# Lean your ear this way # Don't you tell a single soul # What I'm going to say # Christmas Eve is coming soon # Now, my dear old man # Whisper what you'll bring to me # Tell me if you can # Johnny wants a pair of skates # Suzie wants a sled # Nelly wants a picture book # Yellow, blue, and red # Now, I think I'll leave to you # What to give the rest # Choose for me, dear Santa Claus... # It's my turn next. OK. Remember to speak nice and loud. Santa's old. He doesn't hear as well as he used to. OK, little girl. Your turn to see Santa. OK. That's her right there. # All the stockings # You will find hanging in a row # So, what did you ask Santa for? I can't tell you! Oh, there it is! Oh, but, honey, you just saw Santa. You're gonna mail him a letter now? Just covering all my bases. Besides, I don't even think that WAS the real Santa. Of course it was the real Santa. So the real Santa smells like cigarettes and beer? W-well... He said you were pretty and asked for your number. You didn't give it to him, did you? Mom, please. You can do SO much better than that. Hey! Hey, hey, hey. You don't have a stamp on it, Hope. Tell you what. You give it to me and I will mail it from my office, I promise. Nope. This is the magic mailbox to the North Pole. You don't need stamps! Well, why don't you just - OK. There. Now let's go and get some ice cream. (SIGHS) Fantastic. (HUMMING) # Aura Lea, Aura Lea # Maid of golden hair # Sunshine came along with thee # And swallows in the air... Mmm! # Take my heart, take my ring # I give my all to thee # Take me for eternity # Dearest Aura Lea - # (KNOCKING AT DOOR) (KNOCKING) Coming! # De-dah-da-dah-da-da-da... # More letters! Oh... Last batch of the season! Anika. What are you singing? Oh, just a little ditty that Kris picked up 150 years ago. Kind of became our song. Big night planned, huh? I hope so. Wow! That ruby necklace is a real beauty. Oh, thank you. It was my wedding gift from Kris. He found it on a mountaintop one Christmas Eve. And he said it was shining like the north star in the moonlight. He was so romantic. That was many years ago. But I thought if I wore it, he might remember what he said to me, about how we had the rest of eternity to fall deeper in love with... (SNIFFS) Did you make your famous meatballs and dumplings? Oh, yes, I did. Oh, well... Forget Kris. I think I'M in love with you! (CHUCKLES) You're such a dear. Why all the fuss? Well... Tonight is a special night. And to be honest, things haven't been that great between us recently. Well, it's such a busy time right now. Something's been missing for a while now. I know it sounds silly. I guess I just want to feel loved again. Do you know how long it's been since he held my hand? Oh, Mrs C, every relationship goes through its...rough patches. You know, there was a time that he couldn't stay away from my dumplings. And now he barely touches them. I'm just hoping tonight he has more of an appetite, and afterwards, I can rub his big belly and - La-la-la! La! La-la-la. OK! Great talking to you! You too, dear. Bye! Bye. Oh! Boss. Good luck! You're gonna need it. Sorry I'm late. Things are crackers down at the workshop. Something smells good! I'll go and wash up. OK. Hurry back. (SIGHS) Kris! Your dinner's getting cold! Kris, sweetheart? Dinner's on the table. Kris? (SNORES) Happy 500th anniversary. "Dear Santa, "I want a real BB gun so I can help my dad kill those dirty squirrels in my back yard." (SIGHS) Oh, I'm going to need more red ink! Now,... Ooh! This one's addressed to me. "Dear Mrs Claus, I usually write to Santa, But this year I am writing to you, because..." Well, I don't want any toys or games. All I want is for my mom to fall in love and find a new husband. She tells me that she's not lonely but sometimes... when she thinks I'm not watching, I... I see her cry. Please help her find someone special so that she can be happy forever, like you and Santa. Thank you and Merry Christmas. Love, Hope Jenkins. PS: here's a picture of me. My mom's name is Noelle. In French, that means Christmas. And she works at the Cascades Casino." OK... All right. Maria's gonna read you a story after I leave, but don't stay up too late, OK? I know. So you're really not going to tell me what you asked Santa for? Nope. No? You know we can't have a dog here, right? Yeah, I know, not until we move into our new apartment. And you know that Santa can't afford a lot this year, right? I know all about the global economic downturn. Besides, what I asked for doesn't cost money. Did you ask him to make it snow on the strip? Course not! Wait. We ARE gonna have snow at grandma and grandpa's place in Colorado, right? Definitely. So we can make, like, snowmen and snow angels and-and go sledding? Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yay! (GLASS BREAKS, DOG BARKS, ANGRY VOICES) They're at it again. Yup. He didn't like her burnt banana bread, And she said, "What if there's something wrong with the oven?" Then he said, "Why don't you go stick your head in there and check it out?" OK. I've gotta get us out of here. Hey, Myles. Hey! I got a fresh pot brewing. Just give me a minute. Ooh. You're looking a little rough. Another hard day's night? It's Vegas. Are there any other kind? That's the difference between you and me. You actually get lucky and I spend my nights falling asleep to late night reruns. How do you know I got lucky? The...lipstick on your neck, for starters. OK. Let me. If you've got it anywhere else, You're on your own. Not likely. Really? What happened? You know, I don't know. Just not into it. Guess it's the holidays. You OK? Want me to call a doctor? I mean, I can get a doctor for you. Yeah, OK. Maybe you should tell her to go easy on the trampy tangerine next time. Yeah, I'll do that. Wait! That's right. There won't be a next time. That's not fair. How is that not fair? Every time I see you, you're with a different girl. I didn't know you were keeping tabs. Tabs? I can't even count that high. (CHUCKLES) Someone's in a good mood for working graveyard. Yeah, two more nights and then Hope and I are off to Colorado. Nice. What about you? You have any holiday plans? No. I'm stickin' around here. Hoping one