUSIC) So, uh, how did you get detention? You don't seem like a rule-breaker. Graffiti on the gym wall. Wait, that was you that put 'Jesus ate my homework' in pink and gold sparkle in the gym? What do you think? No! Jesus would've turned in my homework. (CHUCKLES) TAYLOR: Wait, what? You didn't do it? No. Everyone just assumed it was me. Plus, they found the spray paint and the glitter in my locker. Wait, that wasn't yours? No. Well, at least not the spray paint. Besides, I would not waste my glitter on a high school gym wall. OK, girl? Same happened to me. Oh, they found your glitter stash too (?) Cute (!) But no. They found a bottle of vodka in my locker in the locker sweep. Only it wasn't mine. It wasn't even my brand. I wanna know what Miss MVP did to get detention. One day, the volleyball nets were slashed, and someone said I was the last one leaving the gym the night before. I would never damage school property. TAYLOR: That sucks. (LAUGHS) Hey. You're in detention too. What did you do? Someone called me a tranny, and I punched her in the face. So you were framed too, huh? No. I punched her. Come on, guys. (UNSETTLING MUSIC) What's the smell? The funk of 40,000 years. Be careful. It's dark and slippery in here. BARRETT: That's what she said. Shut up, Barrett. Shut up, Barrett. Um, did you Google Maps the spookiest path available? Or was this an accident? I'm confused. I just felt what my senses told me was the right way. Great (!) Now jock girl has spidey senses (!) You wanna lead? You guys, nobody asked me if I wanted to lead. Do you? No. (SOFT RATTLING) Wait. Did you hear that? (SOFT RATTLING) (ALL SCREAM) Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! (ALL SCREAM) (LOW, PULSING MUSIC) Oh my God. (PANTS) (DOOR RATTLES) (LOCK CLICKS, DOOR BUZZES) Go! Go, go, go, go, go! Go! Get in here. Get in. Get in! Shut it. Oh my God. I told you guys ` there is a ghost. (ALL PANT) (AIR HISSES) What is that?! Oh my God. What is that? It's gas. (COUGHS) Try this. (COUGHS) Guys, it's gas. Cover your mouths. Kevin, I need your jacket. Here, here, here, here! (COUGHS) What are you doing? My hat! My hat! Taylor! Thank you. All right. Help her. Come on. I need it. Come on. Go, go, go! You follow me. Come on. (COUGHS) Taylor, come on. (COUGHS) Stay on the poles, guys. The tiles can't hold our weight. Go! Go! Shit. BARRETT: Yo, baby girl. Hey. I was just saying, like, if you wanna attract the ladies, you should dress more sexy. You know? Perhaps better pants or something. Shut up, Barrett. Just trying to help. What's wrong? Are you stuck? I'm fine. Just... Just go. OK. (DRAMATIC, UNSETTLING MUSIC) Whoa! (SCREAMS) (SCREAMS) No! Kevin! (THUD!) (COUGHS, GROANS) (GROANS) (GROANS) Hey. Hey, Jessica. You OK? (GROANS SOFTLY) Where's Taylor? Did she make it? (COUGHS) Barrett. Barrett, are you OK? Hmm? (GROANS SOFTLY) Ow. What the hell happened? What the...? (GROANS) We fell. (EXHALES) Where is everybody? I don't know. (GROANS) What's wrong? Are you OK? Think I just fractured my coccyx. (LAUGHS) Stupid. KEVIN: You OK? JESSICA: (GROANS SOFTLY) Where is Taylor? Did she make it? (GROANS) I don't think so. Where's Lexi and Barrett? I don't know. (BOTH GROAN) Ow. Oh man. (GROANS) (BLOWS) (COUGHS) It's all right. You OK? (COUGHS, GROANS) (GROANS) Ah! (INHALES SHARPLY) My ankle. I think I landed wrong in the fall. (GROANS) Are you OK? Yeah. Think it's just sprained. I'll be OK. (DISTANT CRASH) (FOOTSTEPS APPROACH) (UNSETTLING MUSIC BUILDS) Shit! Ow. (CHUCKLES) No kidding, sis. (SCOFFS) Where have you been hiding this the whole time? Got it from my dad last night. Sharing is caring. Yeah. Yo. (EXHALES) Can I have some? (COUGHS) Be my guest. (GROANS, INHALES SHARPLY) Do you think it'll hurt? Dying. No. Maybe. Got any last wishes? To be really wasted when it happens. (CHUCKLES) Yeah. It's freakin' creepy in here. Here. (EXHALES) Got any last wishes? I just wanna be happy. Don't you? Yes. What have you got to be unhappy about? You have everything. I guess, yeah. I'm loaded, hot... (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) Everybody loves me. Ow. (CHUCKLES) Come on, Kev. We gotta move it. We gotta go. OK, OK, OK. (GROANS) Oh, it's like all that stupid stuff they say on Oprah. Ow! (CHUCKLES) You haven't been looking in the cookie jars. You can't screw your way to nirvana either. (LAUGHS SOFTLY) (PANTS) Maybe not, but it sure is worth a try. (PANTS) Be careful. It's slippery. Yeah. I got it. How you doing, man? OK, OK. Keep going. Don't stop. (DRAMATIC NOTE) (LOW, UNSETTLING MUSIC) Families love perfect pizza. With more fresh ingredients, our DOM Pizza Checker quality guarantee, and any pizza from $15 delivered, with Domino's, everyone's happy. (LIGHTS HUM) Wait! Might be booby-trapped. You` You wanna get out of here, right? Yeah. You're the best. (GRUNTS) Yes! Come on. Damn, girl. (GROANS) (DOOR RATTLES) No! Dead end. No! Oh no! (GROANS) (EXHALES HEAVILY) What is that thing? (SIGHS) Don't worry about it. Scared? Yeah. No. No, I don't get scared. It's weak. It's human. Same thing. (SIGHS) How could I be so stupid? I walked us into a dead end. Ow! All right. Come here. Come here. Come here. Let me see. (SIGHS) Really? (SIGHS) Look, you got a little crazy on you, honey. Don't worry. I got it. Just leave it. We're gonna die in five minutes anyway. So that's it? Just` Just giving up? Do you see any chance of us getting out of here alive? (CHUCKLES DRILY) Well, no. But I still have hope. (SIGHS) Crap. I don't cry either. Well, look at you. You're having all sorts of new experiences today, sports robot. (SIGHS) I can't die yet. And what makes you so special? I haven't made him proud yet. You haven't made who proud of you yet? My dad. Ah. So is that was this... 'be the best' crap is about? OK, look. (SIGHS) I'm assuming that back at that rabid possum infested dump we call high school,... there's a beautiful glass-front trophy case filled... with all the little awards that sporting sportsters just like yourself, win. Right? I'm looking for a response here, honey. SOFTLY: Yeah. And it's also safe to assume... that more than a few of those shiny little chalices and medals have your name on them. Right? And who wins the awards? SOFTLY: The best. I can't hear you. The best. You'd better testify. The best! (CHUCKLES) Listen, you've already been the best. And... you don't have to prove it to any one but yourself now. OK? Thank you. Of course. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) (SIGHS) You wanna do it again? #YOLO. (OMINOUS MUSIC) (DOOR CREAKS) (OMINOUS MUSIC CONTINUES) (DRAMATIC NOTE) (BOTH EXHALE) (GROANS) How's your ankle? I'm OK. (GROANS SOFTLY) Come on. We gotta hurry. (GROANS) Believe me, I'm trying. You gotta run. Come on! (SIGHS) Kevin? Kevin! Kevin? Where'd you go? Kevin! Kev! Oh, you're so frickin' hot. You're so frickin' hot. Oh! Oh, cold, cold, cold, cold, cold. Guys? (GRUNTS) Hello? Barrett? (UNSETTLING MUSIC) (UNSETTLING MUSIC INTENSIFIES) SONG: # I need a hero # Hero! This heart must get to the hospital! I got this! (DYNAMIC MUSIC) I got this. I got this. SONG: # I need a hero # Hero! # I'm holding out for a hero to the end of the night # He's gotta be strong... # GPS: Take the next left. You got this, Katie. # And he's gotta be fresh from the fight... # VOICEOVER: With Holden, you got this. JESSICA: Lexi? Anybody? Hello? Barrett? Guys? You're alive. Oh, I thought I was the only one left. Where's Kevin? One second he was with me, and the next he was gone. Barrett, what