of our regular singers indulges in a little too much holiday cheer and I get the chance to sub in. Fingers crossed. Thank you. (DOOR OPENS) (CLEARS THROAT) Oh! Mrs C! What a nice surprise. Calvin, I need the reindeer. Um... But they're just resting for their big night. I promise, you'll just drop me off and bring them right back. Um...Mrs C, you're kinda putting me in a tough position here because I'm still on probation for the reindeer racetrack, And the whole bookie thing. Well, you're already shovelling out the stables. I mean, how much worse could things get? That is a...a really good point. Where you do you have to go in such a big hurry? It's a little town called Las Ve-goss. Oh! Las Vegas? Why-why-why- why do you need to go there? Someone there needs me, and I'm going to try to make a difference. W-what does the big guy think? He doesn't know, And that's the way that it's going to stay. I doubt he'll even notice that I'm gone. Hitch up the team. I don't have much time. Um... Mrs C, I really don't think that you can go to Vegas looking like that. What's wrong with the way I look? Just trust me on this one. I just have to... A little magic sparkle-dust can go a long way. How do you think Santa gets his big butt down all those chimneys? Calvin! I don't know. Maybe just a smidgen. Careful! ELECTRONIC DANCE MUSIC RECORD SCRATCHES Whoa! Oh, dear. Thank you. I don't know how to walk in these strange shoes. I'm usually wearing Mukluks. WONDROUS MUSIC Thank you very much. Good morning and welcome to The Cascades. Do you have a reservation today? Well, actually, I guess I am beginning to have a few. No, I mean for a room. Oh, no, I'm sorry, I don't. Oh, you're in luck. We just had a cancellation. What's your name? Jessica. Jessica... Hello, Jessica. I'm also going to need your last name. Oh, Cla- Buffet. Claubuffet. Jessica Claubuffet. It's French. Is that with a C or a K? Yes. There is no reason to just give up and abandon all personal hygiene. I'm sure she'll be back soon. What if she's left me for good? I can't believe I forgot our anniversary. She went and made a beautiful romantic dinner, and I just fell asleep. Don't take it so hard. You're working round the clock this time of year. How could I be such a dummy? Try not to worry. I'm sure she'll be back soon. Yikes! Look at the time! I need you down in that workshop ASAP! I don't think so. What? That's not an option. Sir. Now, you drink this cocoa, you get yourself cleaned up, and you meet me in that workshop in 30 minutes. (SIGHS) Ugh! This isn't how Mrs Claus makes cocoa. There. Want a little more? Yeah. Yeah? Are you the keeper of the castle? Um...I'm the concierge. And your name is Noelle? Yep. Why, you're exactly the person I'm looking for! Oh. Oh, but is that a wedding ring? Are you already married? No, no, no. It's a... it's a fake, but it fends off the creeps. Oh, thank goodness! I thought I had the wrong person. Is there something that I can do for you? Well, I hope so. You see, I'm here to meet men. Ah! Well, good for you. Well, actually, just one. That's all you need, right? That's what they say, yeah. I was just wanting to know what you looked for in a suitor. Me? I was very curious as to know what qualities are important to YOU, in a man. Noelle? Can you come see me when you...uh...have a minute? Of course. I'm sorry, that was my boss. Um... Might we be able to converse again later on? Absolutely, and I would be happy to direct you towards some hot singles spots. Oh. I like it a little chilly. I will see what I can do for you. Thank you. Adieu for now! What can I do for you, sir? Who was that you were talking to? Oh, just another woman hoping to find her Prince Charming. Did you see the size of that rock around her neck? She must come from serious money. Well, she seemed very sweet, sir. She looked pretty sweet, too. So, your Santa-suit idea seems to be a real big hit. The guests are really playing along. You prime the pump with a little free play, And next thing you know, the suckers are lining up at the ATMs. Um... Speaking of money, it's December 20th. Do you think I might be seeing my Christmas bonus, you know, sometime before Christmas? What's the big hurry? I need it for a first and last on a new apartment I've just found. Congratulations! Thank you. You've finally dug yourself out of that hole your ex left you in. (KNOCKING) Yeah. Got a minute? Sure. Sir, uh... Hey, try and get me that name of that hottie you were talking to. Yes, sir. That steps keeps - Can we fix that, please? Yes, sir. What is it, Evan? Our guy struck again. Damn it! What did he get this time? Emerald bracelet. The poor woman doesn't even know when or how it left her wrist. Whoever this guy is, he must have lightning-fast fingers. You want me to contact the Las Vegas PD? No, let's solve this internally. We don't want any bad publicity during the holidays. OK, boss. I'll take care of it. He's just sitting there, like a pet rock! We are falling behind schedule. I need you to tell me where she went. I told you. It's a secret! You don't get it! He can't function without her, and I am worried that if she doesn't come back soon, there isn't going to be a Christmas this year! I'm worried about what he'll do to me when he finds out I helped his wife skip town! You did what?! Where did she go, Calvin? She made me promise. Calvin? Um... She went to Las Vegas. Las Vegas? Wh...What's in Las Vegas? What's in Las Vegas?! One-armed bandits, beautiful showgirls, free drinks... It's the party capital of the world! Shh! That doesn't sound like her. Why would she go there? Calvin... How would you like to clean up Dancer's doo-doo for the rest of your life, hm? She said something about wanting to feel loved and appreciated. I... Oh, this is a disaster. Hitch up the team. I'm going to Las Vegas. Sir! No! That is a bad idea! You can't leave! If you do, Christmas will be in jeopardy. No, Anika. Without my Jessica... there is no Christmas. Hitch up the team. Oh! And would you like some company on that trip to Las Vegas? I could be very useful. Extra set of eyes might find Mrs Claus just that much faster. You might be right. Yes! Now, you listen to me! You stay out of trouble. You help him find Mrs C and then you bring them both back home. You got that? You have the cutest dimple when you're bossy. Not the time, Calvin! OK. O-kay. Now, keep this on at all times. You've got 24 hours, tops. If it takes any longer than that, I fear for the children of the kingdom of Tonga. Hmm? It's Santa's first stop every year, you nincompoop! Oh... I knew that. You are so full of reindeer pellets, Calvin! (SLEIGH BELLS JINGLING) Would you look at that? Isn't it beautiful? Blitzen, take us to the hotel where you took Mrs Claus. Can't believe I get to spend some time in Vegas! I just hope it doesn't take too long to find her. Oh, that's exactly what I was thinking, sir. I don't understand why I had to cut my hair and shave off 300 years of beard. That's the new you! Yeah, but what about these clothes? Why can't I wear my own clothes? Because you're a rock star! You gotta be incognito, or you'll get mobbed and then we'll never find Mrs C. OK. Hello! I was wondering if you could tell me if someone named Jessica Claus is staying here? She's the love of my life. I'm sure she is, but that's against our policy. Will you be checking in today? Uh... I believe so. I don't suppose you could... hook me up with a room upgrade? Yeah. I, uh... think we can make that happen. You gotta grease the wheels if you want them to go round. Know what I mean? OK. Here we go. How do you spell your name? Oh, it's K-R-I-S, last name Claus. C-L-A-U-S. That's funny, I get it, But I will need your real name to check your reservation. Oh, and if you want the free buffet, you'll have to wear a Santa suit. I'm sorry, I left mine at the North Pole. Oh, that's too bad. But seriously, I don't have a reservation for a Kris Claus, and unfortunately we are booked solid through the holidays. OK. Excuse me. I don't think you know who this man is, but he is the world's most famous toymaker and distributor. Uh, excuse me... Hi. My name is Duncan Kirby. I'm the casino manager. How can I help you? Me and the boss need a room. That shouldn't be a problem. Oh, look...at that. Something just popped up! Oh! Huh! Yeah. We've got a high-roller suite available. Complimentary, of course. Wow! High-roller suite? Yeah. Sounds like it'll work. Perfect! And...perfect. Just this way. Where did all of that money come from? Stocking stuffer room. The st- that money is for the children! Oh, don't worry. We'll make it back at the tables. Where are you gentlemen from? Way up north. Mm. Canada? Ah, further than that. Wait till you see the women in the high-limit lounge. Trust me. And, gentlemen, if you do need a line of credit, I'd be happy to set that up for you. Here we are. Do you know that you were always on the "naughty" list as a little boy? (CHUCKLES) Well, I guess some things never change. After you. And... Voila. I'll arrange for a personal concierge to be at your disposal, 24-7. Anything you need, just let us know. Oh, well, can you help me find Mrs Claus? This is Vegas! There's a Mrs Claus around every corner. I'm sorry. I'm afraid I don't follow. Look at this place! I think you're really gonna enjoy it here. Good luck at the tables. Uh...hold on a second. I got this. Oh. Thank you. What was that for? You gotta grease the wheels if you want 'em to go round. You know when you need a little extra from the reindeer, you give 'em one of Mrs Claus's special cookies? Yeah. Yeah. It's like that around here. Now what are you doing? We don't want to be rude, not enjoy the milk and cookies. OK, look, Calvin, I want to go find Mrs Claus, OK? OK. OK, just let me wet my whistle. (CHOKES) Oh, it's bubbly! She could be anywhere out there. Where do you think we should start? Well, let's start at the slots and then make our way to the tables. Well, look who it is! My favourite customer. Hi, Myles. Mom's having an "important" conversation with Duncan. This is my lucky day. A Shirley Temple, or something a little stronger? Stronger. Think I just bombed my spelling test. Oh! No way. Did you know that weird is spelled W-E-I and not W-I-E? Yeah, I think I knew that. Well, I didn't! Don't make me learn rules like "I before E except after C" If it's not going to hold up when it counts. OK, all right, say no more. One Roy Rogers, coming up, OK? Enemy at the gate! Stay here until the coast is clear. Hey. How's it going? Good day. Kind sir? I just - Hey, can we have another round? ...flew in yesterday and - I'll just be with you in one second. Barkeeper? Surely. Trouble at the tables? Well, hello there! Oh, I just love serendipity. I don't know that game. Craps offers the best odds in the house. Craps? If that's not your thing, blackjack's good, too, But stay away from Ricardo. He's been dealing himself nothing but 21s all week. I put in for time off three months ago! And I promised my daughter she'd finally see snow. Hey, no-one makes people happier than you, and happy people spend money. OK, do me this little favour, I'll double your Christmas bonus. So, what, I'm supposed to spend Christmas in a casino? OK, I'll make it easy for you. I'll set you up in a suite right across the hall from your client. What about Hope? She practically lives here anyway! OK, but I will not miss her Christmas concert tomorrow night. Done. This guy came in here with a sackful of cash. I need you to make sure it stays here. Thanks. This is wonderful. I'd like to go "all in" now. Oh, no, no, no! You can't do that. You have to keep a poker face. Poker face? What's that? Watch me. Hm! Now you try. No? Maybe poker's not your game. But you're naturally lucky. If I were you, I'd go to that roulette table and throw some dough down on red. Red is definitely your colour. Cookie dough? Dough. Yeah, I'd listen to her. She knows what she's talking about. Maybe you're right. Wish me luck. Good luck. Oh, wait! That's that's my - Givin' away my tips! Come on, bunny, it's time to go. One sec! I just need to finish my cocktail first. MOCKtail. Cola and grenadine with extra cherries. We had a rough day. Mm. Join the club. You look like you could use a drink. Yeah. I am seriously At the end of my rope here. I mean, with work, the trailer park, the holidays... Well, you know what they say. When you're at