is on your face? What? Wait, get it off. Oh, you're so frickin' pretty. It's just lipstick, Barrett. Dude. Be specific. OK? We're in a hell storm right now. DISEMBODIED VOICE ON PA: Please return to the holding area. I cannot believe I'm going to die and the two of you are the last people I'll ever see. (SCOFFS) Way to bring us down, Jessica. Yeah. Way to bring us down, Jessica. It is all your fault. What are you talking about? Do you even care that Kevin's dead? You just ran off to bump uglies or whatever instead of trying to find a way out. And if just for one second you had thought about anything other than getting off, he would still be here. At least Kevin was halfway interesting. As far as I can tell, you're just the champion of whiny and bossy. It's not that I don't care, Jessica; I'm just sorry it wasn't you. Extra cold. BOTH: Shut up, Barrett. Listen up, Proud Mary. I don't make excuses for the way I live my life, but I live it. And if I am gonna kick it in this janky-ass prison, where the smell of piss and desperation are making my eyes water, then the last words out of my smiling lips are going to be 'No regrets'. Can you say the same thing? I'm just going to assume this crazy... is the syphilis talking. What?! You have syphilis?! No, Barrett. Don't go setting your wiener on fire yet. OK? Look, what is bugging you? I feel like neither of you are trying. Is there a way that I'm supposed to act when we are being stalked by a faceless killer? I'm not` DISEMBODIED VOICE ON PA: Please return to the holding area. (GROANS) Shut up! We get it! (EXHALES) Have you guys noticed there aren't any mirrors in this place? Are you kidding me? I mean, I guess suddenly criminals don't care what they look like. Impending doom awaits us around every corner, and all Barrett wants is a facial. Look, if I'm gonna die today, I still wanna go out hot. How can you joke about that right now? I don't want to die. I don't wanna joke about dying. Why are you getting pissed at me? Because, Barrett... Because you're such a piece of nothing. You're like a waste of beautiful space. Shut up, Jessica. Your biggest fear is running out of hair gel. I said shut up. Or not getting enough 'likes' on Instagram. Hey, I said shut up. OK? Stop hating. We all live in our little bubbles. Right? You're the athlete. Kevin was all nerdy for Jesus. I don't know what Taylor was ` maybe that was her thing. You're a slut. Come on, Lexi. You talk like it. You dress like it. I, in fact, have personal experience to back this observation up. Look, somewhere along the way, we all picked a part, and now we're playing 'em. OK? Don't get pissed at me for picking 'popular'. I'm not you, Barrett. Yeah, but deep down, you kinda wanna be. You're a total jerk. Whatever. I don't know why he's such a dick. Haters gonna hate, but Barrett's always great. Jessica,... look, I'm sorry. OK? I didn't` I mean, (CHUCKLES) I've always been a dick. (CHUCKLES) So... at least I'm honest. Right? (CHUCKLES) I mean, I'm sorry. (GLASS CRACKS) (DRAMATIC MUSIC) Barrett. (GLASS SHATTERS) (DRAMATIC SYNTH MUSIC) Oh my God. Oh my God. Barrett! Oh my God. Oh my God. His face. We shouldn't have left him. Barrett. I'm so sorry. (SOBS SOFTLY) He just wanted to die hot. And he looks awful. Ugh. He's gonna be so pissed. He's dead, Lexi. Ghost-pissed, Jessica. I'm not stupid. (SIGHS) We have to find out who's doing this to us. You're right. When we find that a-hole, we're gonna fork... him... up. Damn right. What, are you gonna flip him over when he's done? Slap his face? (SIGHS HEAVILY) No. No. All right. (CLANG!) (ENERGETIC SYNTH MUSIC) (BREATHES RAPIDLY) Be the best! OK. That was good. Um, but a little less cheerleader; a little more assassin. But I really` Like, I