the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. That's Ashley! I gotta talk to her about the Pittsburgh-Cinci game on Sunday! OK, but stay close. OK. Yeah. I got it! Hey, Ashley. Wait up! I am a terrible mother. Oh, come on! Hope's a great kid. She's lucky to have you as a mom. Yeah, well, she's gonna hate me now. I have to work over the holidays and ruin her Christmas. Ouch. Could you do me a favour? Try to find out what she asked Santa for? Will do. Can I have my check, please? Yeah. Sure. Just charge it to room 1503. It has an amazing view... You should come check it out. She's got an amazing view, so... Act normal! The heat is on my tail. Hey, Evan. If I can get her through grade school without a rap sheet, I will be mother of the year. Portable BBQ only one hundred and thirty-nine dollars going to be with family. It's really about just sitting together, enjoying the deliciousness that occurs on Christmas day. By dinner time we're very very full. Loosening and notching our belt. Portable BBQ only one hundred and thirty-nine dollars 52L Wheeled Hard Cooler just one hundred and twenty-nine dollars Where you find a competitor's lower price on the same stocked item, we'll beat it by 15 percent. # BUNNINGS WAREHOUSE # You can put a little magic under the tree for everyone this Christmas Any luck yet? Uh...nope. Not yet. My new friend, Ricardo here keeps pulling 21s. I'm talking about finding Mrs C. Oh, that. Uh, no. Listen to me. Christmas Eve is 52 hours and 14 minutes away, and we are going to have an elfin mutiny on our hands if you don't get Santa back here, ASAP. (IMITATES STATIC) What? I can't... shh-kk- What? What's that? I couldn't make... Can you hear me? Calvin? It's my... Mom. She's crazy. What're you gonna -? I can't find her anywhere. What are you wearing now? Oh? You like it? Just trying to blend in a little. I don't see what any of this has to do with finding Mrs Claus. I think if we stay in one place for a little while, we have a better chance of spotting her. See you in a bit. Mr C! Oh. I gotta go. Hey. You sure you don't want to go to grandma and grandpa's on your own? Your cousins will be there. I don't want YOU to be alone on Christmas. You are so sweet. It's nice... It just doesn't feel very Christmas-y in here. Well, then, we'll get a tree and decorations. How about that? Yeah? OK. Do you want to stay here and watch a movie, Or come to my desk and draw pictures? Is Myles still working? You know, um... I don't know. You like him, huh? Of course. What am I saying? All the girls like Myles! Can I have an elf kiss? You're a good girl. So, who here is single and looking for love? ALL: Yeah! Me! I am! Wonderful! So, tonight, I'm having a party in my room. Room 1512, 10 o'clock sharp. It promises to be a sparkling affair! See you there! Bring your smiles! How is everything? Are you enjoying the food I sent up? Yes, it's wonderful. Thank you! You're welcome. May I ask you what kind of business you're in, Mr Claus? Oh! I wouldn't exactly call it a business. You see, every year at Christmas, I travel the world, bringing joy to millions - Toys! He's in toys. Toys? Wow! This must be a very busy time of year for you. Oh, ho, ho! The busiest. Is there anything I can get for you? Show tickets? Dinner reservations? Oh, thank you. No. I'm just here trying to find my wife, So that's...uh...pretty much all I'm thinkin' about. Ah. I see. Well, if there's anything I can - Wow! This is delicious. What is this I'm eating? Uh... Let's take a look. That is our wild game plate. Let's see. We have... bison, wild boar... And that there is venison. Venison? Deer meat. Oh! (GAGGING) Uh... Mr Claus, I'm staying in the room across the hall. If you need anything, please let me know. OK. And good luck finding your wife. Thank you. Urgh! It's all over my clothes! Oh, pardon me. I guess now's the right time to grease the wheel? Thank you, Mr Claus. That's very generous. What if that was Rudolph's cousin? Hey, Jessica! How'd you do at roulette? Oh, Hope, you were so right. Red IS my colour. I knew you were a lucky lady the minute we met. Be careful. Cos one day you're up, and the next day, you're out on the street corner carrying a big cardboard sign. Two Virgin Peppermintinis, on the house. Why, thank you! Myles wants to be a famous singer. That's the plan. Sounds like a good one. By the way... thanks for the loan. Thank you. So what's the problem? You seem a little sad for someone who's been beating the house. Um...to be honest, I guess I am. You see, someone I love very much barely notices me any more, and I just wish, more than anything, that he would open his heart and look me in the eyes and tell me that he still loves me. You know what I mean? Kinda. Silly me. What about you? Are you excited for Christmas? Yeah, except for... I'm pretty nervous about tomorrow night. How come? It's the holiday pageant at my school, and I have to sing a Christmas song. But that sounds like so much fun! Well, not really. It's actually pretty scary. But Christmas is still my favourite holiday. People really appreciate each other at Christmas time. Hey! Psst! Come on, Aunt Jessica! Come on, Auntie! Let me show you around. Thank you. Actually, Myles... I'm having a little party in my hotel room tonight, And I was wondering if you could bartend? Yeah. I could do that for you. Great! Starts around 10. I know it's kinda late. This is Vegas, that's early. Mm! Noelle! Noelle? Hi, Noelle! Remember me, Jessica? Of course. How is everything? Are you enjoying yourself so far? Oh, I certainly am. Would you like to sit and partake with me? You know what? I can't, I'm still on the clock. Oh. Well, would it be all right if I accompanied you just for a minute? Of course! Great! Myles, can you please save all of these for me? Yeah! No, they'll be under my protection. Thanks! So where are we going? Uh... Well, the...lobby. Oh! What is a lobby? So let's talk about men. I'm still curious to hear what qualities your ideal suitor would have. You're asking the wrong person. I really don't date that much. Oh, why not? Let's just say I've had some bad experiences in the past, and I'm not too anxious to repeat them. Oh, everyone makes mistakes! That's why they put erasers on pencils. I'll have to remember that one. So tell me about your ideal man. I don't know what you want me to say. It's not like I have some sort of list prepared. Well, just try. If you had your wish, what type of gentleman would be courting you? OK. Um, well... He's gotta be able to make me laugh. And he's got to have a good heart. And he's got to know the difference between a flat-head and a Phillips screwdriver. And I'd like to find someone who still sees a shooting star and thinks he can make a wish. Oh, that's nice. What else? He's got to see Hope as the best part of the package, and not the baggage, you know? And most importantly, Hope's got to like him, too. Well, I can see that you haven't put any thought into this at all (!) Christmas is a magical time. Maybe you'll meet him soon. Maybe. I've got to get back to work now. Oh. OK. Toodle-oo! (BEEPS AND WHIRRS) Whoo! Hah! Did you see how much I won! I don't see her anywhere. You know what? I'm gonna check the lobby again. (COMMUNICATOR PLAYS JINGLE BELLS) ANIKA: Please tell me you've found her. Not yet. We're still looking everywhere. You're going to ruin Christmas! You know that, right? You do realise I can see you? Well, now you see me - Calvin! Now you don't. Talk to me. We've been reviewing security footage and we've noticed something suspicious. What is it? All the women had interaction With one particular man during their stay. Oh? Randy, the bell-hop. We gotta keep an eye on that kid. Have you done a security check? He's clean. No priors. Not even a ticket for jaywalking. Well, keep at it, I have full confidence you'll be able to find the culprit. Thank you, sir. She's not in the lobby. You know what we haven't tried yet? Baccarat! Calvin, I have to be honest with you. I've known Mrs Claus for 500 years. I just don't think she's into all of this gambling. All right, baby! Mama needs a new pair of Mukluks! Jess? Is that my Jessica? Oh! This is more fun than reindeer games! Oh, thank Christmas! It's really her! If I roll a hard eight on this one, all of you single men must come to my room for a party tonight! (MEN CHEERING) (ALL CHEER) Maybe it's not as bad as it looks. Everybody, come to my room! Claubuffet. That's the name. Wait! Hold on, boss! Oh, dear. Have I done something wrong? No. No, no. Not at all. I just wanted to make sure that you were being well taken care of. Please. Oh, yes, everyone has been so agreeable. Well, I'm glad to hear that. And you are in Vegas by yourself, aren't you? Yes. But I swear, it feels as if I haven't been alone even for a minute. Well, you're a beautiful woman. I'm not surprised. Here you go. Wow. Would you... Ahh. You have a gorgeous neckline. Do you have dinner plans tonight? No, I don't. Well, perhaps you would allow me to escort you to one of our finest restaurants? Why, I haven't been asked to dinner in... ..ages. Yes. That would be lovely. Thank you. By the way, how are you with tools? (COUGHS) Um... Let's just say I...know my way around the tool shed. Excellent. So would you like to come to my room after dinner for a little get-together? Rawr! You're a naughty girl, aren't you? Naughty? No, never. Huh? No. Never. Whatever you say. I haven't seen Mrs Claus looking that happy in quite some time. It's Vegas! They pump happiness through the air vents. It's not working on me. So that's it? You're just gonna call it quits? I may have lost my wife, but I can still save Christmas. If you get on that sleigh, you may never see her again. Is that want you want? I mean, let's face it, after centuries together, you got complacent and she got bored. She told you that? She didn't have to. You're not exactly Mr Spontaneity. I happen to have a lot of important responsibilities, Calvin. I know, and your heart's in the right place, thinking about the kids, But, sometimes, I wonder if you know how good you have it, being married to Mrs C. So what do I do? You gotta win her back! You gotta woo her all over again. You have to be the guy that you were ago when she fell in love with you. How do I do that? Don't worry about it. I'm on the case! You stay here, unpack your bags. I'll be right back. Ah, sugar cookies! Oh! Ho, ho, ho. Who are you? Oh, I'm sorry. I thought this was Noelle's room. She's my mom. Are you the rich nutjob from across the hall? Yes. I suppose that's me. I guess that's me, yes. Is she here? She's at the concierge desk. OK. Where's that? (SIGHS) OK, follow me. OK. I'm not comfortable with this, sir. We're not giving him a $5000-a-night penthouse suite so he can wallow around in self-pity. He's not gambling because he came here to find his wife. Whatever! Make the call. Give the man a break, OK? He's distraught. All the more reason to make the call! I'm sorry, but I can't do this. I've had to do some pretty messed-up things in this job, but... ..this is where I draw the line. OK. Ginger? It's Duncan over at The Cascades. How are you? Good, good. I have a bit of a dilemma. I have a guest who is in need of a little ho-ho-ho, if you know what I mean. (CHUCKLES) Exactly. Might Roxanna or Brandy be available? Perfect. look her in the eyes, and tell her everything she means to you. That's how you win her back. You're only 7 years old. How do you know so much about this stuff? I live in Vegas. I hear things. Hi, Mom! Hope, honey, what are you doing down here? He didn't know where the concierge desk was so I showed him. I'm sorry, she's not usually with me at work. It's OK, Mom. I gave him really good advice. Oh, ho, ho! She certainly did. Honey, could you just please go back up to our room? Without any pit-stops. Fine. OK. Bye, Kris! Bye, Hope. Thanks for the help. She's a really smart kid. Yeah, sometimes, I think too smart. So how are you doing? Still worried about your wife all alone here in Vegas? Now, this one will assess your ability at finding things in the dark. Off you go! This isn't exactly what I had in mind when she said there'd be a blindfold involved. And it ain't the kind of "tail" I was expecting, either. (KNOCKING) All right, merry gentlemen, now, all of you, make sure you have your candy canes out when Noelle enters. Hi, Noelle! Is everything all right? It's a