felt it was very powerful. Come on. Ew. There's poop everywhere. (SUSPENSEFUL SYNTH MUSIC) (DRAMATIC NOTE) (DRAMATIC NOTE) Kevin. We're gonna get you, psycho. (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC) This prison's only so big. The killer has to be here somewhere. DISEMBODIED VOICE ON PA: Attention, ladies. This is your principal. Where are you, Principal Chicken Snot? Stay close. (SUSPENSEFUL SYNTH MUSIC) ON PA: Congratulations. You are the sole survivors. What do we win ` a plaque or a trophy? ON PA: Look out! (LAUGHS) (LAUGHS MANIACALLY) (SUSPENSEFUL SYNTH MUSIC CONTINUES) (SUSPENSEFUL SYNTH MUSIC CONTINUES) ON PA: This is fun. Aren't we having fun today, ladies? I know I sure am. (UNSETTLING MUSIC) HUSHED: Look. (UNSETTLING MUSIC) HUSHED: Why is there a shrine of Jenny Duke? I don't know. But that's really weird. (DRAMATIC NOTE) (DOOR OPENS, SHUTS, FOOTSTEPS RECEDE) (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC BUILDS) (GRUNTS) (CLANG!) (GRUNTS) (GRUNTS) (CLANG!) (CLANG!) (GRUNTS) (SHOUTS) (WHIMPERS) No! No! Please stop! (GATE CLANGS) (DRAMATIC MUSIC) (ZIP WHIZZES) You? Ugh. Really? The hall cop? You find that amusing? No. I find that incredibly frickin' lame. Shut your slutty little mouth. Suck me, hall cop. (GRUNTS) Hall cop. I'm just some invisible nobody to you people. But I see things. I hear things. I know things. And, young lady, I have got the power now. (SCOFFS) Oh yeah (!) You're a real superhero (!) You know, I made all this happen. Did you know that? This is my impressed face (!) Do you know how hard it is to sneak 50 opossums into a public high school? SOFTLY: Possums. (CHUCKLES) It's pretty ingenious, you have to admit. And that's just the tip of the iceberg. It was me who made sure you all got detention. Yeah. Leave a little clue here, give information to the right people there. And it worked. 'And I would've gotten away with it too if it weren't for you meddling kids.' I made sure all of you narcissistic, hateful brats were under one roof, with no way out and no one else around. Not... a soul. Wanna see? Scream. Go ahead. Scream as loud as you can. ON PA: Scream, slut! ON PA: Jessica! Jessica, where are you? Jessica! Jessica, where are you? (CHUCKLES) Man, I wish I brought some popcorn to this show. (PA MICROPHONE THUDS) She's gone, sweetie. She really lost her head. They're all gone. (INHALES SHARPLY) And you're next. Please. OK. Just... please let me go. I won't tell anybody. Please. Just please let me go, Mr... Hall Cop. You don't know my name, do you? Officer Hall Cop? You've seen me every day for the past four years, and you don't even know my name. I bet you didn't know I have a daughter either. Had... a daughter. You're Jenny's dad. She was beautiful. Smart as a whip and filled with dreams. (EXHALES) She was gonna be an architect. Uh-uh-uh. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) She made me laugh. (LAUGHS SOFTLY) I mean, dang, this girl knew how to tickle my funny bone. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) I can still... hear her voice each night when I go to sleep. 'Night, Daddy.' Sounded like a little bell ringin'. And then she'd sing to me. # After you've gone. # After you've gone away. # But she's gone now. She'll never... go to prom... or graduate or go to college. I know. I know. Must be hard to believe, huh? How could such a smart and pretty girl be the daughter of a lowly hall cop? I told her not to tell anyone I was her dad. I didn't want you wolves making fun of her. It didn't matter. People made fun of her for other things. She wasn't the prettiest. She didn't have as much money. She was shy. She had friends. You wolves ate her alive! You all did ` chewed her up and spit her out! That's