party! And you are the guest of honour. Me? I'm sorry. Why-why me? Because I need to help you find a nice man. Oh, um... God, Jessica, that is really, really sweet, but I'm working right now, and I-I can't stay. Oh, no, no, no. I won't hear of it. (Just think about it.) (Maybe your future husband is right here, in this room.) Wow! All right, everyone, allow me the honour of introducing Miss Noelle Jenkins. ALL: Hey! Noelle will go around the room and make all of your acquaintances. If she grabs your candy cane, congratulations, you've made it to the next round. If not, no hard feelings, but...there's the door. Get ready! You might be the one. Actually, you know what? I gotta grab a drink, real quick. Oh, yeah, I recommend the Peppermintini. OK! Myles! Take care of her! Did you know about this? No, no, I had no idea. She just asked me to bartend, that's it. But you know what? Now that I'm here, I ain't leaving. You have got to get me out of here! How? I don't know. Think of something. Please? I'll owe you big-time, OK? Here, drink this. I don't think getting me drunk is the answer. You're allergic to raspberries. Remember? Yes! Perfect. (GASPS AND COUGHS) Did you put fresh raspberries in this drink? I am deathly allergic to fresh raspberries. MAN: My god. Allergy? You are? Yeah! Oh, no! Oh. OK, everyone! I'm so sorry, we have a medical emergency here, OK? This woman needs to see a doctor. I'm a doctor! Uh... Yeah, well, she needs to see a casino doctor, OK? It's an insurance thing. (This is it. Everything's going black!) Oh! I got her. No worries! Everything's all right. Everything's gonna be just fine. This party sucks. I'm so sorry, everyone. You've all been so great! You can keep your candy canes! (MEN GRUMBLING) Oh, fiddlesticks. (LAUGHING) Wow! You really love Christmas! I didn't do this. What is going on? Hi, Mom. Hi. Hope, who did all of this? Santa! Didn't he do an amazing job? Hope, Santa didn't decorate this room. OK? Now tell me who was here. Was it Duncan? I told you, it was Santa Claus! You know, Kris from across the hall? He just snapped his fingers, and there it was. Oh! And he even left us a tree to decorate. Honey, what have I told you about answering the door to strangers? Especially if Maria is not here. Kris is not Santa Claus. Yes, he is. I've been waiting for you to get here so that we could start. Come on! OK. Um... Do you want to help us decorate? Yeah, sure. It sounds like fun. Yeah. Great. And thank you for saving me from an incredibly awkward night. My pleasure. Hey, Hope, why don't you practise your song for the Christmas concert? Not now. You don't want to sing in front of Myles? No, I'm too shy. Oh, come on! It's only me. I'm nervous singing in front of other people. Well, you know what? Everyone gets stage-fright once in a while. You just got to breathe and relax, and just get that first note out. So, will you be coming to my concert tomorrow night? You know what, honey? Myles is very busy over the holidays. Yeah, I mean, I have a Christmas party I have to go to anyways, but thanks for the invite, Hope. You're welcome. Hey, um...tell you what, why don't we get some ice cream after the concert? Sure. (LAID-BACK BLUES MUSIC) Oh, wake up and smell the mistletoe, Jessica. It was right above your head the whole time! Oh! Oh! Calvin! Mrs C! Am I ever glad to see you! Your ears are... Oh, what are you doing here? Oh, don't get mad, but I'm here with Kris. He's here? Where is he? He's come to take you home. (KNOCKING) Finally! What happened to you? Sorry, hon. I just got the call. I hear you need some cheering up. Huh? Nobody told me you were so cute! You're gonna make my job easy tonight. Ooh! Love the view! Can I help you, young lady? Oh, I'm Brandy. I heard you needed a little company. Oh, well, uh... Well, normally, I love company, but right now is not the best time, so... Sweet digs, big guy. So why don't you tell me what you like? What I like? Uh-huh. OK. Um... I like a fresh snowfall. Ooh! Hot chocolate. Ooh... And...I love soft dumplings. Oh, this is gonna be so fun! I brought toys! Oh, I love toys. Goodie. I'm gonna go freshen up. Why don't you make yourself comfortable? OK. You big teddy-bear! I'll be right back. Whoa! Your bathroom is bigger than my whole apartment! Get ready for some Brandy! Stop that! No! No, no, no. Why? What, you don't like what you see? No! Not when what I see is an unhappy little girl hiding behind a phoney smile. Now it's time for you to sit down and listen to me. Thank you, Kris, for everything. There you are! Good news! I found Mrs C. And I set up a meeting for you in the hotel bar at 11 o'clock. That's in half an hour. You found her? Oh, that's fantastic! But you can't be late. Got it. I... What? Oh! Uh... Calvin, I'd like you to meet Caroline. Thought you wouldn't mind, I let her borrow your jacket. Nope, I don't mind. Actually, it looks really nice on you. Thank you! Hey, um, do you know how to play Pai Gow poker? It looks like it's really fun. No, but we can learn together. Great! OK. OK. Bye! Hey, do you know how they get the cars on top of the slot machines? You're funny. Yeah, I know. Hit me! Hit me again. Argh! You idiot! That jack was supposed to be his! That's ridiculous! I play by the book. You son of a - You wanna go? Stop that! You're a disgrace to the uniform! (CLANG!) (GATE BUZZES) Pardon me? What time is it? I really have to get out of here! Excuse me? It's nap-time at the North Pole. Now stifle it in there! My wife is waiting for me! First, he forgets our anniversary, and now he stands me up. Mm-hmm. I guess my 500-year-old honeymoon is really over, huh? What should I do? Maybe I can become a professional gambler. Cos I'm lucky. Oh, but then I'd miss all the reindeer and those cute little elves. To think, I'm never gonna see the North Pole again! I'm never gonna see that twinkle in Kris' eyes. Never gonna hear another "ho-ho-ho". You'll feel better after another drink. Hey, partner. Tex! Hey, yo! Fill her up, please, over here. I think she's had enough to drink for one night. You know what? I think you should mind your own business, Myles. What's the point of being nice, huh? I mean, where has it got me? Look! Maybe I should cross over to the naughty side. Good idea. I'm gonna...I'm gonna show you... Let's go to your room. Come here. Whoa! I gotcha. Oh! Ho-ho-ho. OK. OK. Here we go. Here we go, here we go. (Hey, Noelle.) Jessica's had way too much to drink and Duncan's on the prowl. They're headed your way. She needs rescuing. Yeah, OK. I see them, thanks. Duncan! I am so glad I saw you. Listen, I have Evan on the phone. He needs to see you ASAP in his office. Can you... Can I...? I'm busy. I think it's actually really important. OK. OK. Sure. Yeah. I'll be back. Hey. Oh! It's you! Now listen, and listen good. OK. Whatever you do, you don't want to end up like me. All right? You need to open your peepers. Big. Cos sometimes love is right in front of you. In front. You just have to see it! Everything's gonna be fine. I'm gonna take you up to your room, all right? (GATE CLANKS) Rise and shine, Claus! A little elf just paid your bail. Now you can go find Mrs Claus! No credit cards? No cash? No nothing? I put everything I had on black. Um...so are you having car trouble as well? Oh, no. No, that belongs to a friend. I suppose I could give you this. I'm sorry, we can only accept payment through credit card or cash. You know what? Let's talk about this in my office. She's all set. Just comp her for everything, OK? Let's go. Let's go. Let's go to my office and we'll talk about it. OK. Yeah. Yeah. We should've done this when we first got here. Well, I do feel much better. Jessica! Kris? Is that you? It's me. Where were you last night? I-I-I-I- I tried to... There was this girl... and-and she came into my room, and I-I-I thought she was Calvin. She had toys... (STAMMERS ON) ..and I was struck, and the police came, a fight started, and I ended up in jail, and Calvin bailed me out. Shh. You shouldn't even be here! You have huge responsibilities! What about Christmas? Christmas. When you left, you took Christmas with you. Oh, don't say that. Jessica, I am so sorry. You deserve more. No, I...I deserve you. The old you! The you that used to... stop home in the middle of the day to steal a kiss. The you that used to write "I love you, Jessica" in the frosty window pane when you left in the morning for work. That's the you that I deserve! You're right. Oh. I've been ignoring you. Please let me make it up to you. Jessica. I promise, I will never take you for granted again. OK. I've missed you so much! Oh! Oh. Just... Stay right here! Don't go anywhere! OK. Don't move! All right. Excuse me. I think you and I need to have a little chat. Myles! Myles! Oh! Thank goodness you're here. You need to give Hope and Noelle a ride. A ride? To the concert. She has a car. Trust me, it's not working. Bye! Bye. Hey, Alex, could you send these out? I got you covered, man. There's Myles! Hey, guys. Thought you were going to the concert. My car won't start. I'll give you a lift. Really? Yeah! Mom! We're gonna make it! We're gonna make it! Thanks, Myles! Kris! Where are you taking me? Get in and you'll find out. Thank you, Calvin! You're welcome. Elbows. Heh. It's a secret, it's a secret, it's a secret... # 'Neath the willow tree # Sat and piped # I heard him sing Kris! He's playing our song! Jessica Claus, will you do me the honour of renewing our wedding vows? Oh, I would. I will! I do! # Sunshine came along with thee # And swallows in the air # Take my heart and take my ring # I give my all to thee # So, Myles, are you going to stay for the concert? Oh, no, honey. He's just giving us a ride. He's got other places to go, OK? You know... I can go to a party any time. How many chances do I get to hear Hope sing? Yes! You're not gonna be standing up some poor girl, are you? No! No? Really? No date? No date, OK? If you go out with a girl over the holidays, she can get the wrong idea. Like you might actually be interested in a relationship? Exactly. Is that really so awful? Well, it wouldn't be, if it was with the right girl. Think you'll ever find her? I hope so. Hey, kiddo! I got a present for you back there. For me? Yeah. (You didn't have to get her anything.) (Come on, I wanted to.) It's for your door in your room in your new apartment. Oh, my gosh! Thanks, Myles. I love it! Look, mom! Wow! It's so awesome! Thank you. We are here today to celebrate a promise of love made... What anniversary is this? 500 years. OK. 500 years ago between Kris and Jessica. I knew I loved you from the moment you told me that you wanted to make toys for all the children of the world. Oh... Honey, I've loved you ever since I first laid eyes on you. But it was your dumplings that sealed the deal. Oh. Thank you, Calvin. Do you remember? How could I forget? Would you both now please repeat after me, "I promise to always love you tender, love you sweet and never let you go." BOTH: I promise to always love you tender, love you sweet and never let you go. You may now kiss your bride, sir. (SWELLING MUSIC) (COMMUNICATOR PLAYS JINGLE BELLS) Calvin! Calvin, please, I'm begging you. Tell me that you found them and that they're coming home. That's affirmative, Anika. We're almost done here. I promise. He found her. Yeah, he found her! Oh, thank you! Oh! Oh, Calvin. I tell you... Hoo! It was a really dreadful week! I... Oh, Calvin. Whoo! I feel the spirit of Christmas again. Let's go home. Well, I have just one more thing I need to do, and it requires a little bit of your Santa magic. OK. I-I'm not going with you. Wh... I'm sorry. What? I just feel like I belong here. Oh. Well, you certainly do seem to like it here a lot. Yeah. Oh, ho! Oh! OK. Now I get it. Good luck. Thank you. Brandy. Uh...Caroline. She has two names. Bye. Bye. We sure are gonna miss you, Calvin. I'm gonna miss you guys, too. Oh! Caroline! Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas. And now for our last performer of the evening, would you please welcome to the stage, Hope Jenkins. (APPLAUSE) Whoo! (FEEDBACK SQUEALS) (SCATTERED CHUCKLING) Oh, no! AUDIENCE: Awww... Hey. I got it. Excuse me. It's OK, Hope. You don't have to sing if you don't want to. But my mom will be so disappointed! No, no, honey, it's OK. Um... Ladies and gentlemen, it seems like our last performer has had a little case of stage fright, so she won't be singing with us after all. Now, I'd like to... Hey, what's the matter, Hope? There's too many people out there. All right. I got an idea. Thank you very much for coming and have a very merry Christmas. (APPLAUSE) Oh! Um... Ladies and gentlemen, I think we have a last-minute replacement! Um... a Mr... Harper. Myles Harper. Please welcome Myles Harper. (APPLAUSE) Thank you, thank you, everyone. Just to clear up any confusion, I don't actually attend Jefferson Elementary School. (LAUGHTER) You know, the holidays should be a time that we spend with people we care about. Tonight, I'm spending it with Hope and Noelle. This is for you. # Oh, the weather outside is frightful # But the fire's so delightful # Since we've no place to go # Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow # It doesn't show signs of stopping # And I've bought some corn for popping # The lights are turned way down low BOTH: # Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow # When we finally kiss goodnight # How I'll hate going out in the storm # But if you'll really hold me tight # All the way home I'll be warm # The fire is slowly dying # But my dear we're still goodbye-ing # As long as you love me so # Let it snow, let it snow let it snow # Let it snow let it snow, let it snow # Let it snow # Let it sno-o-o-o-w... # (APPLAUSE) (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) You were so good. I'm proud of you. Oh no. What? Remember when you said you'd owe me one? Yeah, that was last night. Well, I'm collecting right now. Myles! Oh, my god, Myles. You were so amazing! I couldn't even believe my eyes when you stepped on stage. Thank you. Uh...what are you doing here? I'm a teacher here. Oh, y... That's... that's right. Yeah. Hi, Miss Bentley. Hi, Hope. Excellent job up there. Thanks. So, wait a minute. Why are you guys all together? Oh, this is... ..my fiancee, Noelle. Yep! That's me. The fiancee. Wow. That was fast. Cos I mean... I thought you and I... OK. Well... Give me a call if things don't work out...I guess. Hmm. I-I will. Wow! Really? Excuse me, Myles? You are unbelievable. Hi. My name's Emily Anders. Hi. I'm a talent scout for a few of the major casinos on the strip. Are you singing anywhere right now? Just in the shower. I think you should give me a call after the holidays. I'll look forward to hearing from you. Thanks! That's great! Wow. What do you think of that? I have you to thank for this. # When the mistletoe is green # Midst the winter snow She's asleep. # Sunshine in thy face is seen... # I guess ice cream's out of the picture, then. I guess so. (ENGINE SPUTTERS) What's wrong? I have no idea. Well, are you out of gas? No, I just filled up the tank. First my car and now yours? What is going on? I'll go take a look. You mind holding the light? Sure. All right... Did... um... Did Hope tell you what she wants for Christmas? No, I tried but she wouldn't budge. She asks for so little, you know? I... I'd love to get her what she wants. I just want her to be happy. She is happy. I think she just wants you to find some happiness. I'm happy enough. What? I am. You haven't dated since that jerk left you. You wear a wedding ring to scare off men. Your whole life consists of work and Hope. I'm OK with that. Besides, it's been so long, I... I wouldn't know where to start. Well, you can start by taking off that fake wedding ring. You know what? I'm not like you, Myles. I don't just hook up with every other person that I meet. That's because you don't let anyone get close to you. And you don't want to be alone. Here. You've got a little, uh... There. I think I got it all. I'm...I'm going to call a tow truck. OK. (DOOR OPENS) (MUFFLED GRUNTING) (MUFFLED) I had nothing to do with this. (SIGHS) Jimmy, get me the Las Vegas Police Department. Evan! No, no, no, no, no, no! What the...? Hi! Santa! Honey, no, I told you, he's not Santa Claus. You're... You're her! Mrs Claus! The one and only. THAT's why they're here! She got my letter. Honey, what letter? Pay attention, Mom. My letter to Mrs Claus! Ho-ho-ho! That was all Jessica. I had nothing to do with it. You were right, Hope. Christmas is the time of year to remember how much we mean to each other. Thank you for reminding us. Noelle... Love is a funny thing. Sometimes, you don't have to look very far to find it. Yeah. And when you do find love... ..never let it slip away. And, Myles... We're really looking forward to seeing you perform on a big stage next time we come back to Vegas. Thanks. Hey, do you want that Peppermintini recipe? Absolutely. Send it to the North Pole. Hope will give you the address. Bye, Santa! Bye, sweetheart. Bye, Mrs Claus. Hope! I'm so glad you wrote me that letter. You take good care, now. Well, time's a-tickin'. Gotta get back to the North Pole. Can't miss the big day! Oh, uh... (ENGINE STARTS UP) You kids better get going! Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. I don't think they think we're us. (CHUCKLES) Hope knows. That's what counts. I think I'm gonna miss looking young. Oh, sugarplum. You're beautiful at any age. You ready to go home? Uh...Mom? I think Santa left us something... And...I think it's alive. Where did that come from? He did it, Mom! Santa got me a puppy. What is going on? I have no idea. It's full of money! What? There's a note. "Dear Noelle, For your two-bedroom apartment. Or perhaps you're going to need an even bigger place. Love, Santa. PS: the puppy is for Hope." I told you he was the real Santa Claus! (PUPPY WHINES) (SLEIGH BELLS JINGLE) Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho! Whoa! What was that? It's snowing. It's snowing! Wow! I love it! I think I just saw a shooting star. Did you make a wish? I did. (DISTANT JINGLE OF BELLS) Hey, Mom! Mom! Mom! Look! Wow! Oh, Kris! Look. A letter from our dear Hope! Oh! How is she? Oh, my. Noelle and Myles are getting married. Oh! And we're invited to attend! Well, we can't miss that. Oh, I'm so excited! I'll need a new dress, and matching Mukluks and... Well, maybe just a little pinch of your magic sparkle-dust. Oh! Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho! Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!