not true. All of you jocks and populars and holy-than-thous who think you're so much better then everybody. We didn't hurt Jenny. I never hurt` Don't interrupt me! She was a delicate little flower. And you bullied her. You crushed her. You crushed her until she couldn't take it any more. So she slit her wrists. You might as well have held the razor blade. (BOTH GRUNT) I didn't kill Jenny. Yes, you did. (GRUNTS) You killed her. You're a whore. Yes, and you're gonna pay for what you did to my Jenny. You're gonna pay for what you did to... (GASPS, COUGHS) ...Jenny. (GASPS) Where did you get this? (COUGHS) Where did you get this?! Jenny was my best friend. You're a liar. This is Jenny's locket. You stole it. She gave it to me. I didn't know it was a goodbye gift. You're lying. I would've known. Jenny told me everything. She was always covering bruises. She tried to hide them, but I saw. Shut up. She told me her father had a real temper problem but that she was handling it. You can't turn her against me. You're right. I can't, because she dead. She checked out of Hotel Abusive Father aka her life. I didn't kill Jenny. You did. Shut up. Shut up. Please. Shut up. (GLASS SHATTERS) And with our 'pay it faster' option I'm starting my kitchen renovation. By yourself, unsupervised? I've seen the TV shows. You can do better. With a Gem personal loan you could get someone to do up your kitchen. And with our 'pay it faster' option you could save up to $1,000 in interest just by paying an extra $50 a month. Yeah, course. I just really wanna knock out a wall first. You can do better with Gem, powered by Latitude. Lexi, wake up. Wake up, honey. (COUGHS) There you are. Good. Never thought I'd say this, but I am so happy to see` (SCREAMS) Zombie Presley! No! No! Get off me, you bitch! No! Ow! I'm here! I'm alive! Lexi, look at me. I'm alive. I am alive. I am here. I'm alive. Presley? Yes. Yes. OK? OK, but there was a lot of blood, and you... you looked like hell. Yeah, but I don't go down that easy. OK? Here. Let me help you up. Here we go. Upsy-daisy. You promise you're not a zombie. I promise I'm not a zombie. (GROANS) 100% human. OK. There you go. (SIGHS) Oh! Thanks for leaving behind the trophy. Came in handy. I don't understand. Was this all a joke? No, honey. It wasn't a joke. Assembly's gonna be really depressing Monday morning. (SIGHS) What do we do? Well, I always like to start with the good news and I transition into the bad. Oh, and there's a pep rally Wednesday, which is really gonna pump up everyone` No, Presley. About him. Leave it there. Someone always picks up the trash eventually. (LOCK CLICKS, DOOR BUZZES) I'll take this. Hey, I'm sorry I called you crotch rot. What? Nothing. OK. Ooh, watch your step. What about everybody else? Well, considering OP did such a bang-up job of offing me, I took the liberty of checking a couple of pulses. I'm not saying they're going to look cute come picture day, but they won't look dead. How about that? I saved us all. I thought I saved us all. Yeah, well, you also think that dress goes with those pumps, but we all make mistakes. Ah, I see. So we're back to the game already. Mutual respect is so boring. Do that again and you can join your little friends on their ride to the ER. (SCOFFS) I'm assuming that surviving multiple murder attempts gives me a pass on those extra Saturdays, right? Try coming back from the dead and we can talk about it. Do you know what's weird? I'm actually glad those guys are all right. They're cool, I guess. Plus, I'm all out of good eulogy material. (BOTH CONTINUE SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY) Captions by Julie Taylor. Captions were made with the support of NZ On Air. www.able.co.nz Copyright Able 2019